Let's see how this goes.

Butterflies and Flowers by Thespia-Rose
1,579 words
Tags: SoL

Grammar: 9/10
Besides some inconsistency with the spelling of Posey's name, I didn't notice anything that distracted from the story. The sentences towards the beginning did drag on for quite a bit, but nothing that was too unreasonable.
Characterization: 7/10
Now, I know it's hard to do characterization in the space of 1500 words or so. But this story just skims the surface of Feather Dance's and Posey's characters. Most of what we learn about them is dumped into a paragraph right near the beginning, and that covers little more than their physical appearance. The rest of the story is just summarizes them falling in love, instead of delving into their characters. Fluttershy stays relatively consistent with her character, but she mainly acts as a catalyst to introducing her parents. It's not too bad, but definitely leaves the reader longing for a lot more.
Use of Canon: 10/10
No complaints here. Fluttershy doesn't do anything I wouldn't expect her to, and I like the subtle comparisons between Posey's flight school and Fluttershy's.
Use of OCs: 6/10
See my above complaints about Posey and Feather Dance's characters.
Consistency: 9.5/10
Despite the lack of characterization, nothing happens that would seem out of place for a relative of Fluttershy. The romantic aspect seems a little forced and rushed, but it's forgivable in context.
Coherence: 8./10
The overall pace of the story feels rushed. It zips from one part of the story to the next, leaving the reader wanting more. The ending is an especially egregious example, turning what could have easily been a very heartwarming addition to the story into an almost missable comment. It's not nearly as bad as some other works I've read, but it's still enough to detract from the story.
Slice of Life-iness: 7.5/10
When dealing with Slice of Life, the important thing is to capture every aspect of the moment. This story just barely manages to do that. Between the pacing and the characterization, a lot of the context is lost. With some revisions, this could have easily been one of the most heartwarming stories on the site. But as is, it's merely a run-of-the-mill backstory to a pair of OCs. Not bad, but not standout, either.

Final Score: 57/70 81% ACCEPTED

Notes: I felt rather indifferent after reading this. It's good enough to not be unreadable, but falls flat in most aspects. It's definitely a take it or leave it story.

4880247 It's good to see at least someone besides me alive and trucking, I was worried that I'd the lonely one