Arms & Hooves

by Gberg87

Second contact

The next day

"WAKE UP, WAKE UP!" Sniper kicked his snoring teammates.

"THERE IS A BLOODY FIRE! WAKE UP, YOU WANKERS!"

"w-w-wha?? Fire? Where?" Scout woke up wiping the sleep off his eyes only to be faced by a huge wall of flames "Ohh crap."

"JARATE!" Sniper yelled, the rest team simultaneously woke up in a hurry. They all ran into different directions hoping to flee from the splash of urine. When no sound of glass smashing accompanied with the warning, they realized that Sniper didn't actually throw his Jarate.

"This is no matter to joke about Sniper." Spy warned.

"Now that you're all awake, you can see that we have a BLOODY SERIOUS PROBLEM OVER HERE!" Sniper raised his voice pointing at the burning trees few meters away.

"Oh zis is not good." Said medic as he stared at the fire with the rest of his teammates.

"Don't just stand there. Everyone grab as much as you can and ruuuunn." Soldier ordered.

Everyone swiftly grabbed their weapons and hats. Pyro on the other hand stood still amidst the chaos awed by the huge flames. Seeing fire always brought joy to him somehow.

"Ye mute devil, i bet yer the one behind this." Said the Demoman as he pulled his teammate away from the fire.

With everything important in hand, they all ran towards the village.

The intense flames were eating out the forest at an unbelievable rate, the trees behind them collapsed as they got completely consumed by the fire. The concerned Medic had his medigun ready as he was running, in case some of them got hurt.

"Quickly guys, follow me." Scout hoped that the flames won't spread to the bare hill.

After minutes of tirelessly running, they finally made it to the top. Everyone was panting, especially Heavy. He laid flat on the grassy ground breathing loudly. He never ran this fast in his life before. If he dies now, there will be no respawn. It was like the old days, before he got hired by the administrator.

The hill provided them with quite the view of what Pyro had done. The flames outshone the raising sun. But something else was going on, something ... unnatural.
All of the clouds above the forest slowly gathered above the fire, they spread out to cover as much of the burning areas a possible. Where there wasn't flames, there where no clouds. Then it started raining.

Engineer, mouth agape, could only stare in amazement "Did you fellas see that?" Nobody seemed to hear him, they were all angrily glaring at Pyro.

"Pyro ye bloody devil, ye made me lose me last bottle o'scrumpy." Demoman was furious, he was about to strangle Pyro only to be stopped by Spy. "It might have been for ze best." Spy said calmly.

"Pyro, ve are no longer at war. hand over your veapons at once before you cause any more 'incidents' ." Medic forcefully took all of Pyro's fire toys: the degreaser, the flare gun, the detonator, twelve matchstick boxes, eight lighters, six boxes of fireworks, two incendiary grenades and a propane tank. he threw most of them off the hill.

Engineer continued to stare. What he is witnessing was not the work of nature. This forest had a scary aura, it is cursed he can feel it. But his teammates seem to ignore this.
"Why are y'all acting like you didn't see what just happened, the cursed forest is trying to put itself out."

"Hahaha." laughed the Soldier "We have fought robots, magicians, ghosts, zombies and a shirtless man, i don't know what surprises me anymore. Now enough chitchat, let's march to that village."

"But, but there is no scientific explanati-"

"Shut up maggot."

---

'i hate early morning disasters.' Rainbow Dash though as she flew towards Town Hall. All weather pegasi in ponyville held an emergency meeting concerning a recent fire in the Everfree forest. She Could see its brightness in the horizon, along with the raising sun.

Rainbow Dash entered the building expecting to see alot of worried ponies. To her disappointment there were only five pegasi.

"What? Were is the rest? I thought this was a 'serious' disaster."

"Glad to see you came Rainbow Dash. It seems that nopony takes a fire in everfree forest seriously, they'd rather keep sleeping." Sunny Rays said.

"I wouldn't too, because the forest usually takes care of itself. But this time something is different, according to our observations the forest doesn't have enough water in its clouds. And if we don't do something the fire will spread and eventually consume ponyville." Thunderlane added with a shudder.

"Don't we usually make it rain to extinguish fires?" Derpy asked

"We can't control the clouds above the forest so it will be impossible to put it out the way we usually do." Cloudchaser replied.

"Maybe we can throw buckets of water over the fire." Derpy suggested.

"Don't be silly that's too slow and ineffective. Besides the fire is too big." Flitter said.

"Derpy, what are you even doing here? you are a mailpony." Sunny Rays facehoofed.

"We have to think of something serious. Any ideas ?" Thunderlane said.

Everypony fell in deep thought. They were all silent for a minute until Rainbow Dash decided to speak. "The forest needs fire to put itself out. So we have to feed it more water and it will handle the rest. There problem solved." She said smugly.

"Great idea RD." Thunderlane replied enthusiastically.

"So how are you going to feed the forest more water?" Derpy asked, breaking the short silence.

"Well i haven't though of that yet." Rainbow Dash quickly replied.

"We use a Tornado." Everypony gasped and turned around. It was Mayor Mare, descending from the stairs. All eyes were locked on her as she put one hoof over another with extreme confidence.

"Yes you heard me right, and not just any Tornado. A water Tornado." She continued.

"B-But, lifting water with a Tornado requires more eight hundred horse power, we need a great amount of coordination and training before we even attempt that." Thunderlane said with a stutter.

"And we can't be too sure if that would even work. That's just a crazy suggestion Mayor. No offense." Flitter added.

"This isn't the first time that this happened, after all i've lived here for a long time. Once there was a fire in the everfree forest that got out of control. All of the pegasi in town got together to create a water Tornado and flung it towards the fire. The forest drank it all up and took care of the rest after that. I don't know how it exactly works since i was just a filly, but i can assure you it works."

"Thats great and all, but i am not sure we can achieve this in such short notice. There must be another way, maybe we should ask Twi or tell the princesses about this." Rainbow Dash said.

"There is no need to bother the princess, i have already contacted Cloudsdale and they are sending twelve experts to help you with the coordination and wing power. All you have to do is group as much pegasi as possible so we can get started."

"You really are prepared for everything Mayor Mare." Sunny Rays replied softly.

"It is my job to be. You best go now. The sooner we start the more chance we have to put it out."

Everypony nodded and immediately flew away.

---

"Agh finally, Heavy is tire. Is good to see we are close."

An hour had passed, they finally made it out of the forest. Suddenly, everything became surprisingly brighter. The grass, the sky, the sun ... There were flowers and butterflies everywhere.

"Alright boys, the village is Right over there. Now, We need to be very careful with our first conta-"

"HMMM, HMMMM!!" Pyro suddenly yelled in terror. He was pointing at a nearby cottage, where another Horse-like creature was pacing back and forth nervously. This one was yellow.

"Look, its another one of those sweet delicious candy horses." Soldier wet his lips with his tongue, "Ohhh i'd love to have its brains for breakfast."

"PHMMPHH, HMMHPHM!" Pyro screamed again still pointing at the horse.

"Mates Look! that thing has bloody wings. See, i told you they were not ponies."

"Heavy does not care about wings. Heavy want to make sandvitch out of tiny horse." Even though fat and juicy, the prey of last night wasn't enough to satisfy eight hungry mercenaries.

"hmmhphm, HMPHMMPH, HMMPHMM!"

"What the hell is wrong with you, Pyro. Stop screaming like a freakin' girl-... ohh."

"Alright mates, if you want to eat that beauty for breakfast." Sniper said, while Pyro was still screaming in the background like a lunatic. "We'll need to approach it from the forest where it can't see us. And Pyro, you better shut your blabbering mutant mouth or you'll scare it away."

Pyro nodded. He stayed alert and mumbled barely audible noises as if he was trying to calm himself down.

Everyone retreated to the forest, and slowly made their way near the cottage. The early morning sun provided them with long shadows, a good cover. Sniper got into position and aimed his rifle at the yellow creature's head. He focused on his shot, he could see more details of it.

It had a very stylized pink mane. Unlike the coat it had feathers on the wings. It also had what looked like a tattoo of butterflies on her rear. The eyes however were the most interesting part; they were sky-blue and they seemed to shine. He could feel that there is something more behind them, something deep and mesmerizing. These weren't normal eyes, just by looking at them Sniper could feel his heart melt away.

Is he going to murder this innocent creature to get breakfast? That would make him such a meany. He felt a crushing guilt that he never experience before in his life, not even before pulling the trigger on a human's head, not even before skinning those cubs to make a new hat, not even that one time when he put piss in Scout's drink. Just by looking at this creature's eyes, he felt not just guilty ... He felt ashamed. What did this cute creature ever do to him to deserve such fate. What would his mother think of him if she saw him mercilessly execute a harmless creat-.

"Just shoot it already." Medic was getting impatient.

"I-i can't. It's bloody doing something to my mind."

"Vhat? You are ze 'professional'. How can a little pony beat you."

'it's not a bloody pony' he mumbled.

"Comon Sniper, we're starvin' over here. Hurry it up."

Sniper Could feel the stares his teammates gave from behind, he sighed and readied his shot again; Crosshair on the head, preferably between the eyes, finger on the trigger... 'professionals don't have feelings.' Sniper told himself before the muscles of his finger slowly contracted and then ... BAM.

A fast blue blur swept across his scope, it took him by surprise. "What the?" he canceled his shot and lowered the scope to see what happened.

Pyro let out a panicked scream then quickly managed to silence himself.

It was another Another winged creature, a light blue one just appeared right in front of the yellow one. "It came out from bloody nowhere."

"Whoaw, a Rainbow Flying horse. Cool." Scout cheered.

"Alright Doctor, what did ye put in me drink this time? Why am i seeing rainbow horses all of the sudden?"

"This place just keeps getting weirder n' weirder" Mumbled the Engineer, mostly to himself.

"HAHA this is great. Forget the yellow one, we'll leave it for lunch, this new one is much better. I wonder if it has a rainbow brain as well."

"For ze last time Soldier. Eating raw brains only gives you bad infections."

"Private! What are you waiting. Shoot it!"

"Nah mate, i am not shooting it."

"Why the hell not?" asked Scout.

Sniper motioned Scout to come look at them from the scope.

"See what they are doing? Don't call me crazy, i am sure that these two are arguing about something. These things can talk, they are not just animals."

"buhahahahha. Sniper thinks tiny pony food talks. Is funny."

"Why don't you hop in and see for yourself, mate?"

The two creatures were arguing, the gestures and the expressions they used are very human like. Scout guessed that these creatures might be sentient.

"He's right, Heavy. Their lips move as if they are talkin' and they use the same body language we do. That would explain why it's near a cottage, maybe it lives there." Scout's eyes were widened from amazement.

"Spy maybe ye could sneak up on 'em. See if there is anything ye could understand." Demoman finally suggested something useful.

"Of course. Sounds like a great plan." Spy was already invisible when he replied.

He slowly walked out of the forest and towards to cottage. He hid under a small bridge that was right in front of the tiny building. His teammates could only observe from a distance.

Few minutes later the blue pegasus just flashed out of the scene, it flew off with incredible speed, maybe even faster than Scout after he drinks his boink. The yellow pegasus went inside the cottage.

"Gentlemen." Spy decloacked right behind his teammates without any warning.

"Quickly, Spy tell us what you got." Scout asked eagerly.

"I am afraid this place is more ridiculous than we first though." Spy sighed and continued. "The village we're after is named 'Ponyville', and this entire world is populated by these talking ponies, and they all luckily speak English."

As soon as Spy mentioned 'Ponyville' everyone around him chuckled, trying to hold their laughter so that Spy could continue.

"ah, ahahha. I told you sniper, I told you zese are ponies." Said the medic.

"the blue pony is called 'Rainbow-Dash'. And the yellow pony is called 'Fluttershy'."

What followed was a chain reaction of laughter that even Spy couldn't withstand. Scout held his sides while Soldier was wiping tears of his eyes and Heavy was continuously slapping his knees.

Pyro however did not share their laughter. He was just laying on the dirt, grabbing his legs to form a ball and he was rambling more than usual.

" *snort* *snort* But wait there's even more." Spy could barely hold a serious face while continuing "They are going to put out the forest fires with a... with a TORNADO, because they 'cannot control the clouds above the Everfree forest' ahahahahahaahaha *snort*."

The team's laughter was soon interrupted by a loud high pitched scream. Everyone turned around to see that it was 'Fluttershy'. They must have made too much noise.

The pony was clearly terrified at the sight of the humans that it froze in screaming. And Pyro was more terrified at the sight of the pony so close and screaming at them that he lost what little sanity he had and gave another ear-piercing scream. The shock of the encounter froze both of them in a yelling battle which rendered the rest of the team half deaf.

"Someone please make it stop!" Spy begged covering his ears.

"Pyro, I've had enough of your Scheiße." Medic, furious, pulled out a large syringe and thrust it into Pyro's neck putting him to sleep once again. Meanwhile 'Fluttershy' immediately flew off, very terrified.

"No wait, don't go. We come in peace, i promise i wont eat your brain. Please come back. Pleaaaaase." Soldier yelled from a distance, which made the pony fly even faster.

"Damn it, now i will never eat its brain."

Medic got even more furious, he turned to soldier "I swear,i f you try to eat another pony, or even talk about eating ponies. I vill saw off your tongue."

"Ehhh, hehe ... sorry doc." He replied while scratching the back of his neck.

"That was quite the first impression there mates." Sniper said sarcastically. "Now please tell me what the bloody hell is wrong with Pyro."

"I have no idea!" Medic replied "I am going to keep him sleeping, until i find a suitable place to perform my examination."

"Or we could just kill him. I never liked the mute freak in the first place." Scout suggested bluntly.

"No, Pyro is good friend. He save heavy from sneaky spy many times." Heavy waved his hand defensively, "Pyro is part of team. We protect Pyro, not kill him."

"Lads, we need to focus on our next step. Let's go to that village now, tell 'em we come in peace. Before that pony makes things worse." Demoman seemed to make more sense since he lost that bottle of scrumpy.

"See, i told you it was for ze best, Demoman." Spy added.

"Ah agree. But before we go we'all need someone to speak for our behalf. Spy did a hell of a job with Mr.Hale back on Mann.co, he is the best diplomatist we got." Engineer talked proudly of Spy, he was still grateful for his handiwork.

"да, Spy is sneaky good liar."

"It would be my pleasure. And I'll take that as a compliment Heavy." Spy smiled, but then he wore a warning glare and locked his eyes on Soldier. "Just make sure nobody mentions anything about eating ponies, or starting a fire."

Soldier nodded with a smile.

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