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It took me two weeks to finally get around to writing this, sorry about that, Unidentified. Life's been rekting me so hard.

Anyway, woo, more sinning from an author who just got his sh*t rekt with like 24 sin reviews on ONE story! All written from the same person!

Also, instead of reading the story, and THEN sinning it. I'm gonna go in blind, and sin it AS I read it. Meaning there may be more sins than I usually would put, due to it being pure first reactions.

This should be fun, right?

Everything Wrong With:

Luna Gets a Quad Feed
By: Unidentified


Luna gets a quad feed on CoD (More specifically AW). That's pretty much it.

^ This is the description of the story. This is all I have to base my expectations for this story. We good? Alright. 1.

This chapter title. 2.
Also, silly fimfiction! Is it 1,453 words? Or 1,452? 3.

"You cannot comprehend my amazing sniping skills! I WILL ANNIHILATE YOU!" Luna shouted.

"Oh shut it Luna. You haven't even won a single quickscope match against me," said Celestia.

Replace sniping and quickscopes with combos and reads, and you have a perfect representation of every Smash 4 match of me vs my cousin. 4.

"You only won those matches because I was lagging!" Luna retorted.

My cousin in a nutshell. 5.

"Oh sure, blame the lag. Just accept the fact that you suck at sniping," said Celestia.

Me in a nutshell. 6.

Luna and Celestia were sniping each other in a 1v1 FFA quickscoping match. They were playing on MW3 on the map Erosion. They were on the same console so it was a split-screen match. Celestia was in the lead with 11 kills. Luna was trailing behind with only 4. One of them had to reach 15 kills in order to win the match. The only difference was that they had to trickshot for the final kill.

You know what's funny? I don't play CoD or any shooting game at all, so I barely understood any of this. 7.
But, I know MLG memes, so I was able to understand "sniping", "quickscoping", and "trickshot". 8.
I've also played enough multiplayer games to know what split-screen matches are, so stfu if you're getting ready to call me out for not knowing what they are. (No, this is not a sin, this is just something I wanted to point out.)

Luna was determined to beat Celestia this time. She had lost 7 games in a row but that wasn't going to stop her from reaching her goal. This will be her comeback! Her time to shine!


"STOP SPAWN KILLING ME!" Luna shouted.

—that. 9.

Celestia was now at 14, Luna was still stuck on 4. Luna was desperate to win the match, even if it meant cheating. In the world of quickscoping, it was a sin to kill a player with a weapon that wasn't a sniper, a pistol, or a throwing knife/tomahawk.

So basically you're trying to be the most MLG player in the world? 10.

If a quickscoper wanted to use streaks, they would either need to use the specialist streaks or non-lethal streaks like UAV, CUAV, EMP, etc.

I understood nothing out of this. 11.

The next few sentences are Celestia and Luna playing the actual game, with a few moments here and there where the two of them argue for cheating when it's supposedly "playing fair", I couldn't find sins for those so I decided to skim over the sentence...

Next thing Luna knew, she had lost to Celestia by a MP7. "Get on my level you loser!"

...But then this happened. 12.

Celestia had then got up and left the room. Luna sat there, upset and furious that she had lost yet again.

Basically me and my cousin when... wait, no, this actually hasn't happened to us... Nevermind. 13.

"I hate this stupid game..." Luna removed the game disc from the console and placed it back into it's rightful place. She had then took out a different game and placed it into the console: Advanced Warfare.

"If I can't beat Celestia, I'll just go online on practically the same game and rekt other skrubs!" Brilliant logic, Luna! (+5) 18.

Luna didn't really play much of it due to the new Exo-Movement system and the Skill Based Matchmaking but this time it was an exception. The game had a new mode in it called One Shot which was basically sniper heaven for quickscopers and trickshotters. She actually had plans to play One Shot with a few friends of hers. Luna invited her friends as soon as she connected to the multiplayer servers. 3 new players had soon joined the party.

So, she can't snipe, trickshot, or quickscope Celestia, so she's going to challenge other ponies she knows in a match that's practically all about the same thing? I fail to see how this will work... 19.


I can't help but facepalm at all these usernames. I get they're supposed to make fun of all the MLG usernames, but these are still just as cancerous... 20.

"Shining, Cadance and Twilight. Nice of you to join me today," Luna said over the mic.

It took me a while to figure out why Shining, Cadance, and Twilight have usernames like the ones I listed up there when compared to "LunaSnipesWell", and then I looked closer. TwiZ360, TrikkyCaddy, and SKSnipezzz. At least Luna's username has her freaking name in the username, but everyone else kinda just went for nicknames or acronyms! (+10) 30.

"Luna, are you sure you want to play this mode?" Shining Armor asked. "You're not necessarily the best at sn-"

"Please do not question my skills, Shining," said Luna.

"Okay, fine then."

inb4 Luna get rekt. 31.

The four of them spent most of their time joining and leaving lobbies mainly because the maps were just awful. They had finally stopped when they had found their desired map, Terrace, appear on the loading screen. And lucky for them, the game had just started! They chose their class setups and went into battle.

Wait, if it's a friends only match, shouldn't you be able to pick the map you want? Even if it wasn't a friends only match, couldn't you at least vote for the map you wanted? 32.

"Us four and two randoms? This should be fun," said Shining.

"Alright, don't let them kill you too much. We can't afford to suffer de-" Luna's sentence was cut off as a sniper shot her from behind. "Damn it!"

"Welp, looks like the other team took the lead," said Cadance.

Didn't I call Luna getting rekt earlier? -Looks up- Oh, it appears that I did. 33.

"I NEED SOME ASSISTANCE OVER HERE!" Twilight shouted. There were red dots appearing all around Twilight on the minimap.

"I'll save ya sis!" said Shining. He ran towards Twilight and killed off a couple of the attackers. Unfortunately, Twilight was shot before Shining could kill the final attacker.

"Aaaand I died," said Twilight. "You tried."

"At least I avenged you."

This sounds vaguely similar to me and my cousin trying to fight online in Smash 4 in "For Glory" 2v2 mode... 34.

The next few sentences were just the game going on, and Luna pretty much costing the match. I don't see anything sin-worthy...

But then, I found the moment we all were waiting for!


Everypony on her team stayed back and watched as Luna rushed onto the enemy side once again. Except this time, it was completely different. It was like the game had slowed down for her! Luna was dodging all of their attacks and she was shooting each enemy with 100% accuracy. She was slowly getting kill after kill, leading her team to victory. Then, Shining looked at the feed and saw the unthinkable, the impossible, the unimaginable happen! He didn't want to believe it at first but after looking at it again and again, he finally screamed at the top of his lungs:


Roll the credits! 35.
Oh, it's not done yet? Okay. 36.
The fact that Shining was so surprised to see Luna getting a quad feed doesn't make this any funnier than it's supposed to be. I dunno, I guess it's just me. 37.

It was like the whole world had awoken. Luna hit a quad. A QUAD. A quad feed is an amazing acomplishment for the average sniper. But, when a noob sniper like Luna gets a quad feed, it's mind blowing. Everypony on Luna's team freaked out and screamed at the top of their lungs.

I can already imagine them shouting dumb things like a raging Twitch chat. 38.

"KEEP GOING LUNA! KEEP GOING!!" Cadance screamed into the mic.

Luna went on a five, six, seven, eight, NINE killstreak before the game ended. The final killcam showed Luna noscoping and getting a 4 piece collateral. Of course, this led to more screaming.

GG. 39

As the scoreboard appeared on the screen, Shining, Cadance and Twilight realized that Luna still had a negative K/D despite going on an insane streak. They also noticed that the two randoms on their team had left earlier. After they were back in the pre-game lobby, they left to recap on what had just happened.

"Luna, that was amazing what you did back there!" said Shining.

"Yeah! You hit your first quad AND got a noscope 4 piece collat!" said Cadance.

"You just went from noob to pro in one game!" said Twilight.

"It's what I do," said Luna.

"You should tell Celestia about your new accomplishment!" Shining suggested.

"That's what I'm about to do."

inb4 Celestia's just like "lol now watch me get a quad feed three times in the same match" 40.

Celestia sat there on her throne, bored out of her mind. She was hoping for something interesting to happen like a new problem or a new disaster of some sort. Then, out of nowhere, a letter had hit Celestia straight in the face.

"Ack! What is the meaning of this?!" Celestia swiped the letter off her face and held it out in front of her. It was a letter from Luna.

I would've shown Luna's letter, but it wasn't MLG enough, so, just for this sin review, I will fill it in with my own letter!

Dear Celestia,



See? MUCH better! (+20) 60.

"...Not amused." Celestia burned the letter and continued to sit on her throne in boredom.

F*ck you too, Celestia! 61.

Story Sin Talley: 61
Sentence: Get rekt in Luna's Quad Feed.

"You only won those matches because I was lagging!" Luna retorted.

My cousin in a nutshell. 5.

Because split screen totally has lag


Wait what, she did what now. since when can, you know what imma just call hax.


Because split screen totally has lag

Lemme rephrase my sentence.

My cousin in a nutshell when playing online against anyone.

5141915 I was commenting on Luna, not the idi— your cousin lol

5141692 Whoever made this is a f*ggot majestic as f*ck. This amazing story deserves a sequel. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


This sounds vaguely similar to me and my cousin trying to fight online in Smash 4 in "For Glory" 2v2 mode

We do not speak of that cancerous and skrub-filled mode here. At all. Ever.

read match

lag in offline match

i come back after half a year and I'm greeted with this. 10 outta 10

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