Still Alive · 7:19am Feb 18th, 2016
Just wanted to put myself out there and to tell people, I'm still participating in fiction. Even some non fiction work such as reviews and the like. The thing is, the past two years or so have been eventful, but in sometimes subtle ways. For the longest time I thought my internal battles to be useless effort from someone who cannot even manage a single task without aggrandising episodes of self pity. As creative as my writing is, even more so was my logic and reasoning to justify self loathing and defeatism.
One of the things I learned while fighting the more negative sides of myself is this: negativity, self loathing, defeatism. They are self fulfilling prophecies we use against ourselves. The more effort we put in our efforts against ourselves, the more we believe it, and the more true it seems. It becomes.
I'm coming to terms with the idea that such thoughts and feelings are useless, and have little bearing in my life. What purpose does it serve to say to myself that I'm bad at something? If I, instead, focus on always improving, then where is the point in that negative energy that will only hold me back in the end? I'm not exactly going to get better feeling sad and doing nothing. Though it is tempting to give into the negativity. I can feel that particular monster rearing its head, asking questions that my mind automatically wants to answer.
I'm getting better, though. Part of getting better is writing more, fighting back the dark thoughts that are hiding in the shadows of my mind. They are no longer a welcome companion.
Hello everyone. What's up?
Hello there!
3762926 Yeah, lokeemee I posted a freaking blog. Does that make me cool yet, Merc?
3763732
Write like 50 more and we'll talk, nerd