Sad · 8:37pm Nov 27th, 2018
Are you all tired of my depressing blogs yet?
It's sad that people who "care about me" really don't.
Every day I hurt and they tell me to "get out there" and to "get over it".
They want me to be happy even after I have explained how that can never be.
Their intent is not the sad thing though. It's the fact that they don't actually care.
I stopped openly crying every day and now I hide in my room to sob my eyes out.
I started pretending to be happy in an obvious fake way. They were happy. They were glad I was feeling better.
They can't tell I am still beyond sad. That in itself is sad.
I didn't want this fake happy life that is being forced on me. If anything it hurts more.
I want to make this clear to all of you. I will NEVER be happy again. The only thing that could do that is never going to happen. I have accepted this though. I don't need to be fixed even though I am broken. Fixed would mean that I stop caring for the man I love and I would rather die. Nothing and nobody in this world can make me feel any less for him than I do. This is my life now.
Would you like to talk about this?
4978912
More than anything. I have no one in my life left to talk to. I lost my best friend. He was the only one I had that I could tell anything to. That I could talk to and not feel judged in any way. I wish I could at least have that back. He doesn't want to talk to me at all since we broke up though.
4979090
well I won't judge you, and I'm always willing to talk to someone to help lift them up.