Surviving in a Strange Two Legged World

by aCB

3 - Explosions and Breakfast

Spike sat on the large bed upon which Twilight was currently unconscious. It had been a half a day since Applejack and Rainbow Dash disappeared into the portal. Rarity had come in and had a talk with Spike concerning all that had been discussed and transpired. It made him happy that there was a possible solution, but the diminished chances of the plan's success plagued his mind. In truth, it bothered everypony that was privy to the details, but it seemed to be an unspoken rule that nopony mention the pessimistic aspects of it. Princess Celestia had insisted on swearing all those involved to secrecy, making any discussion about it near impossible.

Spike sighed as he put down the book he was trying to read. He hadn’t thought ahead to bring anything to do, since he had anticipated on spending the entirety of his time helping Twilight with the cataloging of the hidden storeroom. It was one of Twilight’s books which concerned the history of enchanting practices of the Dark Age. He wasn’t really reading it as much as scanning the lines of print with his eyes, taking in a plethora of useless words in an attempt to calm his mind. It wasn’t working.

“I don’t think I’ve seen you leave this room at all today,” said a female voice from the doorway.

Spike looked up. A nurse pony had entered. She had one of the purest, whitest coats he had ever seen, with a mane the color of the brightest of Sweet Apple Acre’s red delicious apples. She was very beautiful. Okay, maybe not as beautiful as Rarity, but who could top that? She was definitely a close second though.

“I don’t know,” Spike replied with a sigh, “I just don’t feel like doing anything.”

The nurse walked over and began checking Twilight’s pulse.

“I don’t think I’m the only one who could tell you that it’s not healthy. It’s okay to be sad, but if you sit here and obsess over it, it’ll drive you crazy.”

The nurse looked right into Spike’s eyes and smiled. He felt his heart give a slight flutter.

“Yeah…” he replied, temporarily tongue-tied.

“My name is Carmine Quartz. I take it you’re Spike?”

“Yeah, how’d you know?”

“Everypony in the Crystal Empire knows who you are, Spike,” she laughed, “You really didn’t think we’d forget the baby dragon that saved us from slavery, did you?”

“That was mostly Twilight. I only brought the crystal heart she found to Princess Cadence. I didn’t really do much.”

“Nonsense. What you did was outright heroic, and the crystal ponies honor their heroes. There’s a lot of us who are really grateful. I’m one of them,” she finished with the slightest blush.

Spike blushed in return; Carmine was really pretty. And really nice. And understanding. He watched her with growing interest as she finished recording Twilight’s medical data. He noticed how tenderly she treated Twilight. Truly this pony had a heart as soft as her touch.

“I’ve never seen anything like this in the entire time I’ve studied medicine,” she said, “It’s really is… strange. We haven’t really been told much other than to keep an eye on the patient and call the doctors if something is amiss. This must be some kind of weird weapon to do this to somepony. What is it?”

As she asked, her hoof brushed gently against the handle of the dagger. Spike was hesitant. He wanted to tell this nice mare everything, but he didn’t want to disobey Celestia. She usually had her reasons to make the rules she did even if he couldn’t understand them.

“Princess Celestia doesn’t want anypony knowing about it,” he explained cautiously, “I’m not really supposed to talk about what I know. I want to tell you, I really do, but I can’t.”

“It’s okay,” she replied, rubbing Spike’s head with her hoof affectionately, “I don’t want you to disobey the Princess. How about this? My shift’s about to be over. Why don’t you come with me and we’ll go down to the crystal library and find you something a bit more entertaining to read?”

She said this as she looked down at the book Spike had been staring at for the past two hours. As much as he hated leaving Twilight, she was right. He was going to go crazy like this. Not to mention he hadn’t eaten anything since Twilight was hurt. Maybe going out would help ease his mind a little bit, especially if he was going with this pony.

His stomach suddenly gave a loud gurgling noise, protesting his lack of appetite. Carmine laughed.

“Why don’t we get you some breakfast while we’re out?” she suggested, “It’ll be my treat, although I daresay you could probably eat for free anywhere in the crystal empire once they see that it’s Spike the hero dining there.”

Spike blushed and nodded in agreement. He followed the friendly mare as she left the room to leave the castle.

***

Applejack looked out over the expanse of Sweet Apple Acres. It was almost identical to the place she called home in Equestria. It really was a comforting sight after that last night of chaos. She beckoned to Rainbow Dash as she headed down the dirt road to the farmhouse. Fall was in full swing with the leaves of all the apple trees beginning to turn red and yellow along their fringes.

“Come on, AJ. Let’s hurry up and get down there. I’m tired as a pack mule walking from Manehatten to Los Pegasus. Let’s get in there and get some shuteye already.”

Applejack rolled her eyes, “We all don’t even know these ponie… – people. (Gosh darn it Ah gotta stop that) What makes you think their gonna let some strangers just trot on into their home and pass out in their beds?”

“Well, for one, you’re Applejack. You practically live here already. We’ll just go in, everypony will recognize you, and they’ll just let us…”

“Rainbow! Don’t ya think maybe they’ll be a little startled when another Applejack just waltzes in their house? Ah mean, the other Applejack’ll know about the portal, but nopony who wasn’t there when Twilight came won’t have any clue. Y’all better let me do the talkin’. Ah don’ think you have the… tact for this.”

“Tact! You calling me untactful?! I’ll have you know that I can convince anypony to do anything, anytime!”

“Like how tactful y’all were with that police officer?”

“…Alright, you can talk.”

By this time the girls had reached the Apple family farmhouse. AJ could hear voices coming from the kitchen window (at least, it was a kitchen window at her farmhouse). She took a deep breath and knocked on the door with an awkwardly balled fist. After a moment, the door opened to reveal whom she could only assume to be Big Macintosh.

He started to smile welcomingly as his eyes fell upon Rainbow Dash, but his green eyes widened in alarm and confusion when he noticed the humanized Applejack.

“Ee-what?”

He threw closed the farmhouse door in panic, and the girls outside could here running and shouting inside.

“Well that went over well.”

“Shuddup, Rainbow.”

AJ pressed her ear to the door to hear what they were talking about inside, but it was no use. Besides hearing the hushed tone of harsh whispers, she had no idea what they were doing.

“What do we do now? You want me to knock?”

AJ thought about this. Big Mac hadn’t seemed to be shocked when he saw Dash, so maybe he had assumed that she was this world’s Rainbow Dash that had come for a visit. Maybe it would be easier to have her convince them everything wasn’t amiss. She was about to suggest this, but the door opened a few inches, distracting her.

Standing in the crack of the doorway, a full foot shorter than the pony-girls, was a girl with soft yellow skin and long red curls.

“Look, we don’ want any trouble,” she said, “Ah don’ know what’s goin’ on here, but we know y’all ain’t Applejack. Ah just called her cell, and AJ’s been at the farmer’s market all mornin’. Jus’ go an’ we won’t have to call the police.”

Rainbow Dash was about to respond, but seeing the aggressive look on her face, Applejack cut her off.

“Look, Applebloom… It is Applebloom, right?”

“…Yeah.”

“Ah know this is probably kinda weird, but we really need your help. Rainbow an’ I… we’re in trouble. If y’all would jus’ give us a chance, we can explain everything.”

Applebloom looked hesitant. Before she could respond, Applejack could hear Granny Smith calling at her from inside the house.

“It’s okay, Granny! Ah’ll be there in a minute.”

“Look, Ah don’ know what y’all’s game is,” she continued, “But we don’ want any part of it. Please go.”

Applejack thought quickly for a solution. They needed someone to vouch for them.

“Applebloom,” she pleaded quickly, “If we can talk to Applejack, Ah’m sure we can clear this all up. Just let us have a few words with Applejack. Where is she?”

Applebloom thought for a minute, and then took out a small black rectangle from her pocket. She pressed on the surface of it briefly and handed it to Applejack.

“What the hay is this?” demanded Rainbow, “We asked you where to find Applejack! Why’d you give us this thing?”

“Hello?” spoke a barely audible voice. It seemed to be coming out of the box in AJ’s hand. She held it tentatively up to her face. On the surface of it were the words “Applejack – 0:05” and a picture of the human Applejack.

“Uhh… Hi?” responded AJ with uncertainty. She didn’t know quite what to do, so she held the phone in a position where she could both see the picture of her doppelganger and have half the phone to her ear at the same time.

“Who is this?” demanded the voice in the box in a familiar voice, “What’re y’all doin’ with mah sister’s phone?”

“This may seem weird but…” Applejack started, still staring at the picture.

“Ah can’t hear y’all. Speak up!”

Applebloom sighed impatiently. She grabbed the phone and shoved it onto Applejack’s face in the correct position.

“An’ Ah though we were behind the times…” she muttered.

“Uh… Applejack? This may seem weird,” explained the pony AJ, “But this is, uhm… Applejack. Ah need your help.”

The phone was quite for a moment.

“Is this some kind of joke?” the human AJ responded.

“No, listen. Do y’all remember ‘bout a year ago when a girl called Twilight came through a portal by your school?”

“…Yeah?”

“Well, she’s in trouble, and we could really use your help. Ya see, apparently there’s a copy of everypon… - everyone on both sides of the portal, and Ah guess… Ah guess Ah’m your copy. Twilight’s in a whole heap of trouble. We really need to talk to you.”

The phone was silent for a few moments. AJ’s heart sank. Ah guess she didn’t believe me…Suddenly, she got a response.

“Ah’m not sayin’ Ah believe you, but if Twilight really is in trouble, then Ah’ll help. Y’all just stay right where ya are. Ah’m gonna close up shop here and Ah’ll be down there lickity-split. Give the phone back ta Applebloom.”

She did as she was told.

“Yeah… Really?... Well what do Ah do until then?... You sure?... Alright, bye…”

Applebloom put the phone back in her pocket and pointed to a swinging bench on the porch.

“Applejack says y’all can sit there until she gets here. Ah’m gonna head on back inside. Jus’ sit still until she gets here, an’ don’ try anything funny.”

The two girls sat down on the bench. Applebloom eyed them suspiciously as she backed away toward the door, never turning her back to them. Quick as lighting, she ducked back inside then slammed the door.

“Nice people,” Rainbow commented sarcastically.

“Now don’t be that way, Rainbow Dash. If they’re anything like the Apples in Ponyville, then you won’t find friendlier folk. They’re just protective of their kin is all. In all honesty, Ah probably woulda done the same thing if some weird Applejack copycat appeared on mah doorstep outta the blue. Ah’m sure when we talk to Applejack, we’ll get this all cleared up and they’ll be able to tell us how to find the other Twilight.”

“Yeah, I guess…”

They sat in awkward silence for a few minutes, the chilly autumn air making them more and more uncomfortable as time went on. Applejack just wished the portal would have been decent enough to give her a jacket. She looked over at Rainbow Dash. She was a lot skinnier, so AJ was sure that she would be absolutely shivering by now, but that was not the case. She simply looked bored and annoyed.

“Y’all ain’t cold?”

“Nah, I’m good. I’m used to flying at high altitudes through wet clouds all day. I don’t get cold that easily.”

“Yeah, well I’m not. The least they could go is give us a blanket or somethin’.”

“Just try to think about something else. What was up with that weird box thingy Applebloom had?”

“Ah honestly have no idea. Although to be honest, Ah remember that police officer talking into a box earlier. It’s just all too much to take in at once.”

“Yeah, the sooner we get out of here the better,” Rainbow Dash agreed, “I’m just going to go ahead and contribute everything I don’t understand to pure bucking magic. That’s what works in Equestria.”

“Yeah, Ah guess. Maybe Applejack can explain it.”

“Doesn’t it get weird referring to her like that?”

“Like what, sugarcube?”

“You know, calling her Applejack?”

Applejack smiled, “It sure does. Ah expect everything’s jus’ gonna get more confusin’ from here on out.”

***

“How do you think Applejack and Rainbow Dash are doing?” asked Fluttershy.

“I’m sure they’re doing just swimmingly, my dear,” responded Rarity, “In hindsight, I think we picked correctly when we sent them. When it comes to thinking with a clear head, there’s no better among us than Applejack. And there is no braver pony in Equestria than our very own Rainbow Dash.”

“I sure hope they find the other Twilight soon!” said Pinkie happily, “I bet they will! I better start getting a party planned, just in case they come back soon. In fact, when Twilight wakes up, I’m going to throw the biggest party I’ve ever had! I’m going to invite Princess Cadence and Prince Shining Armor and Princess Celestia and Princess Luna and Zecora and Lyra and Bon Bon and Derpy and Braeburn and Background Pony #11 and…”

“Ok, dear,” interjected Rarity wearily, “I think we get the idea.”

Pinkie Pie made a motion as if she were zipping up her lips and sat quietly staring at Rarity. Rarity, in turn, did her best to ignore her. Fluttershy giggled slightly. It was never boring around Pinkie Pie.

The three mares sat back in their seats on the train. They had boarded a few hours previous on the ten o’clock train back to Canterlot station. Fluttershy sighed as she stared out the window. The scenery on this ride was always so pretty. She sometimes thought that she would ride the train just to watch the scenery go by. Rarity could usually keep herself entertained by gossiping or drawing more fashion designs, but Pinkie Pie could never sit still for long on such rides. Doing nothing was never one of her strong suits.

Rarity did her best to not pay attention to Pinkie staring at her, but it soon ground down her nerves. She needed a distraction.

“Speaking of Lyra Heartstrings,” she started, “Have either of you girls noticed how often she’s been over at Twilight’s house socializing? I haven’t really asked Twilight about it. A lady never asked about what isn’t her business, after all. I just hope they aren’t doing anything… uncivilized in there. Do you think…?”

“I think it’s cute…” Fluttershy asserted quietly. Rarity looked at her with a raised eyebrow, but did not press the issue.

“They’re not having sex, if that’s what you mean,” said Pinkie. Rarity flinched at the word ‘sex’.

“Then what are they doing?”

“Lyra is talking with Twilight about the world beyond the mirror. It’s like some kind of obsession of hers.”

“And how do you know that, dear?” asked Rarity curiously.

Pinkie smiled, “Oh, I have my ways…”

Rarity opened to mouth to ask what these ways were, but thought better of it.

“So, Fluttershy, what do…”

BANG!

The train rocked violently, shaking the girls out of their seats. Looking around, Fluttershy could see the other passengers were… wait, where were the other passengers? She usually kept to herself, so she didn’t even notice how weird it was that they were the only ones on that train car. Rarity waved down the attendant at the head of the car.

“I beg your pardon, sir, but can you tell us what the hay just happened?”

“We’re about to enter the Galloping Gorge, ma’am,” he responded in a bored voice, “There was probably a rock that rolled onto the track.”

“That was unlike any rock I’ve ever experienced…”

“What about Tom?” Pinkie interjected.

“Would you mind checking with the conductor?” continued Rarity, ignoring her, “I have a lot of orders I need to complete, so I really can’t afford to be delayed.”

The attendant rolled his eyes and swore under his breath. He walked lazily to the front car. With an annoyed glance behind him, he opened the door that connected the car they were in to the car in front of them. He was about to walk out and into the next car when he let out an audible cry.

They had been disconnected with the rest of the train!

“Hey!” he called back to the three mares behind him, “Did you…”

A pair of hooves grabbed him! He looked up in horror to see the shape of a dark robed stallion that had suddenly appeared in the open doorway. The stallion pulled at him with incredible might and flung him out of the moving train car onto to ground below.

By now the three mares had realized what was going on. They looked up in horror at the robed pony. He had a dark grey coat underneath his black robe, and on his head rested a dark brown fedora. He wasted no time, galloping up to the Ponyville ponies.

“If you don’t do as I say right now, you will die,” he stated in a gruff voice, “Follow me, quickly. Keep your heads down.”

The mares looked at each other questioningly. Rarity could feel that there was something not quite right with this stallion. As she opened her mouth to ask him a follow-up question, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie did as he said and followed him to the rear of the train car. Rarity groaned and followed suit. If they get us killed, I’m never forgiving them.

The stallion pushed open the door of the car with much effort. Even though the train was slowing down, the ground still sped along below them with alarming speed.

“Jump!” shouted the stallion.

Pinkie Pie jumped without another word. She formed a perfect cannonball in the air and giggled and she hit the ground rolling. Rarity looked with some fright below her. Under normal circumstances, she would have never attempted something so hazardous to her perfectly styled mane, but concern for her friends overrode these vapid concerns. She took a deep breath and jumped in a graceful arc.

“Go! Jump!” shouted the stallion at Fluttershy.

Fluttershy looked down at the ground below her and emitted a soft meep. She closed her eyes. The ground was moving so fast.

“Come on, move!”

“I… eek…can’t.”

The stallion groaned and grabbed a hold of Fluttershy. With a great thrust from his back legs, he threw both of them from the moving train. He rolled gracefully upon the ground, yet Fluttershy scrapped painfully upon the dirt and wooden tracks beneath her, coming to a very painful halt. Rarity and Pinkie galloped up to them, concern on their faces. Blood leaked out onto the desert floor beneath them as Fluttershy grasped at the severe scrapes on her body. Rarity had had enough – she wanted answers.

“Now can you tell us what…”

BOOOOMM! The train car they had just been on not seconds before burst in a hail of fire and shrapnel!

***

Applejack and Rainbow Dash had fallen asleep on the swinging bench upon which they had been seated. After all, they hadn’t slept since the night before Twilight was put in a coma. They had been able to stay awake while they had been moving, or when they were waiting nervously in the holding cell, but sitting still on the bench rocking back and forth became more than they could take. It had been especially hard on Rainbow Dash; she was used to working hard followed by napping hard. This had been the longest day she thinks she’d ever had.

Applejack stirred slowly out of deep sleep to a faint rumbling sound. Opening her eyes, she saw a rusty old carriage making its way down the dirt road toward the farmhouse. It was kind of like the one the police officer used, but larger with a bed in the back that was currently full of apples. The door on the right side swung open and out stepped someone who was very familiar to Applejack.

She looked almost exactly as AJ did. Blue jeans, white work shirt, brown Stetson, hair tied together at the end. The only difference was that this Applejack wore a dusty brown bomber jacket on top. She looked curiously at the two girls sitting at the porch and smiled in bemusement.

“So you’re the crazy, drunken Applejack Ah been hearin’ so much about?” she asked lightheartedly as she stepped up onto the porch.

Pony-AJ looked at her curiously, “Whatta y’all mean?”

“Well Granny Smith got a call that Ah was drunk and engaged in all sorts of debauchery last night. Lucky for me Ah was sittin’ at the table at the time or Ah might've got chewed out somethin' fierce. We all had assumed Filthy Rich mistook me for someone else, but Pinkie ran off like a crazy person after that.”

“Now that you mention it, Pinkie did tell us that. She bailed us outta jail this mornin’.”

“Jail? Now what where y’all doin’ runnin’ around drunk ruinin’ mah good name for?”

Pony-AJ looked down at Rainbow Dash. She was still sleeping even through the whole conversation.

“Uhm, well, ya see… we weren’t exactly drunk. Rainbow Dash was… well… she was naked.”

Human-AJ looked at her with disbelief, “Now what were y’all doin’ runnin’ around naked for?”

“Ah wasn’t naked, just Dash,” Pony-AJ blushed, “Ya see, where we come from, most of the time ya don’ really wear clothes. Nobody really told us that.”

Human-AJ threw back her head and laughed a loud, hearty laugh. She walked up and sat on the wicker chair sitting next to the swinging bench.

“Ya know, Ah wasn’t really sure whether y’all was tellin’ the truth to begin with, but nobody can make up a tale like that one. Besides,” she said, staring at Pony-AJ, “Ah’ve never seen anything quite like this. If Twilight hadn’t appeared last year, Ah would probably have gone in and yelled at Granny Smith for not tellin’ me about mah long lost twin.”

Pony-AJ let out a sigh of relief. She could feel that Applejack would be willing to help them.

“You’re lucky, ya know?” continued Human-AJ, “Ah might’ve throttled ya right here myself if Ah found out y’all was runnin' around showin’ off mah goods around town. Though Ah must say, Ah’m kinda sorry Ah missed the show…”

She looked over at the sleeping Rainbow Dash with a strange look in her eye. Maybe it was because she was so similiar, but Pony-AJ knew exactly what she was thinking. She looked at her with shock. What? Human Applejack is…?

“Wait a second…” said Pony-AJ, her eyes wide with disbelief, “Are y’all tellin’ me you’re a… fillyfooler?”

The other Applejack raised an eyebrow.

“If y’all are callin’ me a lesbian, and I’m assumin’ that’s what y’all are sayin’, then no. Ah don’t get out much, alright? Ah work hard, Ah do my share for both the farm and mah family. Ah don’ really have time for romance or any of that stuff. A girl can crush on who she wants, when she sees who she wants, ya know what Ah mean?”

Pony-AJ thought about this. True, like the human version of herself, she didn’t spend a lot of time thinking about love. When she was a filly going to school, there was a colt or two that she crushed on, but there’s never been anypony she’s ever thought of as more than that.

“Then why did y’all say that about Rainbow?”

“Didn’t ya hear me? Ah said Ah like who Ah like. Your Rainbow Dash ain’t the only one in town, ya know. It’s kind of hard to explain… Look, we can talk about this later if you really want. Ah like Rainbow Dash, just not this Rainbow Dash. Damn, that sounds strange to say.”

“Applejack,” Pony-AJ responded with a smile, “This is all strange.”

“Tell me about it. Ya have no idea how odd it feels lookin’ at you right now. It’s kinda weirdin’ me out, actually. Anyway, Ah bet y’all are starved. How ‘bout ya wake up your sleepin’ buddy there and we all get some good old fashioned country breakfast?”

“That sounds awesome.”

Both Applejacks looked down at the figure on the bench. Rainbow Dash lay in the same position she had been, but with one eye cracked slyly open. She slowly sat upright and stretch out her arms above her head.

“Uhh… Were you listening to our whole conversation? How long’ve you been up?” asked Human-AJ nervously.

“Since you mentioned food. What are we waiting for? Let’s go get some grub.”

Rainbow Dash jumped off the bench and led the two other girls inside the house as if she lived there. Pony-AJ looked at her counterpart trying to wordlessly convey apology. She got a smile in return, and she knew exactly what that meant – Rainbow Dash is Rainbow Dash, no matter what world she was in.

Sitting on the furniture in the living room was the rest of the Apple family. They all looked up with trepidation at the two Applejacks entering their home. Before any of them could say anything, however, Human-AJ explained.

“Now Ah know what y’all are thinking, and Ah understand. It’s outright freaky having two of us here, but Ah’m telling you right now, there’s a good reason. However, right now they’re our guests and we’re gonna give ‘em a taste of Apple family hospitality. What say y’all help me cook up a real country breakfast?”

“I don’t know if I’m goin’ crazy or senile, but I’m not about to let anybody go hungry in my house. But I do expect an explanation later,” agreed Granny Smith proudly as she shuffled off into the kitchen.

“Applebloom, why don’t y’all keep our guests company while Big Mac here cooks up his famous apple flapjacks?”

“Eeyup.”

Big Mac followed Granny Smith into the kitchen as the younger girl grunted without commitment. Human-AJ, not seeming to noticed, went to help the rest of her family in the kitchen. A period of unpleasant silence followed with only the sounds of cookware rattling in the kitchen to break the din. Applejack and Rainbow Dash sat on the couch across from Applebloom, who was trying her best to avoid their gaze. The sheer level of discomfort eventually became too much for Applejack, so she thought she’d engage in some pleasant conversation to put the girl at ease that they were just your average, easygoing people.

“So… ya every have trouble with them hand things?” she asked Applebloom pleasantly, “Cause I tell ya, half the time I jus’ stick everything in mah mouth so Ah can actually keep a hold of it.”

“I know, right?” agreed Rainbow Dash, “I mean, first you have to balance on your hind legs, then you can’t even fit anything in your tiny snout. I don’t know how these hu-manes do it.”

“You’re joking, right?” Applebloom responded with a slight sneer.

“What?”

“Are y’all making fun of me?” she asked angrily.

Applejack was taken aback. She was expecting for everyone to be confused, but not hostile. She looked over at Rainbow Dash for some help, but she seemed to be more interested in the smells and sounds coming out of the kitchen.

“Nah, Ah’m not making fun of ya. I’m jus’ tryin’ to be friendly is all.”

“Don’t bother. Ah don’t know whatcha did to make my sister believe you, but Ah know if there’s obvious and suspicious folk about, then there’s probably somethin’ obvious and suspicious goin’ on.”

“Applebloom, Ah can explain…”

“Don’t bother. Just do what you came to do, but Ah’ll be keepin’ an eye on you.”

Applejack stammered, temporarily unable to form words in her head.

“Soups on, everybody!” called a voice from the kitchen. Rainbow Dash jumped from the couch and in one bounding stride dived into a kitchen seat. Applejack was more restrained, but she couldn’t deny how hungry she was, either. Applebloom watched her with suspicion as she sat down at the table next to Rainbow Dash.

“Y’all ain’t gonna join us?” asked Pony-AJ to the human family sitting around her with empty plates.

“Don’ worry about us none, sugarcube,” replied her counterpart, “We ate earlier this morning. It is about ten after all. Jus’ go ahead an’ eat up. You can tell us everything that’s going on afterward.”

Rainbow Dash didn’t even bother listening to the conversation. She was already eyeing her food with a ravenous desire. All her favorites were there, including pancakes and maple syrup, hash browns, toast, apple butter, apple strudel and apple juice. There were two things she didn’t recognize though – a cup of black liquid and thin brown strips. She chose to ignore those and ate like a starving child. AJ wasn’t far behind. They poured syrup greedily onto their pancakes and dunked their toast into the apple butter. Rainbow Dash dove face first into the plate, swallowing the food so fast she barely lifted her head up. Applejack tried to be a little more presentable. She knew that humans typically used their hands for everything, so she figured that would hold true to food as well. She picked up a syrup-laden pancake with her bare hand and took a nervous bite out of it.

“Uhm… y’all ain’t gonna use utensils?” asked Applebloom with a raised eyebrow.

They looked up, Dash's face still in her plate. Applejack blushed slightly and gently sat down her pancake. So that's was what those metal things were for...

“I’m good!” cried Rainbow as she continued gobbling up the food on her plate. Applejack tenuously picked up the knife in her fist and speared a pancake uncertainly. She was suddenly aware of all the people sitting around them watching them.

“Don’t worry about it, y’all,” said Human-AJ, “There’ll be time later to worry about niceties like proper fork use. Just don’ let Rarity see you do that.”

Applejack didn’t need any more convincing. She dropped the knife and finished eating her food along with Rainbow. All except for the strange black drink and brown strips.

“What’s this?” Rainbow asked, poking at the strips with her finger.

“That there’s bacon. Y’all never had bacon in the pony world?”

“Nope,” responded Pony-AJ, “What is it?”

“Jus’ eat it. It’s good.”

She picked up the bacon strip with some trepidation. Both Applejack and Rainbow Dash bit off a small piece. Their reactions couldn’t have been more different.

“This is uh… good,” stated Applejack with a half-hearted smile, “It’s kinda salty, though. And greasy.”

“This. Is. So. Cool!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed as she downed piece after piece, even finished Applejack’s share. Everyone else in the room looked at her with shock and amusement and she grabbed the drink she hadn’t touched before.

“Is this like bacon too?” she asked. Before anyone could answer her, she downed the whole cup in almost one gulp.

“No, that’s coffee,” Human-AJ responded as Rainbow Dash finished Applejack’s cup too, “Ah wouldn’t drink that much, though. You’ll probably be awake for the next two days with that much.”

Human-AJ and Big Macintosh exchanged looks. After a few moments, Rainbow’s pupil’s contracted and she began shaking uncontrollably in her seat.

“You ok, there, sugarcube?”

“Dear Celestia, this stuff is awesome. I feel like I could buck million clouds in a minute. No, in ten seconds flat. You got any more of this coffee, huh? Do ya? Do ya?”

“Uhm, Ah think y’all had enough,” Human-AJ responded, “Besides, Ah think y’all owe me an explanation about why you’re here and what’s going on with Twilight.”

The rest of the family looked expectantly at the two pony-girls. Applejack sighed. This was going to be a long story.

Comments

[Shimmering Honor]

I am liking this... it is really funny, cant wait till they find out where bacon comes from. keep it up buddy

[Shimmering Honor]

3416051 If you need any help with the Human sex scenes, I can offer assistance there. I have had some experience writing that in the past...(nervous grin)

[aCB]

3437952
Thanks, I'm glad you like it. Believe it or not, I intend to make Rainbow Dash's love of meat a whole story arc.

3437962
I might take you up on that. I don't usually write sex scenes. As I (think) I said below, I'm an asexual and such things really don't come naturally to me. I'm going to try to write it myself just to try to get my writing out of my comfort zone, but I'm definitely going to need someone to look over it before I publish it. It probably won't be coming for a couple weeks, though.

[Shimmering Honor]

3438011 I have a file on Gdocs that is said story if you want to have a look over that... just PM me mate and I will see what I can do

[aCB]

3438493
Thanks. I'll let you know when I get to that point.

[Shimmering Honor]

3438552 aye aye bud, like I said just PM me