Okay, I am currently one the 10th chapter of my current fic. I have run into an old enemy of mine. Namely, I can't seem to make the dialogue flow the way I want. Now I have a decent vocabulary but it is not expansive and I am trying to write for Rarity of all ponies. It is very difficult to write for someone highclass when you do not have that level of speech yourself. As such I am hopping for some help. The chapter can be found here and the story can be found here.

Normally I have a beta that I can bounce ideas off of but she is having computer issues. I hope you don't mind giving me some assistance. I would also like to rework the first chapter again to be more inline with what I have but I am not certain how.

1855867 Did what I could :)

Thank you, and thanks for pointing out the copy paste error. That would have been embarrassing if I had missed that glaring of a mistake and posted the chapter.

Okay I have chapter 10 up now and I am satisfied with it. It is certainly one of the larger chapters I have done recently. But again I am interested in getting a better fix for chapter 1.