Skype Chat Silliness #4: A New Joke

In celebration of finally getting my end of a really silly bet out of the way, I figured I would complie another round of silly short pieces that I made while sitting in a skype chat.

???: "Halt you Vile Fiend! I come in the name of Celestia, Goddess of the Sun, to put an end to your attacks on the innocent ponies of Ponyville! Step away from those ponies!"
RD: "What do you mean a monster! These are my best friends and they would never do something like that!"
???: "You cannot even see the Vampony that stands in your midst? Or have you fallen under her spell? I cannot allow you to carry on Vampony! I am here to give you the stake you deserve!"
Applejack: "Now take it easy there partner, no need to go cracking your whip at anypony. Can't we work this out without this big issue; like ya'll haven't even told us who you are talking about."
Pinkie: "Ooh Ooh!, Pick me! I would love to have a Stake."
Rarity: "Pinkie, the fine stallion is implying putting a stake through the heart of the vampony to kill it, not give it a gift."
TS: "You haven't even told us who you are accusing, and you are saying Princess Celestia sent you? Why didn't she notify me about your pending arrival, mister?"
???: "I am Belmont Stakes, The Royal Vampire Slayer. The Princess did not send word ahead as she was unsure which of you was the vampony, and she couldn't risk warning the foul beast of my coming. I have been watching you for some time and I have finally solved that mystery, and the vampony is there!"
Rarity: "Why is everyone looking at me? I can promise you that I am not a vampony, I could never live with myself if I could never see my reflection again, and pale is tacky this season."
TS: "What? How can you be anything but pale? Your coat is white, you can't get any paler than that?"
Rarity: "Oh shush. Still I am still not a vampony."
FS: "...I think he may mean me..."
Belmont Stakes: "That’s right vampony, there is no use continuing to deny the truth."
Mane6: "WHAT!?"

---

Princess Celestia: "It is certainly wonderful hearing just how much you have learned. I think those are all great lessons, but perhaps it would help your studies to consider the phrase 'What road does a Pony walk that never comes to an end'."
Twilight Sparkle: "Yes... Yes Princess! I will get started on that immediately!"

1 Week later
Princess Luna: "Tia, you cannot honestly have had no idea that your task for Twilight wouldn't have had at least one of these issues arise!"
Tia: "How was I supposed to know that she would miss the obvious answer and lead to these minor inconveniences."
Luna: "Minor? You call releasing discord, turning hundreds of acres of farmlands into roads, before starting a full blown succession crisis with a disproportional big crater!"

---

Discord: "Good job Pinkie! I would be surprised if anypony could fit in there, even you. It looks like my doubts were misplaced, as you managed to rent the storage room without question, smuggle all of this in without being noticed, and wired it up perfectly. Now all you need to do is light up the fuse and get back before you can lead Equestria into a bright future free from those stuffy old Princesses!"
Pinkie: "Okie Dokie Lokie"

---

Blueblood: "...and in order to cover the budgetary shortfalls for increasing the Royal incidental costs fund by %100, it is a simple matter of increasing taxes on the middle class by 10% and reducing farm subsidies by..."
Princess Luna: "Tia, do they always rattle on like this when they know we are going to reject their request?"
Princess Celestia: "Unfortunately. They think they might convince us to agree, or get us to grant it to just make them shut up..."
*KABOOM"
Luna: "Tia?"
Celestia: "Yes, Lulu?"
Luna: "What is this goop that we presently find ourselves covered in?"
Celestia: "Hmmmm... based on the taste I would have to guess cake batter, a fairly fine chocolate cake mix to be specific."
Luna: "And where did our nephew go?"
Celestia: "I think that is him stuck to the ceiling struggling to get out. He's going to be in for a surprise when he does."
*PLOP*

---

Discord: "..."
Pinkie: "There, everything is done. Did you like it?"
Discord: "What!? You put cake batter in all of those things!"
Pinkie: "Of course I did, what else would I put in there? It wouldn't be fun if somepony got hurt."
Discord: "Fine you win, I give up. You are too chaotic for me, which is really saying something."