From Allies to Enemies: The Best Medicine for an Abrupt Invasion (FAtE)

by DaBeejees

Chapter 3

"Good morning, my officers."

We were gathered in the dining hall, about to receive our first briefing over a much-needed breakfast.

"May I ask how you all slept?"

"Very well, especially after Lt. Col. Briar gave out the very first order!"

They all laughed heartily, sans Maj. Dash, myself, and the Princess; I was limited to just a chuckle, Maj. Dash simply rolled her eyes, and the Princess raised an eyebrow.

"Oh? May I ask what it was?"

Maj. Applejack laughed as she quoted me: "'Major Dash! Quit ya bitchin' an' go ta sleep!'"

Everypony laughed heartily once again, the Princess and I included this time; Maj. Dash simply slouched down into her chair and rolled her eyes again.

After everypony calmed back down, the Princess cleared her throat and made sure she had everypony's attention before she began to speak:

"I feel that this would be a good opportunity for you all to receive you first order from me"

We all perked up even more than we already had been, and waited attentively for the Princess to continue.

"Throughout the course of this war, regardless of the end result, I want you all to use humor whenever you possibly can, but even more importantly, I want you all to milk that humor for all it's worth."

Capt. Rarity immediately stood up, and slammed her front hooves on the table. "Objection!"

"Overruled!" I looked down momentarily and scrunched my snout, realizing that I had just responded exactly as a judge would. "And just sit back down, Captain; this ain't a courtroom, and may Celestia help us all if it was." I extended a gesturing hoof in the direction of the Princess when I said her name. "And furthermore, it does make sense, which I'm certain the Princess is all ready to explain." I signal that I'm finished speaking by turning toward the Princess with a nod, while Capt. Rarity slowly sat back down, defeated.

The Princess returned my nod. "Thank you, colonel."

"Wait, COLONEL? When did he get promoted?"

"Once again, Maj. Dash, quit your bitching, I haven't been promoted; Lt. Colonels are simply referred to as 'colonel' in conversation for fluency's sake." The Princess confirmed this with a nod.

"Oh, okay. My apologies, sir."

I simply nod at her, knowing my words would give away my inner surprise that Maj. Dash had already given in to having superiors, and referring to them as such.

"However, Princess, I feel that it would make more sense if I be referred to as 'lieutenant' in conversation, so as to avoid any confusion between myself and Col. Sparkle."

The Princess smiled. "As I was saying, lieutenant, the reason why I'm ordering you to use humor is simple: it's extremely likely to be the one thing that will keep you alive. And also, the 'alive' in this case should be taken in several ways. The first is literally. The second...hm, lieutenant? If possible, could you explain the second, since you seem to understand this already? I feel that you will be able to word it more efficiently than I could."

"Certainly, Princess. The second would be..." I take a moment myself to search for the proper words. "...would be us as ponies. War changes ponies. Look at each of us here. Those of us who see the end of this war will not be the same as who we are now. We may not even recognize each other. That's why this is so crucial: not just to keep ourselves alive, but also to keep alive our--"

"--friendship"

I simply nod to Col. Sparkle to let her know that she had completed my sentence correctly.

"Exactly. Do you all understand this order?" After being met with a round of nods, the Princess continued. "Moving on, then. Now, we need to determine how each division will function -- as in weapons, and the like -- with the obvious exception of colonel Briar. I highly advise that we help one another with brainstorming, so we can get as many ideas out as possible to increase our efficiency. Col. Sparkle? Should we begin with your artillery?"

"Thank you, Princess. I must admit, I haven't thought much about it, but I do think that the artillery should be powered by and fired with magic..."

"Why is it always magic?"

"It makes sense to me."

"And to me as well; the Griffonite army wouldn't be able to use our own artillery against us, should they come in possession of some."

"Yes, and the use of magic would mean that direct contact with the weapon would not be necessary, would allow them to be fired from a safe distance away, in case of a mis-fire."

"You'd need different kinds of artillery, too, wont'cha Colonel?"

"You're right, Maj. Pie, we would. Which do you guys think would be our primary, though?"

"Isn't it your artillery, Colonel?

"Um...w-we're still brainstorming...m-m'am..."

"Oh, yeah...right. Thank you, Captain."

"Personally, I would suggest mortars, Colonel."

"Ooh! Yeah! Mortars have a huuuuuuuuumooooongus range!"

"An' they can fire dif'frent kinds'a shells, too!"

"I myself agree: mortars would prove to be extremely useful, and adaptable, too."

"Alright, mortars it is! Anypony else have any ideas?"

"Well, Ah was thinkin' 'bout poss'bly havin' ah sub-group of mah Heavy Infantry that could be able to attack from a distance..."

"YES!"

There was an awkward silence that ensued as everypony else slowly turned and looked at me.

"Ar'ya really that excited 'bout mah idea, lew-teh-nant?"

"I thought that the awkward silence had made that obvious, but yes, I am. I already have a number of ideas of how to utilize something like that, though it would vary pending upon what the ammunition would be. I assume that you would be bucking them, Major?"

"Yep, that's what Ah was thinkin', sir."

"What about bucking rocks?!"

"Yeah! An' with ah lil' bit ah trainin', we should easily be able ta buck'em at high speeds, too!"

"That would prove to be extremely beneficial to defend against an enemy charge, especially!"

"And for a surprise attack from above! Like from a high ledge, or something!"

"Sounds like it's official, then...well, once you think of a name for it, Major."

"Ah'll giddon it, sir!"

"And while we're on the infantry, what about your Light Infantry, Maj. Pie?"

"And please try to be direct about it, Major."

"Ooh! Well, I've actually thought of several things that the Light Infantry could do! Since we'd be so lightly-armored, we'd be rather speedy! So we could be scouts! Or we could be sneaky and flank the enemy if they're busy fighting Maj. Apple's Heavy Infantry or something! Or--"

"Alright, that's enough for now, Major. It seems that your infantry would be able to do a variety of different things, but there's a good chance that many things would be done more of on the spot, though those are good ideas for possible sub-groups, such as Maj. Apple's--"

"BOULDER-BUCKERS!" An awkward silence ensued, before I began to laugh.

"Now you know how I felt, Major!" I joked, receiving laughs from the others as well. "And it seems that you've found a name!"

"That Ah have, sir."

"How about your cavalry, Maj. Dash?"

"Well, since we're the cavalry, I know that we'd be involved mainly in--"

I suddenly jumped in my chair as I got an idea.

"I take it you have an idea, sir?"

"Yes, I do. And my apologies for the interruption, Major."

"Don't worry about it, sir."

"Well, my idea was...well, since it seems that we've decided that Maj. Pie's Light Infantry would be used for a variety of miscellaneous things, would specialists fall under there? Such as--"

"EXPLOSIVES?!"

"Well...yes."

"I think that that would be appropriate for the Light Infantry, but again, we'll have to go over the specifics for it at a later time. As you had been saying Maj. Dash?"

"Thank you, Princess. I know that we'd be heavily involved in air combat, so whatever weapons we use would need to be specialized. I know that the traditional cavalry weapon is a shoulder-mounted lance, but I have some concerns about that: they've been known to be rather heavy -- not enough to slow you down, but enough to be able to throw you off-balance easily. Also, if your lance gets broken, you're as good as dead."

"Those are valid points, Major, and something that now concerns me, as well. We'd need to think of a different possible weapon, or even design a new one entirely."

"Sir, I'd be happy to work with Maj. Dash to design a new weapon for her cavalry to use."

"Fine by me; after all, you do design for a living!"

"Agreed. How about your medics, Capt. Shy?"

"Oh, um, well, the only things that I would really need is medical supplies and a number of medical tents..."

"Simple enough. And finally, how about your supplies, Capt. Rarity?"

"Well, I will most likely be stitching together tents and clothes, preparing food; you know, those sorts of things."

"Splendid! Now, if I may have your attention again, please..."

We all looked at the Princess, once again waiting for her to continue, and listened intently when she did.

"In a matter of hours, I will be making my announcement to the public regarding the war, as we are the only ones who so far know of it. And when I do...I would like all of you to be present, as I would like to introduce you, my officers, as well as your ranks and your respective assignments. Is that clear?" The Princess raised her right-front hoof up in a salute, followed by all of us officers, only releasing our salutes once the Princess dropped hers, as was the rule -- in a salute, whoever was of highest rank would be the first one to salute, and everypony else cannot drop theirs until that superior officer in question drops theirs. "Now, there are some new uniforms awaiting you in the room where you had spent the night, next to each of your beds. Go put them on, and report back to me when summoned. You are dismissed."

Comments

[rasta-gringo]

I have nothing important to say in chapter 3. I kind of hope that I forget about boulder bucking before it pops up again, it sounds funny.

I've also noticed that Briar acts as a Gandalf. He knows his shit just because it keeps things from falling apart. Interesting