TDrawn In

• Equestria Girls
• Sad
• Slice of Life

Gilda and Fluttershy share a heart-to-heart talk one summer night on the lake.

• Alt. Universe
• Gilda
• Fluttershy (EqG)

SunTwi06 · 3.1k words  ·  29  4 · 536 views

Review: Drawn in

Tags:  [Sad] 70%, [Slice of life] 100%

Summary:  Gilda and Fluttershy make a friendly relationship.  It’s a bonding experience between friends. The lake seems to be rather beautiful as a setting. Also a decent friend relationship.

Detail analysis: I saw a lot of friendship relationships well because I’m a pegasister.  Knowing that Gilda and Fluttershy I believe that could be cannon if hasbro made a season 10. (where did it all go T_T) 

Critic:  Even though the title chapter may say The Cold Night  I just don’t think it was that cold.  Due to expectations they both could have cuddled together to make a good memory right there by the lake and the good scenery.  They should have shivered and got close to one another.  That’s the only thing that is missing.

Scores 

The idea is strongly a 8/10.  Why is it an 8/10 you say?  Well, because it’s a good idea to have characters who weren’t friendly in the cannon and see what people can write about them if it was truly possible.

The flow of it is clearly an 8/10.  I think the flow could be a tiny bit better like at least 10%.

Grammar well it’s clearly 7/10.  There have been only a few mistakes in grammar.

The dialogue choices are clearly an 8/10. I do like the dialogue in this.

 The interest of this fiction is clearly no other than a 10/10.  The fiction is very interesting to read.

41/50

8.5/10

7469503 Thank you for the review. I was a little worried when you messaged me via PM. Also, off topic but you misspelled the title. Its Drawn In, not Draw In. I make these kinds of mistakes all the time so its not a big deal

7469704
don't worry I'll have my best person to fix that. I had it to just the chapter as the title was The Cold Night.. yes even I do make mistakes sometimes when I write.

7469704
and the title is now fixed.