This likely isn’t going anywhere anytime soon, so here you go · 11:13pm May 17th, 2020
I was going to write human x apul, but the opening isn’t quite what I want. Despite this, I still liked some of the words and wanted to share.
You ever see an ass that changes your life?
So there I was, eating cheese fries with my buddy Pinker Pan, when out of nowhere comes a mare I can only describe as an orange package of freckles and yeehaw. She had the lean figure of an athlete, but her flank still held on to that extra jiggle characteristic of earth ponies, which was only accentuated by her naturally wide hips. Everything about her radiated confidence, but not in the “I think I’m better than you” kinda way; it was more like the “I don’t care about looking pretty, I’ll wear two ponytails and a cowboy hat because fuck you” kinda way. If that was all, I still would’ve been smitten, but there was more. There was so much more.
As she walked past, I was confronted by the face of God. God’s face was beautiful and looked just like a pony’s ass. I couldn’t tear my eyes away. Every step she took pulled me further and further into the hypnotic sway of her hips. It was only when she was out of view that I finally realized I had been staring.
I regained my senses just in time, because Pinkus was reaching over to shove a fry up my nose. I bit it before she could pull back.
“Aw,” she frowned. “Almost. What were you staring at?”
Heaven. “Nothing.”
It’s the veeery roughest of drafts, so it doesn’t flow as well as I’d like. I might eventually do more with it, but that’ll take a lot of words. I’m bad at a lot of words.
Heh, nice
Not enough apple-loving humans out there. Here's hoping your muse cooperates.
That got me chuckling. Not many stories are as memorable as this, and this is just a rough draft.