Joker's Asylum 61 members · 29 stories
Comments ( 60 )
  • Viewing 1 - 50 of 60
Jioplip
Group Contributor

Well it took me all night, but I've prepared something I think you'll like.

Now, since this is my first experiment, I've decided to take it slow, nothing too complicated.

So, here is the situation:
Each of you is suspended on a small caged platform being suspended from the ceiling, beneath you is a horridly monstrous amalgamation of whirring metal blades that will reduce you to a fine paste in about three seconds.

So here are the rules:
I will provide a simple riddle of my own devising, it's up to you to solve it, and whoever does, wins!

The winner will be allowed to go free, the rest will be dropped into the pit one by one.

But.

If anyone tries to escape, they will be dropped into the pit.

Also, if the riddle isn't solved by midnight, then I'll 'randomly' choose one of you to live.

By which I mean I won't drop you, you'll have to find your own way out.

Now that should cover everything important, on to the riddle itself:

"If you know it, stay silent, if you don't, SPEAK UP!"

"What is 'it'?"

Have fun!

1220431
Ok white, you solve the riddle when he says it.
Because you're too dumb?:trollestia:
*sigh* Yes, because "I'm really dumb"

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1220564 Our first contender!

Well now!

"If you know it, stay silent, if you don't, SPEAK UP!"

"What is 'it'?"

1220587
I HAVE NO IDEA!:raritydespair:
WHAT?!?! You're SUPPOSED TO BE SMART!:flutterrage:

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1220735 Don't worry, you have until midnight to figure it out.

...Unless somebody else does first.

1220431 *Catches on fire and teleports out out cage*

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1220973 It's funny, do you remember how Sombra enchanted the place where the Crystal Heart was kept, so that anyone who teleported out would be dragged back?

That.

Bill Clinton
Group Admin

1220431 Can you pass the popcorn?

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1221129 But of course, here you go!:twilightsmile:

1220431 The answer is the answer. :rainbowdetermined2:

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1221193 I didn't ask for the answer.

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1221261 I asked what 'it' is, if you can tell me what 'it' is in the riddle, you go free.

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1221320 Well if it wasn't then you'd be liable to survive this, now wouldn't you?

Just remember, you have until midnight to come up with a solution.

1220973>>1220735

Tick, tock, tick tick, tock.

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1221360 A good answer, but not the solution to this particular riddle.

Bill Clinton
Group Admin

1221376 He doesn't seem to be getting anywhere. I would pull the switch right now.....

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1221571 Well it doesn't seem very sporting...

1221360 I'll give you one more chance, just throw out an answer or six, there's no penalty! Except that you'll die.

1221571 I'm a she.:ajbemused:
1221612 Is it the riddle? I give up.:derpyderp1:

1221811 My first insane stamp. I will treasure it always. :heart:

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1221802 Well, it's been real fun, but you get to hell, send Fluffy my regards!

*click*

1220996 *appears on your back, still on fire* Surprise hugz!

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1222186 No, that's Pennywise.

1222642 Ordinarily I'd be angry, but you're so warm and cuddly!

*hugz!*

Oh, that warmth was fire...

1222664 *Still on fire, randomly licks your ear* :rainbowwild: Murph! *teleports away and doesn't come back for some reason*

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1222674 I have the weirdest boner right now...:moustache:

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1222856 This is It!

But even this is not 'it'.

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1222856>>1222697>>1220735>>1221811

Well everyone, it's been real fun, but midnight is almost upon us!

...Which of course means that this is your last chance to solve the riddle, soooo....

Good luck!

1223677 I dont know. The 5th amendment?

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1223687 Why would I want you not to talk if you knew the fifth amendment?

1223695 I don;t know. Im just high right now.

*randomly starts floating away* Meeeeeeeh!

1223677
Is it bad that pretty much every joint in my body starts to "Crack" when I stretch? Even my hips.
I've been sitting in this cage too long, I have to do something when I'm bored.

Anyway, here's some music that I found in my spare time.
They should play over the intercom... constantly.:pinkiecrazy:

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1223799 I'll solve that.
1223701>>1222856>>1221833

Oh well, you all tried!

*Drops the cages into the waiting maw of spinning blades*

Paste.

1223823 *bursts into flames and melts the blades before being killed, shrugs and trots off, still on fire* la la la la la la la :pinkiesmile:

1223823 Is paste the answer? I don't get it.:flutterrage:

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1223833>>1223799>>1222856>>1221811>>1223839

THE ANSWER!

WAS!

'Ignorance'.

1223823 *Blades break off on my skin* I'm hard to hit bro, my style is too devastating.

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1223864

Just a moment, I have an important question:

WHY DOES NOBODY I KILL STAY DEAD?

I swear these methods are supposed to be lethal, and yet it gets me nowhere!

1223900 You're just as insane as the rest of us! You couldn't kill anyone if you tried! You'd think that you'd killed us, but really, you just imagined it! We're all maniacs bumbling around an insane asylum growling at everything.

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1223883 No, you crashed down upon the blades like the others.

No need to worry though, considering my track record you'll probably survive this.

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1223909 That would explain Swiggity at least...

1223913
I got immortality from listening to THIS!

You see, after being strapped to a table, hooked up with IV and food supplemental machines, they proceeded to make me listen to a year long version of this.
When I got free, I got a pistol and blew my Friggin brains out!


Then I woke up in a morgue, only to find out that I'm immortal.

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1223926 At least with you there's an explanation.

Kind of.

1223935
It's the irony, the cosmic joke!
Listening to that makes you insane enough that you want to die! But then you can't.
Ha ha universe.:ajbemused: That was a good one.

Jioplip
Group Contributor

1223951 Well, on the other hand, now that you're insane anyway, and immortal...

Wait...

You're like deadpool! Only orange! And therefore not red! Also your name is not Deadpool!

But you are similar to Deadpool in other ways!

  • Viewing 1 - 50 of 60