Greetings Everypony! I've been at work on a title I call "Ethereal", a surreal story that focuses upon a Griffin only known as "The One". The story follows a narrative poem format and is approximately 1.100 words. It would be nice for someone to proofread the story and maybe edit it a little bit. I know the story needs a little work on it but it would be nice for someone to take a look at it.

Link to the story can be found here

5370172
Good story: the only error I saw was the Its and it's.
Examples/References:

It's not easy- Right. Its not easy- Wrong.

Stretching it's wings- Wrong. Stretching its wings- Right.

Looks good otherwise.

5370191 thanks for providing clear feedback it is greatly appreciated

5370194
No problem. I'm glad I could help!

I'll help ya out. Be lucky you've only got to proofread 1,100 words... this monster of a story I've been working on is at 113,000 right now :<

Alright... just finished reading this, and I must say this was wonderful. I don't think I've read something like this, ever. You did a perfect job of keeping things very obscure yet clear; it was easy to tell exactly what was going on.

I'll have to say the same thing as Amethyst, work on your apostrophes. EX: With eye's of hope and realized that no matter what

If you use chrome as your browser, I HIGHLY recommend you download the Grammarly plugin: https://www.grammarly.com/ (not sponsored by Grammarly). I use it for my writing and it will catch probably 80 percent of your errors.

5370172

I liked the details and description you put in there. But perhaps you could've given the characters a little more thought, like how they felt or how their surroundings affected them.

5370387

But that's the beauty of the poem. You're left to interpret that. I give you the tools and you make something out of them

5370547
Well you could've at least say how they feel. I think that would give them more depth.

5370550

This poem was built to be highly interpretive.

5370226

Just installed it and it really helped me out, a lot, thank you so much. I've not been the best with grammar

5370387
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Thank you all so much for your feedback. I'll make sure to include you all as proofreaders and editors

5370572
Ooh! Thanks!

5370569 No one is. It's like... the hardest thing about writing.

5370172
*Clicks link*

Poetry!
#2deep4me