Darkness... That was all he could see, that was all he ever saw in this dream. What it lacked in visuals it made up for tenfold in audio. He could hear so much, and he knew where each sound came from, though he could never explain how he knew. The sounds which got to him the most, however, were the screaming of foals, the crying of ponies losing their child or their special somepony, and the worst, the sounds of death. It was always here, amid that sounds of blasts striking bodies or buildings, that a set of soulless screams rang out, repeating the same word.
"EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!" It was always here that he would call out the same two words with anger, hate, and remorse.
"NO MORE!"
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Time Turner jumped as he fell out of his bed. It was the third time this week that he had had that dream. It had originally been once every three months but ever since the coronation of Princess Twilight Sparkle it quickly grew worse. The tan stallion yawned as he trotted into the kitchen. He opened the fridge and poured himself some milk as he looked to one of the many clocks on the wall. 'In three...two...one...' A grey and blue blur slammed into a couch. He shook his head as he walked over to the mailmare, who was rubbing her head.
"Morning Derpy," he greeted with a tired smile. She looked up to him, one eye on him while the other looked away.
"Good morning Time Turner." The mare then sat straight as she used one hoof to fix her hat while she placed the other on his face.
"You had that dream again," she said sadly. The stallion pulled himself away with a frown.
"I can never hide anything from you, can I?" The clock repair pony had asked that question many times before in the first year of their friendship, since the first day when she had literally crashed into him, knocking him into the chair he set up just for her. It was at this the mailmare smiled motherly.
"Nope," he laughed as he walked back into the kitchen, pulling out something for the mailmare to eat for the morning route.
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Outside Ponyville a storm-grey earth pony was pulling a cart of supplies to the town. He paused, sitting before the cart as he wiped the sweat off his brow with a bandana from his jacket pocket. A slight rustling in the bushes caught his attention.
"Hello?" the stallion called out as he stepped cautiously closer to the bush. Something jumped hissing out of the bushes as the stallion let out a terrified scream, too far from the town for anypony to hear him and help.
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Time Turner was sitting before his work bench with a cuckoo clock when his door chimed, signaling that two ponies had entered his shop. He looked at the clock before him, then the many others of different designs, to see they all read the same time. This caused the clock repairer to smile as he looked to the two standing before the back room’s door frame. One of the two mares seemed to be bigger than they actually were due to the magnifying lens on his right eye. The magnified pony was a unicorn filly with grey violet fur and blonde mane, her golden eyes overflowing with happiness.
The second was a pink unicorn with a violet mane and tail with a streak similar to a lavender flower, and amethyst eyes that were looking at him amusedly.
"Hi Time Turner," the two said as they walked toward the brown stallion. He hugged the older mare first, then turned to the younger, who was bouncing around in absolute joy.
"So, whose clock are you working on today?" the pink mare inquired as she examined the cuckoo clock, the bird of the clock stuck on the outside.
"Same old same old, Pinkie somehow got cake in the clock again. What about you Sparkler? Dinky?" he asked the pink unicorn, then the grey one.
"I ran into Miss Rarity and Spike today while searching for gems; I traded her some gems she could use for her clothes for some of the flawless ones she had. It wasn't easy keeping them from the little dragon," the older one, Sparkler, replied as she pulled a few of the jewels out to illustrate her point with with a sapphire, opal, and emerald. The smaller one jumped around as she squeaked.
"Today I was with my friends playing at Apple Bloom's by the Everfree Forest when I found this on one of the trees. I think it's enchanted, different ponies see different things, Like Applejack saw a timberwolf with the word listen, and Apple Bloom saw three ponies by a candle." Dinky lifted out the scroll in question and rolled it open to reveal it's message. It held a picture of a pony with the shadow of a monster behind it. The word above it was small and it seemed to be sloppy. "What does it say for you, Turner?" The stallion barely heard the filly then smiled.
"It just told me something very silly Dinky. Say, why don't you girls go wait for your mum in shop; It's almost time for her shift to end after all and I'm sure she'd love to have you both as the first things she sees." Both shook their heads as they left to the other room. Time Turner sat before the frosting filled clock, looking through it, as the silly little paper haunted him. It wasn't the picture that got to him; it was what it said. That one simple word chilled him to the bone.
“Beware”
Awsome
Not a bad story, but you tell more than you show, it comes off a little rushed.
Also, there are times when the same word is used again too soon. Should use a synnymn for that.
4023000 Wacky thanks for the comment, I'll try and fix that for the next chapters
4022967 RAINBOWDASH78 Thank you
4024076 im guessing this is like the family episode so tome turner jas a watch with his realself in there and derpy knows all about it
4024076 That's cool. So long as you're always will to strive to improve, you're doing great.
4025748 I do, but I'm sad to say this is the only site I've ever gotten feedback on.
4024289 Well... you know what episode I was inspired by for one part, that being the watch. The rest however, you'll have to read to find out.
4027540 I know that feeling all too well.
Most of the time people will only comment if something is bad, or really, REALLY good. Just keep doing it for yourself and you'll stay motivated.
4027562 Were you suprised i guessed that is for this story on the watch part
4028657 Nope, I was hoping for it.
4028657 Nope, I was hoping for it.
4031457 I know my doctor who or whooves in this case
4031498 Indeed
4032499
Looks very interesting, but you might want to slow down a bit. I shall eagerly await further content.
The sounds which got him the most however was the screaming of foal's
-Should be foals (not possessive)
that a set of soulless scream rung out,
-screams (I imagine should be plural)
It was the third time week he had that dream
- time that week?
- he'd had
You use 'mailmare' a lot in the second paragraph.
something jump out of the bushes
- jumped
this caused the clock repairer to smile
- I'm honestly not sure of the correct terminology for this one, but I'm pretty sure repairer is not a word. :/
as he looked too the two standing before the back rooms doorframe.One of the two mares
- to
-room's
- and you missed a space after the fullstop.
similar to a lavender flower,amethyst eyes
- Missing space again
brown stallion He hugged
- Needs a comma between stallion and hugged
So, who's clock are you working on today?
- whose
she could use for her cloths for some of the flawless one's
- clothes
-ones
wait for your mum in shop
- In the shop?
Both shook there heads
- their
I'm nitpicking I know, but I'm just trying to help :)