Marwile watches SAO Part 8: "Eff this effing Anime" · 10:31pm May 11th, 2018
Warning: Blog contains swearing.
First things first, I missed last weeks episode, because I had to work. I looked at a plot summary in case something important happened. It was about fishing... The second-to-last episode of the whole arc is about fishing. Also some build up for this episode.
The episode starts with everyone hitting the Lv 75 boss until it dies even before the OP. RIP build up for this anticlimax. After the battle Kirito realizes Heathcliffe is actually the big bad ,final boss and game dev Akihiko Kayaba. How? He only now noticed that during their duel (which was months ago) he moved a bit too fast at one moment. He paralyzes everyone except Kirito and wants to duel him a final time.
Everyone gets sappy for a moment. Not like Kirito will die or something. At this point I'm convinced he's physically unable to die. At least we see how gay Klein really is for Kirito.
They fight, Kirito loses (did this OP protagonist ever accomplish something), but in the last moment Asuna jumps before him (nobody knows how she's able to move) and dies for him (why does everyone in this MMO have One Hit Kill moves?).
Kirito is sad, Kayaba stabs him and he dies. And after his death he stabs Kayaba and kills him too (OHKO). If you didn't understand that, don't worry, nobody else does either. But because the final boss is dead, everyone can finally leave the game. Let's take a moment to appreciate how Kawahara became bored enough by his own story to end this 25 floors too early. Not that the number of floors did matter at any point before.
Kirito wakes up somewhere over Aincrad. Asuna is also there despite being, you know, dead. They watch the world crumble. Kayaba is there, too. The big bad that trapped 10000 players in the game where ultimately 4000 died, who founded the Knighs of the Bloodoath to lead the players through this world. What complex motivations does such an individual have that could explain all of this–
"You know, I don't even remember any more..."
Fuck Kayaba, Fuck Kawahara, Fuck SAO, and fuck Kirito too, for good measure.
That's not deep, that's fucking bullshit. Many people (me included) give Starlight flak for her weak motivations and backstory, but at least she had some! This! This right here is the moment Kawahara fails in basic story writing. He fucked up one of the most important parts of a villain.
There's some philosophical bullshit. Kirito and Asuna tell each other their real names, bla, bla, bla, it's really hard to care right now.
Kirito wakes up in a hospital and after 2+ years in a coma, he of course immediately stands up and walks into the light (because fucking symbolism) to find Asuna.
And this is not the end
Why is this not the end
Goddammit!
You... might want to leave just now. What you just described, the first part of SAO- that's the GOOD part. As in, I was actually into it for a while, but the Fairy Arc is hottest garbage of the worst kind- the long, drawn out, padded BORING kind. Run away, just stop, unless you make a youtube video and get some money off of it. And even then, people beat you to it.
Watch Hinamatsuri. It's fun.
The abridged series take on this bit almost makes up for the base material's utter laziness.
Fucking Bethesda.
I like SAO and I would say that you definitely shouldn't continue, this is the show at it's best and the next arc is when it's at it's worst. I mean the problem with this series is that you can't really top the whole 'Death Game' scenario. I do still like the later arcs (and the movie) and I'm sure I'll like season 3 but yeah just stop, if you didn't like the first half you aren't gonna like it period.
4858411
I might have overreacted just a bit. Wasting great potential is an easy way to get me to rant and then they wasted their villain in such a lazy way. I'm pretty sure with the next one I'll get back to the dumb jokes.
I've only seen the first episode, but yeah Hinamatsuri is fun, I definitely have to get back to that one.
4858441
Yes, it totally does. Sadly I have already caught up with it.
4858462
After watching Alternate Gun Gale Online (which is really good) I'm actually curious about the original GGO and I heard Mother's Rosario is good. I just have to get through Fairies, Incest & Tentacles to reach it. I'm also very proud and refuse to be beaten. This was (hopefully) a one time thing.
4858441
"You know, I don't even remember any more..."
"WHAT? ARE YOU SERIOUS?"
"Ha, no! Can you imagine how unsatisfying that answer would be after two years of hell? Hehe... no, I did it for Metacritic."
4858627
Yeah I admit Mother's Rosario is actually pretty good, it's also one of the only arcs that doesn't star Kirito... But I'm sure that's just a coincidence.
4858713
Yeah... just a coincidence... probably the same coincidence that makes SAO Alternative: Gun Gale Online so great