Shy Words

by Ryuler

Marvelous Morning

The fresh summer air, breezing through her mane. The soft ground below her, and the smell of pastries, flowers, and coffee mixing together into a blissful aroma. She was a gentle pony; smart, wise, and friendly. She had a purple coat, that matched her straight dark purple mane with pink highlights. She had a horn, that extended from her forehead, gently parting the front of her hair, and on her flank was a bright red star with white sparkles accompanied beside it. Her name was Twilight Sparkle, and she was the official librarian of a town called Ponyville. She loved the town, and her friends, and it was just a normal day for her as she cantered through the streets.

She was unaccompanied by her assistant, Spike, who was a small baby dragon of purple and green scales. It was early in the morning, around 9am, and Twilight was enjoying her stroll down to meet Pinkie Pie at Sugarcube Corner to enjoy a relaxing breakfast. There were plenty of other ponies trotting about their own business on the streets that she passed by. She approached the door to the building of her destination, preparing herself for the delicious treats that were sealed within. The structure was different than most of the buildings in Ponyville. Rather than appearing white with straw roofs, it had a look all of its own. It did indeed posses white walls, however, wandering eyes stray away and fixate on the abnormal roof of the building. The roof was chocolate brown, and lined with a white substance assumed to be faux frosting, along with other colors of the spectrum, and three candles on the very top.

Twilight eagerly opened to doors to the entrance, and stepped inside to be greeted by a warm interior, and the overwhelming smell of sweet pastries and other baked goods. Sugarcube Corner's interior matched its exterior with vibrant colors, and edible looking inanimate objects. Twilight approached the front counter which lacked a cashier at the moment, at least until Twilight rang the silver bell intelligently perched on the right.

"Yippie! Hey there Twilight! What brings you here?" a flamboyant pink earth pony cheered.

Her name was "Pinkamena Diane Pie," but everyone referred to her as simply "Pinkie Pie." Her name truly matched her appearance, as her coat is bright pink, covered by her mane, which was simply a darker shade of pink. Her mane was curly and fanatical, her eyes cyan, and her cutie mark a small bundle of three party balloons. She was known as the party pony of Equestria, and she loved to have fun and laugh more than anything else.

"Hello there Pinkie," Twilight replied with a smile, staring at the pastries advertised in various sections of the store through her dark purple eyes. "I came here to relax and enjoy one of Sugarcube Corner's delicious treats, but I have no idea what to get." she explained with a happy tone in her voice. Pinkie was more than happy to assist.

"OOOOH, well do you want cake, candy, chocolate, muffins, cookies, pie..." She trailed off in a barrage of words all relative to baked goods and sweet candies.

Twilight simply smiled and made her decision "I think I'll have 2 chocolate chip cookies," she selected.

"Okie dokie lokie!" The pink pony replied as she spun around in mid air, and began bouncing on all four hooves away from Twilight. She returned short moments later with a bag gripped in her mouth that contained Twilight's choice of baked goods. She placed it on the counter, with a chirpy smile,

"That'll be four bits."

Twilight placed four bits onto the counter, which is the general currency in Equestria, and completed the exchange. She used her magic to telepathically elevate the bag off the counter and to her side. She waved Pinkie goodbye, and exited the building of many colors, traveling with the bag still at her side. Her next goal was to find a comfortable bench to rest upon, and enjoy her treat. Her goal was achieved as she located a small bench fixated on the edge of the streets under a large green tree. She took her seat upon the bench, and was able to overlook the streets, watching other ponies as they ventured by. After shuffling around, and achieving a relaxing position upon the bench, she gripped the bag in her fore hooves, and unwrapped it. Her reward for releasing the cookies from their paper confines was a rich scent of chocolate and a small puff of warm air. She used her right hoof to delve into the bag, and she retrieved one of her two chocolate chip cookies, which she began to consume.

She took a glance above her, witnessing the white clouds strolling across the vibrant blue sky through the many branches and leaves of the tree. She closed her eyes, relaxing every muscle in her body, completely taken by everything around her. The warm air that brushed against her coat, the sound of gentle wind chimes clinging together and the leaves rustling, the rich taste of the cookies, and the smell of chocolate. She never imagined that anything could triumph over the blissful feeling of a moment like the one she was experiencing. Time escaped her world; she was shocked at how fast she devoured her delicious treats. Left with nothing else to do, she abandoned her seat on the bench, threw away the empty paper bag, and set her course for home. However, her trek was peacefully interrupted when a certain pegasus crossed her path.

"Hello there Fluttershy," Twilight waved to her friend

"Huh? Oh, hello there Twilight," the pegasus responded.

The one called Fluttershy is a pegasus. Her coat is a pale yellow, and her uniquely shaped mane is pink in color. Her hair is long, silky and curled at the tips. She occasionally uses her hair as a pseudo shield to hide behind when she planted in uncomfortable situations or crowds of unknown ponies. She possesses cyan eyes, and a cutie mark consisting of three pink butterflies on her flank. She is an expert on assisting and feeding small wild animals, and although she is a pegasus, she doesn't enjoy soaring through the skies very much.

"Where are you heading to?" the purple unicorn asked.

"Well, I was going to get some more carrots to feed Angel tonight."

Angel was Fluttershy's pet, he was merely a small white rabbit.

"Alright. Is it ok if I... how do you say... 'tag along'?" Twilight shot a quick smile, she wasn't too acquainted with the studies of "street talk."

"Oh of course, I mean, if you want to that is," Fluttershy replied.

Twilight simply responded with a nod of her head, and walked beside her friend, following her to her destination.

"So, how are things Fluttershy? It's been a while since I've seen you."

"Things are great."

"So, the animals are ok? No problems or anything?"

"Oh no not at all."

"Have you done anything fun or different lately?"

"No."

Twilight was feeling a tad awkward by Fluttershy's short replies, which she seemed to force out without even looking in
Twilight's direction.

"Well ok," the unicorn added, without much left to say.

They continued walking together, but few words were exchanged. Twilight had a theory that something was bothering Fluttershy, they pegasus seemed a little disturbed. She figured that spending time with her would cheer her up, maybe they could go have lunch later that afternoon, or play in the park.

"What are doing later today?" Twilight asked "Other than feeding Angel, and... the others." she quickly added.

"Uh... that's it. Feeding Angel and some of the other animals, that's it."

"Ok, well, do you think you will have time to maybe do something?"

Fluttershy looked at the purple unicorn, "Like what?" she then returned her gaze to the streets in front of her.

"Not sure, we can go to lunch, or a performance, or uh..." Twilight pondered for a few moments. "How about a sleepover?"

Fluttershy perked up a bit, happily "That sounds fun," she smiled at her friend.

"Ok!" Twilight almost cheered "How about my place tonight at 8pm. Spike will be sound asleep upstairs, and we can
stay downstairs for the night."

"Sounds great," Fluttershy agreed.

Twilight smiled "Well, I'm going to head home now. See you later Fluttershy."

"Ok, goodbye Twilight."

The unicorn cantered home, excited for the night to come. "We're going to have so much fun, we're going to tell stories, and do makeovers, and..." she froze for a moment. She thought over what she had created. What she had created was a sleepover, for her and Fluttershy. In her mind all she could imagine was a night of small conversation, and barely any fun. Although Fluttershy was her friend, she realized this was probably not one of her greatest ideas. She shook the irritable thoughts from her mind of the night becoming boring, and became optimistic, imagining it would turn for the better.

"Tonight's going to be just great."

Comments

[BlankFlankBrony]

Given how it's written, this would be an excellent introductory fic for someone unfamiliar with the show. Has potential.

15242 agree with this. Could use a prereader next time. Also, i read this in an Austrian accent. I dunno, just seemed right. One thing to work on is your tense, otherwise fine

Very detailed descriptions for cast members most/all of us already know.

[Ryuler]

15308 I do realize the elaborate descriptions of each character were rather superfluous. Being my first Fanfic of anything, this is more of a project to challenge myself. Constructive Criticism is welcomed, as I hope to better my writing capabilities.

[Captain Thomas]

As has been mentioned before, the descriptions are needlessly elaborate and some of them, like the description of bits, aren't really nessecary at all and only distracts from the actual story.
You also suddenly switch from past to present tense when describing Fluttershy, which is somewhat jarring.
Other than that it's shaping up to be a nice story and I'm looking foreward to reading more

[Fox-Sama]

Hummm, you spent most if the chapter explaining who the ponies are, not to sound rude or anything but if the people on this site don't know who Flutter shy pinkie, and twilight are, then they are on the wrong site lol

But you have the build for a really good story, I hope to read chapter 2 soon.

[PatRoison]

This was a very good first chapter. A few misspellings and a bit of a formatting issue, though that could be on my end, but not enough to ruin the story. Consider yourself watched, and I look forward to chapter 2

Just a quick note, I think you meant that she telekinetically lifted the elevated the bag. Telepathy is a realm of power that deals with thought and emotion, not physically altering an object or moving it through space. x3

[ThePhantomAssassin]

I haven't finished reading yet, but I wanted to point something out now before I forget. Near the top, you say "She used her magic to telepathically elevate the bag off the counter and to her side." I have a major problem with that. You can remove my comment, I don't care, but Telepathy, is speaking into someones mind. What you might want to do, is switch it from Telepathically, to "She used her magic to elevate the bag off the counter with telekinesis, and then to her side" or simply pull that word out all together. Unless telepathically means something else when used in that format, it's a form of speaking via through one's mind. Kinda like what King Kai does with Goku on Dragonball Z. If it does mean something else, let me know so I can apologize. So far great story, you are describing this as if you were reading it off to someone who's never seen the show, which I think is nice, because I for one read a Fan-Fic before I stared watching the show.

[Pidgeons]

15368

That you realize this, encourages me to read the rest of it. It's really grating, but I can live with it. My only other complaint would be that despite Fluttershy being . . . well, Fluttershy, is that I have a hard time picturing it to cross Twilight's mind that a sleepover with Fluttershy would be boring. In fact, the only perspective where thinking would make sense to me is if it were in Rainbow Dash's point of view instead of Twilight.