Funny · 10:50am Nov 18th, 2018
It's funny how someone can make you feel the greatest happiness and also the greatest sadness.
It's funny how every single day I can cry for the same reason and yet the pain never lessens.
It's funny to hear people say I'll get over it. How does one get over there heart being ripped out?
I never thought I would truly know love. Lucky me I guess. I found it. Now it's gone. Or at least it's supposed to be.
I still love him with every fiber of my being. I always will.
I found my other half and now I will forever be just a piece of a person.
I can never love anyone else. I can no longer care for anyone else. People say different. People say give it time.
Time doesn't matter. You don't know me. I love him. Present tense. Even though I will no longer hear his voice or see his face.
My life is empty. I am hollow.
He wanted this though. He wanted it to be over. He wants to be happy without me. I hope he is.
I finally get it. I finally know what love means. Because I will gladly suffer until my last breath if it means he will be happy.
I care more for his happiness than mine. I pray he will be happy. He deserves it.
He is an amazing man. I am sure some of you are aware. He will have no trouble being happy.
I am left in a world that no longer holds joy for me. This life without him is my prison now. This life alone.
I had one singular dream left in me: to be a wife and mother. Now that it is gone I have truly lost my worth in this world.
The three years of memories I have will have to last me a lifetime. They are all I have left of him.
My suffering is only beginning. It will only get worse with time.
Somewhere Fate is laughing. So be it. Do not punish him for this. Let me take all the pain.
I wasted his time. I don't regret a single day though. I never could. Every day was the greatest gift I could have asked for.
Now I am truly alone in this life. My fate is sealed. I shall spend the rest of my days in solitude. I'm ready.
I can't quite say I know exactly how you feel, but I do have an idea. While I did not get to have a relationship with someone I loved, I did have to see them be with someone else and it was all my fault that it wound up that way. I felt great frustration and shame with myself for it, still do. I still care about them and hope that no matter what happens they're happy with their life. I know how it feels, to think you won't find another, and I pray to God that unless we can be together somehow that I can find another. Maybe you'll find another you can form a connection with, by the sound of it it will not be like you felt with this person, but maybe should the fates allow, you may be a wife and mother yet.
4969897
There is no one else for me. I promised him my heart and he has it. I can love nothing and nobody without it. It was not the only thing I promised him. Hard to be a mother as a virgin. I meant those promises and I still do. Till the day I die.
4970105
Well first, maybe there will be a chance you two can be together yet.
If not perhaps he will give you back your heart. Want you to be happy in your life and not shackled to regret and pain. Tell you to live your life and make the most of it.
4970109
He already did say those things. It doesn't change anything. He is also never coming back. He's stubborn and an optimist. He'll power through it and find something to be happy. He'll make some other girl incredibly happy. He'll have some kids who will love him like crazy. The only thing in his life that he wants that is different without me, is me. I have no life outside of the future we wanted. He was my only chance to escape and to be happy.
4970114
I know that feeling is strong now, and likely will for a good long time in the future, but if he still loves you, then do this for him as well as yourself: make a future for yourself where you're happy with another soul, be a good wife and loving mother, make a beautiful future as he would want you to be happy.
4970127
I'm trapped. I was lucky to find him. I don't go out. I maybe leave my house once a month. Hard to find someone out there like that. I have had too many online relationships to count. None of them lasted longer than a month. I repel people. He was perfect for me. He is my soulmate. There is nobody else out there for me. I've looked. I will die alone. The only thing different is now I know that I did have a soulmate. My life was already awful. This just adds to it.
4970136
First things first. How do you only leave your house once a month? I mean, not going into the fact I would go insane being stir-crazy. How can you survive? Are you still living with someone?
I usually only talk to people on FIM here, but I still have some kind of outside life. I could chat with some people if I really wanted to. There I believe lies a problem, you should work to get out more and meet more people
4970142
I live with my parents, my sister and her fiance. At 25 years old I am on disability and the main reason I leave the house is to go to my psychiatrist or my grandmother's house with my family. The last time I left the house to see anybody other than that was 3 months ago. I have no friends in "real life".
4970145
Do you just not feel comfortable going outside?
4970186
It's not easy for me. I don't drive because the very thought of driving scares me. So I must rely on a family who is always busy if I want to go somewhere. Often times during the day I am the only one home and at night people are too tired to want to go anywhere. My computer is the only escape I have from this place.
4970192
Driving can be a bit intimidating, but it's a fear you should try and conquer. If you can meet someone who is willing to drive you that would remedy the issue
4970201
I honestly am never going to get over it. I have been in multiple car accidents as a passenger. Being in a car terrifies me.
4970204
I've nearly drowned five times in my life, but I don't really fear the water, though I understand it's different for everyone. And you're not scared if someone else drives, so you could find a friend to drive you if you make one
4970210
I am though. Riding in a care scares me but I bear it. it is why I shall never drive because it's scary enough for me to just ride in a car.
4970218
I see. Well at any rate if you can be brave enough to bear riding around, you should try and make a friend who is willing to drive you around.
4970232
It's not really gonna happen but thank you for caring.
4970234
It won’t unless you make it. And caring is the least I can do