Mare-y Stories to Tell in the Dark.

by BillytheBrony

Me, Myself, and I

Me, Myself, and I

“So anyways, this story is about a friend of my sister.” Pinkie Pie started, “She heard it from her friend’s cousin’s brother’s uncle who once visited Manehatten and worked as a psychologist.”

Rarity’s eyebrows raised slightly. “Pinkie, You know a psychologist?” She asked in surprise.

“I’m sure he’d have a field day with her.” Rainbow muttered with a roll of her eyes.

“So ANYWAYS,” Pinkie cut off further conversation with a wide-eyed stare, “Here’s how the story goes.”

Date: Thirteenth of February

Time: 11:30 AM

Subject Name: Cheddar Wheel

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Subject seems to exhibit signs of severe paranoia and insomnia. The subject often complains that he cannot get to sleep. When he does finally manage, his sleep is troubled and he often wakes up shortly after. The primary complaint are his ‘roommates’ that stay up talking to him and constantly badger him with their questions. I shall have to have a talk with them during their sessions in order to see if they can let Mr. Wheel get some sleep. It’s for the good of everypony, after all. I have been trying to pinpoint the exact cause of my patient’s problem but so far he has not told me anything pertinent. Further observation will be required.

Date: Eighteenth of February

Time: 11:30 AM

Subject Name: Swiss Army

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Subject seems to exhibit signs of Attention Deficit Disorder and blackouts. The subject’s eyes constantly shift around the room, and he mutters to himself while I am talking. Getting him to focus on me is quite the task. He has not shown any problems trying to sleep as he tends to be one of the agitators to Mr. Wheel’s condition. I have tried asking him to quiet down and let Mr. Wheel sleep, but he only responds with ‘If he sleeps, Muenster will get him.’ I do not understand fully what this means, but I shall have to talk with him further about this. He has also given me little to work with concerning his problems and what their source might be. Further observation will be required.

Date: Twenty-First of February

Time: 1:24 PM

Subject Name: Muenster

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Subject shows extreme signs of rage issues and sadomasochism. Subject showed up late for his appointment covered with cuts and bruises and in a straitjacket, as when the orderlies finally hunted him down he was in a linen closet with a razor he had somehow acquired. Subject is most uncooperative with my research and often threatens me and all that I love with harm. I must seriously consider some way to put him into isolation. So far he has yet to actually hurt his roommates but I fear it is only a matter of time before his desires get the better of him. Further observation will be required.

Date: First of March

Time: 11:30 AM

Subject Name: Cheddar Wheel

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Subject came in just fine today.. I suspect his previous medical training and use of medical magic is to thank for this. I wonder if maybe that is why I never see any cuts on him or Swiss despite being Muenster’s roommate. I shall have to investigate this further. Regardless, Mr. Wheel opened up to me today. He told me about when all of this started for him. He used to work at a hospital in Manehatten when somepony brought in a critically injured pegasus. Sadly, healing magic is just as reliable as traditional medicine, and the patient was unable to be saved. Mr. Wheel was racked with guilt. He could not sleep or eat for the longest time. Eventually he overcame the ordeal. Loss is always hard; as a doctor I empathize with this and can relate, though I have never lost any of my patients to death before. He seems unwilling to digress further about this matter. I should not push him and instead give him some extra time in the rec room as a reward for being open with me. Further observation will be required.

Date: Fourth of March

Time: 11:30 AM

Subject Name: Swiss Army

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Subject showed up on time as always, yet getting him to talk is a bit more challenging than with the others. His blackouts seem to be the cause of that. Sometimes I see him black out right in the middle of a sentence, then continue again unhindered after several minutes. He claims it was due to a severe head injury sustained while performing weather duties. Subject states he was assisting in moving clouds when a back draft caught him and slammed him into a building, causing severe head trauma and minor brain damage. I believe that this might be indicative of some deeper psychological wound he is not willing to admit to. But I also gave him a small reward for his co-operation. He is allowed some extra TV time during break.

Date: Twelfth of March

Time: 2:13 PM

Subject Name: Muenster

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Subject once again required a straitjacket in order to be brought in for discussion. He also mentioned how he’d like to find my wife and plow her. Such vulgarity. He is as always a difficult pony. Any time I try and ask him about his past, he gives me a spiel about being some famed murderer that killed hundreds or some such rubbish. None of his stories match up with any such news reports, no matter how far back I search in the archives. He is just making it up. He once again was covered with cuts and bruises, and I worry more and more for the safety of his ‘roommates’. I shall have to investigate to see if he is in fact causing them harm and Mr. Wheel is just using his magic to heal them as I suspect he is.

Date: Fourteenth of March

Time: 12:30 PM

Subject Name: Cheddar Wheel

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Subject was an hour late due to having actually been asleep when the orderlies went to fetch him. He would not wake up, so I authorized an hour delay. He was awake again by the time they came back for him. When asked about what caused him to actually be asleep, he responded that he was having a dream. It was about his time in medical school when he first met the mare of his dreams, Parmesan, a foreign exchange student from Rone. He told me that he loved the way she wore her mane up in pigtails and how she always smelled like tomatoes and wheat. Her family apparently ran a pizzeria back home, and she knew a thing or two about pizzas. I found out that pizzas were the subject’s favorite food, and he often would spend hours talking to the lunch lady about adding pizza to the menu.

Date: Twentieth of March

Time: 11:30 PM

Subject Name: Swiss Army

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Subject was almost eager to get out of his room today. When asked about this he stated that Muenster was especially scary last night. Apparently Mr. Wheel had almost fallen asleep and Muenster had almost ‘gotten’ him for good. I decided to ask Mr. Army about his cutie mark, a swiss army knife. When asked he responded with a detailed story about how as a young colt he was always handy with tools. One day while he was working on a windmill in his hometown he broke one of his important tools. He eventually figured out a way to use a different tool for the same purpose, and thus his cutie mark appeared. I am frankly surprised he remembered so much about his past, but took this as a good sign that I was making progress.

Date: First of April

Time: 11:30 AM

Subject Name: Muenster

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Subject showed up for once without any need for coercion and completely on time. He was even completely unharmed! This made me suspicious due to the date. But I decided to go along with it in case I caught him in a good mood. He was still vulgar and talked about anything but his past. But I managed to find out that he prefers the color blue and is fond of the band Wyld Stallions. Though his tastes in books seemed a bit archaic. I had never even heard of half the books he mentioned; apparently he is an avid reader when he gets the chance. I should send him some books from the library for him to read when he’s not feeling quite so masochistic.

Date: Twentieth of April

Time: 11:30 AM

Subject Name: Cheddar Wheel

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Audio Interview -

“Now Cheddar, may I call you Cheddar?”

“Of course, Doctor.”

“Excellent, may I get you some water? You seem very thirsty.”

“Thank you, Doctor.”

“Please, call me Robert, or Rob. How have you been sleeping lately, Cheddar?”

“About the same as usual, Doc....Rob.”

“I see, the sleeping medication not working?”

“No.”

“Alright, I’ll have to look over the dosage. In the meantime, let’s talk more about you. I want to help you find yourself, Cheddar.”

“I’m not lost, Dr. Otomy. I’m perfectly aware of my current location and what is going on. You just won’t listen to me.”

“Ah yes, your ‘roommates’ and their constant bickering. I assure you I am doing everything in my power in order to help you. But first you must help me.”

“Very well, Doctor. What do you want to hear?”

“Tell me about the second patient you had. Your last patient before you were, ah, committed here.”

“Very well. He was an earth pony, and when they wheeled him in he was covered with horrendous cuts and lacerations. He had lost so much blood I wasn’t even sure where to start. I tried my best to heal the major injuries and wounds first to stop any sort of fatal bleeding out. But the worst part...”

“What? What is it, Cheddar? What happened?”

“The worst part was that he woke up halfway through surgery. He gave me this look, this, horrible look.”

“What kind of look was it, Cheddar?”

“He looked like he was enjoying himself, Doctor. He woke up while I was healing him and then he started laughing. An insane, crazed laughter that caused his wounds to reopen. He died in the middle of a laugh, gurgling in his own blood. Right there in my hooves.”

Subject had to be escorted out due to a mild breakdown caused by extreme grief.

Date: First of May

Time: 11:30 AM

Subject Name: Swiss Army

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Audio Interview -

“Now then, Swiss, may I call you Swiss? I am glad you are here. How is your head feeling?”

“My head? My head feels fine, it feels light as air, Woooooosh!”

“That is good, have you been sleeping well?”

“Oh no, Doctor. Not at all.”

“Please call me Robert, or Rob. Or Bobby if it will make you feel better.”

“Alright, Bobby, hee that’s a funny name.”

“Now now, please settle down, Swiss. I want to talk to you about your past.”

“Awwww, do we have to? My head always hurts when I think about stuff like that.”

“Well then, will you talk with me about Muenster?”

“.....”

“Does Muenster scare you?”

“.....”

“Muenster can’t hurt you, you know that right?”

“You don’t get it, Doc. If I talk, Muenster will get me. He knows where I sleep. He’s always there, lurking, waiting for a chance for me or Cheddar to lower our guards.”

“Has he threatened you two?”

“No, he doesn’t have to. He’s scary, just the look in his eyes. It’s why I always keep Cheddar awake. If he lets his guard down. Muenster will get him.”

“Now, Muenster can’t possibly ‘get’ either of you two. You must realize this.”

Patient was silent for the rest of the interview.

Date: Fifth of May

Time: 3:48 PM

Subject Name: Muenster

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Audio Interview -

Interview unhelpful, patient was belligerent and communicated solely in profanities.

Final Report

Date: Fourth of June

Subject(s): Cheddar Wheel, Swiss Army, Muenster.

Doctor: Robert Otomy

Subject suffers from MPD (Multiple Pony Disorder). He has extreme feelings of guilt for having let his two patients die, and in order to cope with this has created personalities of what he must feel they were like in life. As such, he often switches from one personality to another when his guilt overcomes him. Swiss Army was a pegasus who had died of a head trauma during a weather incident. I found his death records easily enough. As for the pony called Muenster, there were no records prior to his death. His only trace was a reported incident of an earth pony found slashed and beaten before dying on the operating table, just as Mr. Wheel had described. I have decided on a prescription and therapy regimen that I believe will help slowly remove the extra personalities and help Mr. Wheel overcome his guilt. As I write this, I am about to go down and give Mr. Wheel the news. I anticipate a positive response.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Doctor Otomy opened the door to Cheddar’s room. He ducked slightly as the door was on the smallish side. He had a clipboard levitated in front of him as he glanced around the room, spotting the hunched over form of Cheddar sitting on his bed with a blanket around his shoulders. The yellow unicorn’s reddish mane and tail were a mess due to constantly tossing and turning in bed while trying to sleep. His eyes were almost hollow and unseeing as he stared at the floor in front of him. He had few moments of competent lucidity, and even then they were short-lived. He slowly raised his head when he detected the doctor’s entrance.

“Is it time for another interview?” He said in a slow, unsteady tone of voice.

“No, I came to tell you I have figured out a treatment that should help cure you of your multiple personalities.” Robert spoke quietly, afraid to spook the poor unicorn.

“Personalities? No, you don’t get it.” He said as he shook his head, a small sad frown crossing his face as his eyes teared up. The air in the room suddenly got colder.

“Wh, what do you mean?” He asked, looking around as he wondered why the thermostat had been turned down. The door slammed shut behind him, causing him to jump and spin around. He found himself staring face to face with another pony he’d never seen before. This pony had dark red fur with a matted steel blue mane that was sticking out at odd angles. His eyes were bright green, almost lime. His cutie mark was that of a strait razor. “Who are-”

“HiYA Doktur!” garbled out the earth pony as a hoof struck the doctor full on, knocking him down to the ground as he gasped for breath. “Ya RemEMber Me, Ya?” The pony’s voice was altering from high and low tones. His eyes often looking in opposite directions every now and then, as if focusing on two separate things. Robert struggled to rise to his hooves, but found himself swiftly meeting the floor. He felt like his chest had collapsed in and he could feel something wet and warm bubbling up his throat. He coughed for a few moments as blood splattered out. Cheddar was now standing next to him.

“You have a punctured lung. I’m so sorry.” He said as tears were already rolling down his cheeks.

“You should have listened, Bobby,” came another voice. This one was a pegasus who was hiding in the corner. The pony had bright blue fur and white mane and tail. His cutie mark, of course, was a swiss army knife with various ends sticking out of it. Swiss looked at him fearfully. “Muenster gets everyone eventually.”

“No.” Robert shook his head. “This is a bad dream. You can’t be real. You both died. On the operating table!” The Doctor was slowly losing his grip on the world at being confronted with two honest to goodness ghosts.

“Ya DErn RIGht I’m DeAD. HaVE been FER YEARS!” Muenster chortled as another hoof impacted the Doctor’s face. “I alWASY Find a gOOd hoST afTER mY LasT ONE goes.” He smirked and brought his crazed smile even closer to the Doctor. “BEEn doiN This FER YEARS.” He repeated, raising a hoof up and bringing it down savagely.

Date: I DUNNO

TIME: DUNNO

SUBJEKT: DOKTUR ROB OTOMY

DOKTUR: MUENSTER

SUBjekt thiNKS HeS A BIG SMARty pants, an SUFFERs from a BIG CASE OF the MeaNY JERKFACES. TreATMEnt will HAVe ta BE SEVere or HE’LL NevER LeaRN.

After Pinkie was done, she turned to look at all of her friends. Who were in various stages of cowering behind something or somepony. “Well? A neat story huh?” She asked with a happy bounce.

“Pinkie. That, that was HORRIBLE.” Exclaimed Rarity as she brought a hoof to her forehead and fainted right then and there dramatically.

All she got out of Fluttershy was a squeak. Twilight was still trying to wrap her brain around what happened and couldn’t talk either. AJ opened her mouth to say something but Rainbow Dash had already zoomed over and was bouncing around.

“That. Was. AWESOME!” She said as she seemed to be having her own fit of laughter and bouncing. Soon she was joined by Pinkie Pie who was giggling as well.

“This explains so much, and so little.” Twilight said, looking between her hooves as if trying to figure something out.

“So who’s next?” Asked Applejack as she looked around. “Just Twilight and Dash, and Ah think Twi’s shut down fer now.”

“Oh I’ll totally tell a story. Don’t know if I can top that though.” Rainbow said with an elbow nudge to Pinkie, who responded with a giggle.

Comments

[Master Lyra]

HIya DocTA!

[The Bookieman]

Wow This was freaking creepy...and I loved it. The strongest so far in my opnion. There is one complaint but ill tell you personally later to avoid spoilers.

[Drakopony]

Wow now that one was very good

[Discontinued]

pinkie why u so awesome?