Tipsy Wubs

by Bigbigbig

I don't have a problem

“VINYL!” Octavia screamed, despite the close quarters of a two bedroom apartment.

“Meh-what?” Vinyl asked, clearly not paying attention to Octavia. Vinyl swings away from her computer in her chair and pulls her headphones off her head. “What you *HICCUP* need?” Vinyl sayed, looking at Octavia through her (now foggy) purple shades.

“Well I don’t need anything, but you have a serious problem!” Octavia snarled. Vinyl looks at Octavia with confused eyes not sure if Octavia is kidding or just being a bitch.

“What in the Star-spangled fuck are you talking about Octavia? I’m don’t *HICCUP* have a problem.” Vinyl giggled, grabbing her half empty can of Buckwiesr and gulping it down.

“That right there is the problem Vinyl!” Octavia hissed as she bitch slaps the can out of vinyl’s grasp. (Not that hard since ponies don’t have, well, hands.) “You don’t have any control and drink yourself to an even more reckless state.” Octavia exclaimed.

Vinyl stood up from here chair now furious because her beverage is not within reaching distance. “Octavia, I know I drink a lot but that is no reason to throw mah beer.” Vinyl slured. “Besides, *Hiccup* I am not a reckless drunk.” Vinyl stammered as she tries to walk towards Octavia, but only to find out that Octavia was spinning around the room and Vinyl soon face planting into the coffee table in the living room. Have no fear, for Vinyl’s head is strong enough for any wooden foe and smashes right through the unsuspecting table.

“VINYL!” Octavia cried out. “Are you ok you damned idiot?” she asked as she runs over to check on vinyl.

“I win!” Vinyl yelled, trying to play off her fall as some sort of challenge towards the wooden opponent, she doesn’t foal her roommate in any way.

“This is what I am talking about Vinyl.” Octavia scolded but not without a hint of worry. “This the fourth time this week that you have been drinking too much and hurting yourself.” Octavia stood and headed to the bathroom for the frequently used first-aid kit. She comes back and looks over Vinyl’s injuries. Octavia hunched over Vinyl looking over the drunken pony and her injuries. Vinyl looked into Octavia's eyes, looking deep within OCtavia till Vinyl is feeling something in her gut. Vinyl then lounges forward and kisses Octavia on the lips, only to have her head slammed back into the floor.

“What the fuck Vinyl!” Octavia yelled while getting up.

“Sorry.” Vinyl sayed. “This just reminds me of those dirty stories that you tell me not to read on HumFiction.”

“Vinyl you are drunk, go to bed.” Octavia sayed obviously not worried about Vinyl’s cuts now.

“Ah, come on Tavi, you know that you liked it.” Vinyl teased.

“I knew reading those fics would give you bad ideas when you are drunk.” Octavia stated as she walks to here room ready for bed after Vinyl’s jokes. Vinyl does the same but not before she glazes over the mail Octavia brought in earlier that day.

“Bills, Bills, Bills, Ad for Viagra, Some personal letters for Octavia.” Vinyl said aloud but not enough for Octavia to hear. Something catches her eyes, a letter addressed for Octavia. “A Pamphlet for Alcoholics Anonymous?" Vinyl asked confused. "What a bunch of fucking losers!” Vinyl laughed. She comes to the conclusion that the AA must have just sent it the wrong pony. With a good laugh Vinyl headed for bed but not before she vomits in the bathroom.

The next day Vinyl woke up earlier than she had ever waken up in about a week. “Damn this hangover, making me wake up before 3 pm.” Vinyl said as she slides out of bed, not using her legs because that would require effort. Octavia walks into her room with a smug smile on her face.

“Oooooooooh vinyl!” Octavia sang at a rather annoying high pitch. Vinyl covers her head with her pillow that followed her slump down to the ground and moans from the headache.

“I get it Octavia now shut the hell up.” Vinyl pleaded. Octavia trots to Vinyl’s side and removes the pillow. Vinyl looks up to her and tried to smile. “Go away can’t you see I’m sleeping.” Now playing with the pillow, Vinyl and Octavia stumble out of Vinyl’s room and into the living room/kitchen. Vinyl soon regretted trying to be more playful as she felt the full brunt of her hangover. “Ow!” Vinyl screamed. Octavia turns around and returned to her more caring self, observing Vinyl.

“Are you not feeling well vinyl? Maybe you should go lay back down.” Octavia said with a worry.

“Yeah, that is a good idea. Can you make me some coffee?” Vinyl said while holding her hoof to her temple.

“Sure thing, just remember we have to go to my bands 10 year anniversary party later tonight.” Octavia reminded Vinyl.

“Yeah Yeah, just wake me when you want to go.” Vinyl said as she invaded her bed once again to escape as her head explodes.

“Let us hope we can avoid any mishaps.” Octavia said under her breath as she started brewing the coffee. Octavia had a small frown on her knowing just how wild Vinyl could get around Alcohol.

Later that night Vinyl awoke to the smell of coffee and slightly less pounding head. She got out of bed (using her legs this time) to investigate.

“Oh good you are awake.” Octavia stated as she is setting the table for dinner. “I was going to wake you so we can have a little talk before we eat and then head to the party.”

“Sure thing Tavi, what about?” vinyl says as she falls into her chair at the end of the table.

“Well, you see Vinyl I think you should stay away from the alcohol tonight.” Octavia hastily said, knowing that Vinyl doesn’t like to talk about drinking when it involves limitations. “I was just thinking that lately you have been going overboard with the drinking and that you should really consider cutting back…a-at least for tonight.”

Vinyl looked at Octavia not want to hurt her feelings and said, “Sure thing Tavi, anything for you.” Octavia gives a breath of relief as Vinyl raised her hoof. “On one condition.” Vinyl said. “You have to stop giving me shit about drinking at home. OK?” Octavia looked over at Vinyl not wanting to tell her of the plans she had for Vinyl later that week, but agreeed to the terms. Octavia then handed Vinyl her coffee and they both eat their dinner.

Both ponies headed over to the party knowing their promises they made. The pones continued to walk until they reached what looked like an old opera house, because it was. “The Pony-Populous” Octavia said with a wide smile. “It is where my band mates and me had our first show. I even left my first Cello I played here in the trophy room.” Octavia said while she showed Vinyl the Cello behind the window on the front of the building. Vinyl looked at the old wooden instrument and back at Octavia. She was practically glowing, strange since she wasn’t pregnant to vinyl’s knowledge.

“This place has such a strange name Tavi. wh-” Vinyl scratch said as she was interrupted by Octavia.
“Don’t call me that name here! It is very embarrassing." Octavia ranted, "This building earned its name by accepting ponies from all walks of life, it is very famous for housing some of the best pony musicians of the last decade.” Octavia said angrily.

Vinyl looked at Octavia witha raised eye brow. “Well then why haven’t I played here?” Vinyl asked playfully, knowing it would poke some of Octavia’s buttons. Octavia simply frowned and walked inside to go meet her friends from her band, she ignored Vinyl. Vinyl soon followed going nowhere in particular, she tried to find a pony she might have a conversation with. Vinyl knew that was not going to happen however, because all she saw were spiffed up ponies dressed in nice attire, and bitchy looking ladies with sticks up their asses. (This is Vinyl’s thoughts not mine.) Vinyl soon found that dressed as she is with her fanciest dress and shoes she was out classed. Octavia had said that what she wore was fine, but Vinyl knew that was a lie.

After an hour Vinyl found the food and drink table. Tempted by the fine wines and other assorted adult beverages Vinyl back away remembering her promises she made. Vinyl might have wanted a drink, but being able to walk away saved her and her promise. Finding another corner to sit in she spotted Octavia. Octavia looked like she was having a great time with her old friends. Vinyl made a move to go join her, now that she may be calmed down from their little scuffle outside, only to be stopped by a waiter pony with an assortment of wines.

“Would you like to taste some of our finer wines miss?” The waiter asked handing Vinyl a small sample of wine.

Vinyl eyed the waiter pony sceptically. “You mean I don’t have to drink it?” Vinyl asked hopefully.

“Why of course young lady, we were paid to supply this party with our exquisite wines so that ponies may try some and purchase our wines.” The waiter said.

“All right!” Vinyl said as she grabbed the drink and throw it into her mouth. The flavor was intoxicating. A Mix of natural berries and a sturdy alcohol made Vinyl squee form just a taste. She lost all control and let the fine liquid slid down her throat. “Damn that’s good!” She said as she drank the ‘sample.’

“Miss you aren’t supposed to drink the sample.” The waiter said as he held up a waste container for the spit of the ‘privileged ponies.’

“No way!” Vinyl said grabbing another glass. “This shit is way too good not to drink.” Downing another shot of wine is a second. Vinyl then grabed the whole bottle and took a hearty gulp of the red liquid. “You have no idea how long I have been needing a drink.” She exhales as she dives back in for another chug. Vinyl was finally relaxed while she drank away. Some how drinking always made her feel better and less anxious.

Vinyl continues making an ass of herself until she is good and drunk. Now encumbered with the magical power of being drunk Vinyl became the funniest pony in the room. Telling jokes, making faces, and making accurate observations of the pony government. However, to every pony else she was just saying vulgar words in-between snickering, gagging, and what seemed like horrible racial slurs. Her faces are just Vinyl spiting on other ponies for not laughing at her obviously funny jokes and her flipping other ponies off. (With hooves? How does that work?)

Octavia finally finds out that Vinyl is being a complete asshat and rushed out of the main lobby to find her drunk friend. After plenty of time to get pissed at Vinyl for not only breaking a promise but being drunk as fuck, Octavia found Vinyl in the one place she didn’t want Vinyl. Near the display case at the front of the building.

“Hey guys check me out, I’m like *HICCUP* those guys in the band The Whoof.” Vinyl slurs as she has drawn a crowd. Vinyl was standing on the platform that once held Octavia’s prized cello. Octavia looked on in horror as saw what Vinyle was doing.

“No Vinyl!” Octavia screamed, but it was too late. Vinyl had Octavia’s cello in her hooves like she was playing a guitar. She soon switch the instrument to a lumberjack grip, holding the cello like an axe.

"FUCK THIS SHIT!" Vinyl yelled. With one drunken swing she smashed Octavia’s cello in half. Splinters flew in all directions showering the disgusted crowd in a hail of Octavia’s accomplishments. (Sad life for Octavia.) "Wooooooo thank you everyone, good night!" Vinyl screamed as she slumped on the pedestal. The crowd soon dispersed and looked in Octavia's direction.

Octavia stood there stunned by Vinyl’s brutish actions. She continued to stand there until she regained composer and walked to the now unconscious Vinyl on the trophy stand. Octavia grabbed Vinyl and throw her onto her back, not before Vinyl threw up of course, and left. As she walked through the front door many ponies gave a look that tore Octavia on the inside. However, she soldiered on and pretended not to notice. They took a cab knowing too well that Vinyl could not walk. Once home Octavia helped Vinyl undress before dropping her into bed. She then covered Vinyl in her covers and leaned in to tell Vinyl a secret. “Vinyl, you have a problem and I’m going to help you through it. So get some sleep and we will talk about it in the morning.” Octavia said while walking towards the door. Octavia then whispered, “You are total bitch sometimes.” Before slamming the door.

Author's Note:

Why you read dis? It is so bad.

Comments

[Tracer0311]

Well if your using the present tense, its not really telling a story. You should only use it to discribe a scene, not tell a whole story.

[Tracer0311]

I'd sugggest editing it to be in the past tense.

[Bigbigbig]

2980108 not sure what you mean. Can you be more specific please.

[Doc Crowl]

2980715 He's saying it should be described like a story being retold years later. It makes the fic seem sloppy if everything is in present tense.

[Doc Crowl]

Also, you put "Vinyle" in the description.

[Tracer0311]

2980715

Your telling the story as if you are watching it take place and announcing it. ie Octavia walks over to vinyl and says hi.

When telling a story it works better to use the past tense ie Octavia walked over to vinyl and said hi.

It flows better and is more common usage.

[Bigbigbig]

2980816 I see now thanks.

[Bigbigbig]

2980816 I changed it to past tense as much as I could. If you want maybe take another look and give me feed back. But i understand if you don't want to throw up any more today.

[Bigbigbig]

2980803 fixed that too you Nazi

[Tracer0311]

2981143

Your to hard on yourself, lol. Good job fixing it from what I've seen.

[Bigbigbig]

2981219 thank you and I know I'm hard on my self, but that is the only way I feel like I get better. Constant demoralization is something I can climb over, no biggy.

[Shadowclax]

CONTINUE IT!!!!!

[Nightshade Dawn]

Not bad for your first story I like drunk vinyl.