• Member Since 24th Jan, 2015
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I live life deliciously.

More Blog Posts71

  • 8 weeks
    Zero Hour! (1957)

    I get the feeling that Princess Luna has the worst job out of the princesses. I'm not talking about raising the moon and getting no real credit for it because apparently every horse in the land goes to bed at a sensible time. By the way what is a sensible time? I say go to bed when you're tired. Who cares if it's 10 pm or seventy five hours from now. But I digress.

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    5 comments · 35 views
  • 21 weeks
    Guess Who Had the Covid-19

    It was the end of March and I felt weird. Not the normal weird that seems to follow me day in and day out but sick weird. Sometimes I felt warm, sometimes I had chills but mostly I was tired. So, I did the thing any normal person would do, I went to the doctor. However, if you guessed that I went to the beach and partied until I embarrassed all the teens and twenty somethings I'd have

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    7 comments · 55 views
  • 40 weeks
    The Lighthouse (2019)

    Is it just me or should they have not reformed Diamond Tiara? I know it's something that was done awhile ago but when you look at Cozy Glow it's really just Diamond Tiara who's playing a bit more of the long game. I think it would have worked out better.

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    5 comments · 69 views
  • 49 weeks
    Werewolves on Wheels (1971)

    Today I was at a thrift store. I'm not quite sure why I was there. It just seemed to be that I ended up there. Anyway, I was going through the pants looking for loose change when all of a sudden I saw a man. He was wearing a shirt that said Nantucket's Finest.

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    8 comments · 83 views
  • 52 weeks
    The Dead Pool (1988)

    So, it's been a few months since I've posted or really said anything here. How's it going? Hopefully you're doing well and life hasn't been too much of a booger. If it has, well, in the most general of ways I hope that you are able to see your way through whatever it is.

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    7 comments · 81 views

Zootopia (2016) · 9:36am Mar 10th, 2016

Changelings. They can turn into all sorts of ponies. I often wonder though why it is we never see them transform into anything else. I mean I think it would be hilarious to see one look like the last box of cereal on the shelf and when some kid goes to grab it it transforms last second into Flim who then tips his hat and slowly walks away.

In a way we already have something like that here with Panzermadels: Tank Dating Simulator. Sure you may think you're dating your typical high school girl but in reality they are all tanks. Ever try to get to second base with a Tiger 1? Better say you enjoy her amphibious attachments first. Think you can woo a Type 3 Chi-nu? Better get ready to be supportive if Leichttraktor wins student council president. In a way our world is not all that different than that of Equestria. Here we can date Tank Girls there they have bugs that become ponies. Seems legit.

I have no real segue here. Zootopia came out recently to wide praise from both critics and audiences alike. It's being called things like, great, ...classic, complex, beautiful and hilarious. One person said it was this generation's The Lion King. Many other critics have said that it had a message of tolerance and empowerment, especially for little girls.

Well, the movie is about a young rabbit named Judy Hopps who desires to be a police officer. Her parents are nervous about this prospect but, she's determined to make it happen and through intense training she manages to do so. She's not accepted at first due to the fact that she's small (more on that in a second) but as the movie progresses she gets to where she has to go through smarts and hard work. The movie ends as expected.

I smiled at this movie. It was a polite smile but, a smile none the less. I didn't have a bad time while watching the movie, and yet there were things that bugged me about it that I couldn't quite put my finger on until while at work it dawned on me just what it was that bothered me. For all of the talk about how complex and great this movie is, it's really nothing more than a disneyfied watered down version of the Nick Nolte/Eddie Murphy film 48 Hours.

Seriously, if we look at the beats of the main plot it's 48 Hours. The cop forces the con to help them because the con knows something and the cop is holding something over the con's head. The con helps out but is also just screwing with the cop too. On occasion the cop says something racist toward the con, and the con fires back but they both become friends because neither one "really means it." In both movies they literally have 48 hours to solve the crime. In both movies the head police guy balls out the cop and the con comes to the cop's defense and they split. In the end everyone sort of gets what they want except for the main villain who loses. Throw in references to movies and shows like Speed, The Godfather, Breaking Bad and a few others and yeah the movie isn't that complex. It's more of a check list.

I don't know how the movie is empowering for girls. I mean this is the same stock spunky girl with a can do spirit we've seen a zillion times before. I guess if they haven't seen this character before and they really connect with her I could see it. Of course the real problem Judy faces is that she's small and not because she's a female.

This of course begs the question of who patrols mouse town? I mean, do all of the rodents just naturally get along perfectly? Who writes the parking tickets in mouse town specifically? With so many mice wouldn't that mean more revenue for Zootopia's police department. Wouldn't you want really tiny officers to be there to get that cheddar? I mean most of what the police do is traffic enforcement and paperwork.

While the movie itself isn't particularly original from a story or character perspective it does offer some very pretty and colorful visuals. The characters, while not original are likable. Judy and Nick have great chemistry. The side characters fulfill their roles quite well and the direction is fairly tight. There are numerous sight gags and the occasional animal joke that was cute.

Let me be clear, I don't hate this movie. It's likable and the leads are ultimately sweet. I wouldn't turn it off if it popped up on my television and I had nothing better to do. However, it's not complex (the villain is pretty obvious) and I can't see it being anymore empowering than the last dozen or so empowering movies that came out.

It's a nice movie that most kids and parents will probably enjoy. There's nothing wrong with that. Personally I'd rather watch 48 Hours or Speed, but I wouldn't let an eight year old watch those movies. I guess in the end we all have our niches to fill. Zootopia fills its family movie niche well. It's not however, the best thing since best things.

stats: 0 dead bodies, 0 breasts (duh), 1 can do Rabbit, 1 crafty Fox, 1 song sung by Shakira, Popsicle fu, pop culture fu, Sloth fu, howling fu.

Shout outs:
Ginnifer Goodwin as Judy Hopps for saying, "We rabbits are good at multiplying."
Jason Bateman as Nick Wilde the con-fox who helps her out and says things like, "It's called a hustle sweetheart."
Idris Elba as Chief Bogo for the reference to another frosty Disney movie.

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Comments ( 8 )

So would you rather watch this or Killer Clowns from Outer Space?

3801004 It would depend on what I was in the mood to watch at the time. I mean, if I'm in the mood to watch The Thin Man or Key Largo I'm going to watch one of those movies. If I'm I feel like watching Humanoids From the Deep I'll watch that one. The same logic applies to the two you mentioned as well.

Currently though I'm in the mood to eat a sandwich. However later on I might throw on Raising Arizona.

Here we can date Tank Girls there they have bugs that become ponies.

date Tank Girls there

Tank Girl

Tank Girl

I think i found the next movie your going to review.

I'm cautiously optimistic about this one, and probably moreso for having read your review. I feel like a lot of attention gets paid to the concept of "making kids' movies engaging for parents too." But really good kids' entertainment doesn't have to play on that axis, because they don't assume anyone in the audience is an idiot or destined to be bored.*

* (See also: MLP FIM)

Ah Hudsucker Proxie for me or Ladykiller if your going Cohen brothers.

3801411 Tank Girl? But I have Sky Sharks and a case of Poultrygeist that may need attention!

3802582 I liked The Hudsucker Proxy as well. Wasn't as keen on their version of The Ladykillers though.

3801803 I agree with that. I think that someone should make the story, movie whatever that they want to make. Now if it can be refined to make it stronger than that's fine but, generally the whole test audience thing usually seems to lead to weaker stories.

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