Armor's Game

by OTCPony

Tea, Cake and Espionage

“Oh, thank you for having us for tea, Twilight,” said Fluttershy. “Uh, if it’s not too much trouble...”

“It could never be, Fluttershy,” said Twilight. In the solar of her quarters in Canterlot Castle’s northeast tower, the seven of them enjoyed elevenses. Rarity delicately sipped tea, Applejack devoured an apple turnover, Pinkie Pie sampled an enormous slice of chocolate cake, and Spike crunched merrily on a plate of gems that the staff had thoughtfully brought.

“Not eating much, Rainbow?” asked Twilight. The Pegasus only had her tea cup in front of her.

“I’m in training, Twi. Winter Wrap Up’s gonna be coming up, and the racing season after that. Gotta keep in shape.”

Twilight watched as Applejack reached for another pastry. “AJ...”

“Yeah, Twilight?” grunted the Earth Pony though a mouthful of pie.

“What you said back there in the tower with Shining Armor... You said you didn’t want to interfere because you work on a farm! Why?!”

Applejack swallowed her turnover. “Well, why not, Twilight? Ah ain’t got all this fancy book-learning you an’ the Princesses have got. Hey, jus’ listen to me! There’s no way ah could say anything that one of the Princesses hasn’t thought of yet.”

“Applejack! What a ridiculous thing to say!” exclaimed Rarity.

“Well, Rarity, far as ah can tell, Princess Celestia’s been running this place for a thousand years, and heck, looks like it’s workin’ to me.”

Twilight looked down at her tea in disbelief. Applejack was one of the most dependable, hard-working and friendly ponies that she had ever met, and she could not believe that she would think so little of her own ability to contribute to the governance the nation.

“But, Applejack, you’ve voted, haven’t you?”

“‘Course ah have! Ah’ve always voted for Mayor Mare!”

“But not for Parliament?”

“Well, what’s the point, Twi? Ah reckon Princess Celestia’s got a much better idea of how to run Equestria than a few hundred ponies who’ve never even seen half of what she’s seen!”

“Well, what about you, Pinkie?” asked Rarity.

“Huh? We have elections?”

“All right, what about you Rainbow Dash?”

“Nah, I’ve always thought the Princess’ll get it right.”

“Fluttershy?!” gasped Twilight.

Fluttershy cringed before Twilight and Rarity’s penetrating stares. “Well, um, I never really followed it, but uh, I suppose I could start now, uh, if you want.”

“IT’S NOT ABOUT WHAT I WANT!” exploded Twilight suddenly. Everypony jerked back from the table. “I can’t believe you’re so apathetic! Don’t you care about what Equestria’s government is doing?!”

“Well, ‘course we do, Twilight!” huffed Applejack. “But what’s there to worry ‘bout? And if there’s anything wrong, well, we got you to ask.”

“That’s not the point! Yeah, you’ve got me, but you’re not just normal ponies! Millions of normal ponies don’t have me they can just ask! Do you even know who Ponyville’s MP is?!”

“Uh, Mayor Mare?”

“Of course it’s not Mayor Mare! If you don’t know, how can thousands of other ponies know who their MPs are? How will they know who to complain to if they don’t like something the government’s doing?”

“But, it’s like your bro said, Twilight,” said Rainbow Dash. “Ponies have never been happier with Celestia!”

“That isn’t the point!” snapped Twilight. “What if Celestia gets something wrong?!”

A stunned silence met her words. Twilight realised that years of signing herself as Celestia’s most faithful student must have made them believe that she thought Celestia omnibenevolent. They clearly thought so, but Twilight knew enough of Equestria’s history to know that, well-meaning, kind and powerful as she was, Celestia was far from infallible.

“So, uh, Fluttershy!” said Spike quickly in the ringing silence. “How’s Discord doing?”

“Oh, it’s so nice of you to break that awkward silence, Spike,” said Fluttershy earnestly. “To be honest, I actually haven’t seen Discord since Princess Celestia brought him back to Canterlot.”

“But, that was before Twilight’s coronation!”

“I know. I’ve been meaning to ask about him, but uh, I suppose the Princess has a lot of things on her mind.”

“What?” demanded Twilight. Everypony looked round as if they expected another outburst. “Fluttershy, why in the wide wide world of Equestria didn’t you ask me to look into it?”

Before Fluttershy could answer, there was a knock at the door.

“Your Highness, the Chief of Intelligence begs an audience,” said the Guard through the wood.

Twilight groaned. “Now, Corporal?”

“He insists it can’t wait.”

She sighed. “Okay. Please send him in.”

A Guard in gold armour opened the door and a Unicorn stallion trotted through. His eyes were amber and his coat was a light grey. His mane was so dark it was almost black, and his cutie mark was a brass telescope.

“Your Highness,” he said unctuously. “My ladies, I do beg your pardon for the interruption!”

“Girls,” said Twilight. “This is Amber Spyglass, the Chief of Intelligence.”

“A spy?” asked Rainbow Dash, perking up.

“Oh, forgive me, Ms. Dash!” laughed Amber Spyglass. “I am sorry to say that my job is very much unlike one of your Daring Do novels!”

“Hey! How do you know about that?!”

“As you say, my dear, I am a spy. It is my responsibility to know everything that goes on in this kingdom and outside it. And yet I am now faced with an unfortunate gap in my knowledge.”

“Oh?” asked Twilight.

“Yes, Your Highness. May I ask what you seven, the Royal Pony Sisters, Princess Cadance and Prince Shining Armor were doing in the south tower half an hour ago? Hardly the nicest place for a brunch with family and friends, wouldn’t you agree?”

“I’m sorry, Amber, but it doesn’t concern you, and in any case it won’t be going anywhere.”

“You’ve got me interested, Your Highness! Don’t you worry; I’ll have it worked out before long!”

And with that, he swept from the room.

“How on earth is he allowed to speak to you in that manner?” gasped Rarity.

“He’s indispensable and he knows it,” said Twilight angrily. “He hasn’t made a single incorrect prediction or inaccurate report since he started the job, and his spy network’s never been penetrated. I’m not even sure the Princess knows who they are.”

“Since when did we have spies?” asked Rainbow Dash.

“Oh, Equestria’s always had a Chief of Intelligence,” said Twilight. “Princess Celestia doesn’t like to publicise it much though. After Nightmare Moon was defeated, she had a spy network formed to track down any Nightmare sympathisers who were left.”

“Well, enough with this boring governmenty stuff!” squeaked Pinkie Pie. “When you coming back to Ponyville, Twilight?! We can have a coming-back party! I’ll get Mr and Mrs Cake to bake you a huge coming-back cake! And when you need to go away again, we can have a Twilight’s-going-away-but-will-hopefully-be-back-soon party!”

“Actually, Pinkie, I’ll be back for Winter Wrap Up after...”

“ALL RIGHTY!” cheered Pinkie. “Spike, take a letter. To Mr and Mrs Cake, we are going to need a CAKE! Make sure that’s in capital letters, okay? Good. Also, plenty of candy, a piñata, a large supply of Gak...”

Comments

[wowu5]

What I have in mind when I first saw the title was Tom Clancy's 'Patriot Games' and I've noticed that the Royal Guards in the prologue bears many similarities (purchase of commission, ranks, tactics and command etc.) with the British Army. (Kipling’s Victorian Army, to be precise) Not to mention the officer that you choose as avatar image. (Is it from Monty Python?) Are you planning to make your story a pretty ‘English’ one? It’d be interesting if it is.

(you may like to check out this story as well, which also features British military in Equestria)

Anyway, I thought that the title ‘Captain-General’ is only used by artillery. Shouldn’t Shining Armour be the Guards’, which appears to be regiments of foot or (air) cavalry rather than artillery, Colonel-in-chief instead? (Or Colonel of the Regiment as he actually commands the guards, you can let Cadence be the CiC)

[OTCPony]

2746326

Thanks for the feedback! The Guards in the prologue are supposed to be a more Napoleonic-era army than Victorian, and later on the Crystal Empire branch of the Guard will start to more resemble the Russian Army of the Napoleonic Wars than the British (though rest assured, I will not forget the Redcoats!). Thanks for the fic rec as well, looks interesting.

As for Shining Armor's rank, I originally had him as Colonel-in-Chief, but since he's canonically known as the "Captain of the Guard", I decided to go for Captain-General instead. At this point in the story, Equestria has almost no military establishment beyond the regiment of Guards in Canterlot and a company detached to the Crystal Empire, so there's no variance in ranks between branches, because no branches outside the infantry exist.

And as for the avatar, it's General Melchett from Blackadder Goes Forth.

[Storyteller27]

Interesting premise.... I am intrigued!

Have a like!

--Storyteller27