Equestria's Struggle: Chronicles of the 20th ERAD

by ZatGeneral

Prologue Part 1: Unplanned and Unpleasant Stops

Prologue Part 1: Unplanned and Unpleasant Stops

April 24th, 11th year of the Age of the Princesses
Sergeant First Class Smartmouth
20th Equestrian Royal Armored Division, C Battalion, Heavy Armor Platoon D

“Sergeant! Sergeant wake up!” Cried Crossfire.

“Buh!?! *snort* What? Are we under attack?”

“No, well not for now at least” chuckled Crossfire. “Commander Applejack wants to talk to you.”

“And why isn’t Spehlczech talking to me about it?” The fact that Smartmouth’s gunner is performing Spehlczech’s role as radio operator bothered her a bit.

“He’s outside with Grumpy and Pushover”

“You mean we’re not moving?”

At that very moment Smartmouth realised that her tank in fact wasn’t moving. The normal rocking and swaying of the chassis was absent, the rumbling of her tank’s engine was absent and the chatter of her crew is absent. Quickly, Smartmouth switched on her intercom and began to talk to her commander.

“Commander? Why has the column stopped moving?” she asked with a bit of anguish.

“Well cock-a-doodle-do sug’r plum, ‘bout time ya woke up. Listen, some of these here Vee-Kay-Vee Heavies dog-gone broke down. Their crews are work’n mighty hard but it’s still gonna take them a bit ta get our big guns up’n ready.”

Lieutenant Applejack’s tone resonated with disappointment but it really shouldn’t have surprised her. Vladhoof Korporation Vehicles have never been the most mechanically reliable.

“The gosh-darn VKVs just gave out like a barn that’s been eat’n by parasprites. ”

Smartmouth quickly threw open the hatch to her cupola, peered out and looked towards the front of the column. Five tanks ahead were two of the disabled VKVs. One of the VKVs has completely lost all of its right road wheels and was now parked in a rain ditch on the side of the road. The other VKV shed its tracks which were still on the road and all fifty tons of the VKV plowed through a cornfield into a grain silo. An angry farmer, along with the VKV’s embarrassed crew were trying to dislodge the tank from the grain silo without having the entire structure come crashing down onto their already broken tank.

Lieutenant Applejack was standing by a company jeep near the VKV parked in the rain ditch. Her pacing around the jeep indicated she was frustrated beyond words.

“How long have the VKVs been out of commission Commander?”

“Bout two hours or so. Rec’n it’ll take the whole dang day ta get them up’n running again.”

Smartmouth turned to look behind her. To her surprise sergeant Tanky, her wingpony, was stomping furiously on her VKV’s turret. She was puzzled over what was wrong with her wingpony’s tank, but then she noticed black soot around the VKV’s oscillating turret. Tanky’s VKV had a major engine malfunction and caught fire. A engineering crew was already attempting to remedy the issue but like the other VKVs this one wasn't going anywhere any time soon.

“Anywho, Ah want ya ta keep these here ponies in line until either Ah get back, or ya’ll meet up with me in Downtown City.”

“Me?” Smartmouth asked as she quickly whipped her head back in Applejack’s direction.

“Do Ah have ta repeat what Ah just said sergeant?” Even from this moderate distance Applejack could still see the surprise in Smartmouth’s eyes.

“Well... it’s... it’s just... um... what about your tank and your crew Commander?”
Smartmouth can feel beads of sweat starting to form around her ERAD cap.

“Ah sure mah crew can handle themselves... at least Ah hope they can. Ah mean it’s just a drive down this here country road, not like there’s any other road ta get lost on.”

“But why are you even moving ahead of the battalion Commander?”

“Ah need ta evaluate tha defenses and tha support from the Petters. Not ta mention survey tha area around Downtown City fer the best places fer our tanks ta dig in.”

Applejack quickly hopped into the jeep and shifted the gear to drive.

“Ya can handle this right Smartmouth?”

Smartmouth couldn’t help but let out a small giggle. “I promise I won’t let another Marelinovka happen again Commander.”

“Just no more of them Grasschendaele stunts ya hear?”

“Loud and clear commander!”

“Listen here ya’ll! Ah’m leaving Sergeant Smartmouth in charge fer a bit! Ah’ll be riding ahead ta take a peek at what the Petters got fer their defense!”

Warrant Officer Steel Lance spoke out. “How come you’re not giving me command lass?”

“Because the last thing Ah need is is you charg’n down more cornfields Chief Lance.”

“Bah! It was just ONE time Lieutenant!” said Steel Lance as he climbed out of his Neighjing Consortium Type S3E10 Medium Tank.

Smartmouth gave her commander a salute and Applejack promptly saluted back. The engine of the jeep started to roar, all four wheels spun and the jeep took off ahead of ERAD C battalion. It wasn’t before long that Applejack and the jeep vanished beyond the horizon against the rising sun.

Smartmouth looked down at her golden-tan painted tank. Her “beautiful” M5-90 “Monarch Tiger” heavy tank. The mighty twin ninety millimeter guns of her M5-90 jutted out from the turret like two towers whose power has only begun to rise. The air was filled with the scent of engine oil and steel but there was something else in the air, something sweet.

Smartmouth turned her nose to the source of the scent and discovered that the sweet smell was that of cinnamon rolls the old farmer’s wife was bringing out for the stallions and mares of C Battalion and there seemed to be plenty for every member to get two rolls each.

“Crossfire?”

“Yea Ma’am?” replied Crossfire with her normal enthusiasm.

“Take a break.”

“But who else is going to watch the tank Ma’am?”

“I’ll take over, come on now, you’ve earned breakfast at least.”

“Yes Ma’am!”

Crossfire popped open the gunner’s hatch and clambered out of the Monarch Tiger, hopping off the turret, onto the side skirts and finally onto the ground. Before walking off to get a few of those cinnamon rolls, she gave a quick salute to Smartmouth who then promptly saluted back.

“OH FOR LUNA’S SAKE! What’s wrong with the engine now!?! I mean if the Vladhoof Korporation is going to make engines that catch fire every 5 kilometers, why the hell do I even bother with such a piece of junk!?!”

Tanky’s outbursts caught Smartmouth’s attention. The little red earth pony was a little bit more red than usual. Smartmouth was guessed a few factors to the cause of Tanky’s redshift. She deduces it was either the fact that the engine of Tanky’s VKV caught fire, the frustration of painstakingly maintaining an engine only to have it catch fire, or the family sized bag of flaming hot potato crisps Tanky was downing by the hoof full.

“It’s not that bad Ma’am.” said an engineer trying to calm Tanky down. “we only need to replace the spark plugs and fuel lines.”

Smartmouth looked over her shoulder for a minute. “Just be glad that you’re not those poor bastards over there Tanky. Those guys are chasing their runaway road wheels all over the farm.”

Tanky replied with a sigh. “Yeah... or I could be the suckers who are getting scolded by that farmer. Sheesh. He makes my dad look timid.”

Several chuckles came from Smartmouth. “Oh please, your father is one of the nicest Stallions I know.”

“That’s because you’ve never seen him angry before.”

“He’s capable of getting angry?”

“You have no idea”

“Well I can see where you get your little tantrums from.”said Smartmouth while cracking a wide smile.

“You be quiet you!”

“That’s no way to talk to your platoon leader Sergeant Tanky.”

“Well you can bite my sweet earth pony ass “Seargent First Class Smartmouth”.” Tanky muttered in a sarcastic tone.

“Zen zere izn’t anysing to bite Fräulein.” cracked Spehlczech as he set up a portable grill. The shrill pony recently moved back to Equestria after studying for twenty years with the Grammar Nazis and, in addition to his vast knowledge of the common language, has also picked up some of their harsher accents..

“WHAT DID YOU SAY?” shouted Tanky with her face practically glowing red.

Plenty of other ponies in the vicinity heard the “comment” and have all started chuckling.

“SAY THAT AGAIN TO MY FACE”

“Are you going to zay zat again? Or are you “short” on ze insults?”

By this point everypony can see that Sergeant Tanky is absolutely boiling, to the point steam is jetting out of her ears. The fact that everypony was starting to laugh made it all the more rage inducing.

“You guys should probably stop” chuckled Smartmouth. “The turret on Tanky’s VKV is still operational.”

Tanky suddenly remembered that VKVs did not rely on hydraulics from the engine to rotate the traverse gear, instead, four electric motors powered the turret and allowed it to rotate and oscillate independent from the engine should the engine suffer a breakdown or damage during combat. She was still used to the older VKV models which she was trained for when they did used the engine to rotate the turret and Tanky couldn’t help but crack a wicked smile.

“Alright enough picking on Sergeant Tanky for one day guys. We got to stop before she starts thinking about anymore... unsavory ideas. Come one now, back to work, Commander Applejack is expecting us.”

- - -

April 24th, 10th year of the Age of the Princesses
Lieutenant First Class Applejack
20th Equestrian Royal Armored Division, C battalion, Heavy Assault Platoon A

Lieutenant Applejack looked behind her to see that her column of tanks was no longer visible. She didn’t know what she was expecting as the concrete and brick skyscrapers of Downtown City came into view. She looked up into the sky to see the midday sun.

‘All right... if the fellas fixed them dang VKVs they should be at the rally point by sundown.’ Applejack thought to herself.

The closer Applejack drove to Downtown City, the more she realized that the Petters were not ready for any attack. Applejack knew Petaria was a new nation and was eager to prove itself to the rest of the world, but the fact remains that it was a new nation and needed help. Applejack let out a small sigh and turned into the city limits.

‘What the hay?...’

To Applejack’s surprise, there were hardly any defensive positions, the soldiers of Petaria were cocky and boasting about how they would turn the Trolls away before Friday. But worst of all, the denizens of the city were still here. The sight of the complete lack of readiness almost spurred Applejack into a rage.

“Excuse me, but WHAT THE HAY IS GOING ON HERE!?!” shouted Applejack to a rather short chameleon soldier.

“Whoa whoa whoa, what are you talking about?” cried the chameleon in confusion.

“What are them civilians still doing here!?! Don’t ya’ll know that the Trolls are coming?”

“Trolls? *snort* You mean those idiotic no-brain but stupid *snort* err... dumb no good... things? *snort*” stuttered the plump pig soldier next to his chameleon comrade. “Don’t you worry miss! *snort* The Trolls got nothing on us.”

“Well it seems like them Trolls ain’t the only ones who’r “dumb ‘n no good”.”

“Hey who are you to talk to us like that?”

“Yeah *snort* who are you to talk to us about that!”

The chameleon couldn’t help but bring his palm to his face. “A lotta help you are...”

“Oh, ya’ll asking ‘bout lil’ol me? Why Ah’m the commander of C battalion of the Equestrian Royal Armored Division and Ah find the situation concerning yer city mighty distasteful. Ya’ll can take me to yer commanding officer so Ah can straighten this here mess out.”

“Oh my... I am so sorry Commander”

“No you’re not *snort*”

“Be quiet you.” muttered the chameleon. “I am Private Manuel, Third Rifle Division, First Petarian Infantry. I apologize Commander, I had no idea that Equestria took over Petaria over night so that her officers could command soldiers that NEVER BELONGED to Equestria.”

“What Equestria should do is teach ya’ll some respect! Ah didn’t drive mah tanks to another country just ta be back-sassed by some private!”

“No, you’re here because you’re “Pretty Poofy Princesses” don’t think that we Petters can handle one fight with some Trolls!”

“*Oink* Duh, yeah! You don’t think we can do it!”

Applejack realized that she was not going to get pass the Petarian’s stubbornness. She let out a sigh and quietly asked, “Can ya’ll please, take me to tha commanding officer in charge of these here defenses?”

“Now that’s the tone you should have been using from the start. Ma’am.”

“*Snort* Yeah! From the start, pony!”

“We’ll take you to Captain Fanny. Commander. This way.”

“*Snort* yeah! This way!”

Applejack rolled her eyes and proceeded to follow the two soldiers. While she was walking, she took note of every possible defensive position, every possible place to set up an ambush and every place that could provide cover for her tanks. The walk was long, already the sun was moving towards the horizon, not yet setting but it must have been past lunch. Applejack could see her tankers grilling corn on the long country road, she could see the old farmer happy as ever that her tankers were spending their bits on his crops and she could see that her gallant tankers have fixed their broken VKVs.

“Ma’am?, ma’am?”

“*SNORT* You there pony?”

Applejack snapped out of her trance only to realize that she was in front of Captain Fanny’s office. Applejack looked around and from the look of the marble floors and the white plaster walls, she realized that she was standing in Downtown City’s town hall.

Manuel knocked a few times on the door. “Captain?”

“Yes?”

“The Equestrian Commander is here”

“Good good send her in.”

Manuel opened the door with the attitude of a gentlepony finding the fact that’s he’s rabid.

“Ah suppose Ah should thank ya.”

“Oh please, it wasn’t like it was a challenge or anything.”

“*Snort* it was for me... those steps... *snort*”

“Stop your whining. Come on, the lunch specials must be happening now.”

At the very prospect of food, the pig ran out to the streets dragging Manuel with him. Applejack had never in her life seen a pig run with the speed of a raging buffalo and couldn’t help but smirk a little. She quickly turned her attention to Captain Fanny who was in the midst of preparing her afternoon coffee. The scent of chocolate and fresh ground coffee bean was strong in the room, clinging onto the lace curtains and the furniture. She walked into the decedent room. The furniture, the rugs, even the tablecloths looked like they belonged in the large manors and palaces of Canterlot.

“So you are the Equestrian Commander sent to provide assistance to us?”

“Indeed Ah am Ma’am.”

Captain Fanny couldn’t help but scoff a little bit. “Well I’m afraid that your ponies won’t have a lot to do when the Trolls attack us, as you must have seen when arrived. We are more than ready to take on the Trolls, with all due respect Commander Applejack.” She turned to face the windows, her green, fluffy tail whipping around along with her long hair.

“Ready? Ya’ll haven’t evacuated yer civilians yet! Ya’ll only got five feet of barbed wire strung across the whole gosh-darn city! How in the name of Celestia are ya’ll ready!?!”

“I thought you’d might ask that question, please Commander, follow me.”

Applejack followed hesitantly, she was sure that Captain Fanny would gloat about how Petaria and the Petters could take on the Troll hordes with little more that their will and spirit. But to her pleasant surprise , Captain Fanny actually began listing viable answers.

“I know and understand your concern over the vast numbers of civilians still here in Downtown City. You see, it’s a matter of morale. A country can’t win a war if their people refuse to fight. The longer we wait to evacuate those civilians, the more they’ll think their tiny nation is a power on its own. But rest assured, we will begin to evacuate them by nightfall.”

“That’s an awfully risky move there missy, them Trolls are mighty hard ta predict and they can strike at anytime.”

“Yes, the military of Petaria understands that, or at least I do. I also must apologize if I seemed to disregard Equestria’s effort to defend her ally, but you must understand, Petaria is not a protectorate of Equestria and it never was.”

“If it’s not too much of a trouble Ma’am, Ah’d like ta see the lands around yer city along this walk.”

“Sure thing Commander, but I must ask, why? Why do you want to survey the lands around Downtown City?”

“Well Ah gotta take note of all tha possible positions for mah tanks ta take Ma’am.”

“You mean you’re not going to position your tanks in the city?” Captain Fanny asked with a curious tone.

“Eventually, yeah. Ah plan for all mah tanks to draw them Trolls into the city on mah own accord. But first, we’re gonna make a stand outside ta really get them angry.”

“Why in the world would you want to make Trolls angry?”

“Because Trolls don’t think when they’re angry.”

The walk was a fairly long one. Captain Fanny took a route that led around Downtown City. Applejack was tediously taking notes about every hill, ledge and rock that her tanks could take cover behind. After about three hours or so of walking, sightseeing and note taking, Applejack and Captain Fanny arrived in a large open green field. There was a plaza, fully paved with flagstones and strewn with lovely benches and lamps. There was a stunning view of the open lands outside Downtown City and the roads that lead into the city itself. For there Applejack can see the sun was starting to set.

The field looked like it was the city park and inside it stood rows upon rows of... tanks? These “tanks” were no higher than Applejack if she stood on her hind legs. They only had four wheels on each side of the tank, one large drive wheel rear, one idler wheel in the front and a pair of road wheels. Captain Fanny began to walk around one of these so called “tanks”.

“This is the Petter Panzer Mark-One.” Captain Fanny’s voice was full of pride, her voice boomed of national honor and prestige. “The model next to me is armed with a K9-thirty five millimeter cannon. She sports a forty horsepower petrol engine and is protected by more than fifteen millimeters of solid steel.” Captain Fanny gave a quick smile and walked over to another PPM-1. “This Petter Panzer, is armed with a twenty millimeter grenade launcher AND a Chewing, eight millimeter machine gun for a anti-infantry role.”

Applejack stood there, like a fruit, wondering how a any of the Petters could think that they’re ready to face off against a Troll horde with THESE armored tractors.

Captain Fanny turned to face Applejack. “So, Commander. What do you think?”

Applejack stood there, like a fruit, wondering how badly the Trolls would decimate these pathetic excuses for tanks.

“Speechless? I understand Commander. The PPM-1 are truly a sight to behold.”

“You really wanna know what Ah think? Ah think ya’ll are so caught up in yer own lil’ fantasy that ya’ll are SO powerful, that ya’ll forgot that Equestria has been protect’n yer flanks for SO long! Ah don’t know what ya’ll are think’n but. IT’S. JUST. STUPID!”

Captain Fanny seemed unimpressed by Applejack’s sudden outburst. “Well, if you think Equestria is so “high and mighty” where are the armies that your “pretty pink princess’” were going to send? And I also don’t believe that YOU, a lowly FIELD COMMANDER have ANY right to judge my tanks. Infact, I don’t seem to recall ANY of your own tanks here? Where are they Commander? Tell me that.”

Almost as if Fanny tempted fate, the ground beneath their feet started to rumble. It wasn’t that strong of a rumble, but it was more than noticeable to Fanny and the denizens of Downtown City.

"Mah tanks ya say? They're right on time."

Captain Fanny watched as Applejack’s massive tanks roll into the plaza from the city. To her surprise, these hulking masses of steel only took up one lane of Downtown City’s roads. She stood there in awe as tanks like the M5, the VKV, the Type S2E14 and the HT6 trundled up and over the sidewalks and into the plaza. She was even more impressed that the drivers of these monstrous heavy tanks skillfully maneuvered their beasts of war around the park benches and lamps, never knocking down a single one. Applejack’s tanks began forming rows, using the benches and lamps as a automobile driver would use the white lines in a parking lot.

Smartmouth’s M5 parked itself right behind where Applejack stood. She then popped open her commander’s hatch and gave a salute to her commander.

“Sorry for the delay Commander!” shouted Smartmouth. “The boys of Hag Platoon were forced into fixing the grain silo.”

“Ah shucks, it ain’t like them boys ta do such a nice favor like that.”

Captain Fanny stood there wide eyed and slack jawed. “T-t-t-t-t-t-t-h-ose... are... your tanks!?!?” She was in a state of shock and disbelief.

“Oh. So ya like mah tanks?” said Applejack as she gave Smartmouth’s M5 a pat. “Sergeant Smartmouth?”

“Yes Ma’am?”

“Would ya be so kind as to recite a few of yer tanks stats for Captain Fanny here?”

“Of course ma’am!” Smartmouth took a breath and looked straight at Captain Fanny. “This is the Mark-Five “Monarch Tiger” manufactured by the Porshoe Automobil Holding. Its main armament are these twin, high velocity ninety-millimeter guns. They are capable of penetrating over two hundred and eighty millimeters of armor at a distance of one and a half kilometers, which happens to be the extent of its range as well. The M5 is protected with one hundred and fifty millimeters of armor. As you can see Ma’am, the front of the M5 is built in a pike nose fashion, which means the armor value of the M5’s front is more than two hundred millimeters of armor should an enemy tank’s shell strike horizontal to the ground.”

“I hope these Petters have some good food around here.” said Tanky as she lifted herself out of her VKV.

“Sergeant Tanky? Care ta recite your tank’s statistics for Captain Fanny here?”

“Do I have to Ma’am? I’m starving!”

“Your belly can wait sugar plum.”

With a heavy sigh, Tanky began reciting her VKV’s statistics. “The Vladhoof Korporation Vehicle is protected by one two hundred millimeters of armor in the front, keep in mind that is is sloped so the armor value is more than I’m giving. The VKV sports a two hundred and twenty five millimeter howitzer that can lob a high explosives shell more than two kilometers. The reason the howitzer can shoot with such force is because the neither the gun or the turret have recoil control mechanisms, therefore more of the shell’s force goes out of the gun. This is also why the VKVs are known to have problems concerning their suspension.” Tanky took a deep breath.

“Can I please be dismissed Ma’am?”

“You may enjoy the rest of yer even’n Sergeant Tanky.”

And with Applejack’s say so, the rest of C Battalion’s members trotted off for the night.

“So, Captain Fanny. What do ya think?”

_ _ _

Author's Note:

I really hope there aren't any Petters who take offense to this. I personally find My Littlest Petshop enjoyable but I'm basing the semi-hostilities from what I've seen on MLP and MLPS forums and the whole "Brony vs Petter" thing going around the internet... which is stupid.

You may also notice a few things similar between this story and TS874's story. We're doing a semi-collaboration where we exchange some ideas and characters around so expect to see my characters and TS874's characters in both stories.

Comments

[StormAlchemist15]

...damn