• Member Since 1st Sep, 2015
  • offline last seen Apr 9th, 2017

The Minister of Scones

"You can use that cupboard over there labelled 'Good French Things'. It's empty."

More Blog Posts41

  • 155 weeks
    All About Threats

    I read that scientists, by using magnets, had 'turned off' the threat centres in people's brains, and that this made them 'change their attitudes towards immigrants.' Obviously, the stunning revelation that people don't like immigrants because they feel threatened by them is one that will echo down the ages as a revelation made possible only by scientific brilliance, but given that such

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    2 comments · 252 views
  • 158 weeks
    A Blog Post But as Soon as I Start Getting Grumpy I Stop Typing

    One thing I've noticed a lot of around YouTube recently is videos with 'X but Y' titles. You know, things like 'Dragon Ball Z but every time we see people screaming at each other in a desert the video speeds up', or 'Last Christmas I Gave You My Heart but it's a Pokemon boss-battle theme'. With this in mind, is there any chance of seeing 'Star Wars II: Attack of the Clones but every time Hayden

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    1 comments · 222 views
  • 159 weeks
    An American Fail?

    Apparently the British satirical magazine Private Eye is now listed on numerous 'fake news' sites for having covers like this:

    This, coupled with the existence of the show Friends, leads me to the conclusion that comedy is a largely unpractised art in the USA.

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    13 comments · 271 views
  • 161 weeks

    I've seen the phrase "Don't read it if you don't like it!" written on quite a lot of fanfictions lately. Granted, I've been seeking out the truly awful ones (sorting the chaff from the wheat, as it were) for my personal collection, so that might explain why I've seen so much of it. Read on for my thoughts.

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    6 comments · 367 views
  • 162 weeks
    50(ish) Followers!

    As I've reached 50 followers, here's a thank you video. Well, slideshow with me talking over the top. Don't quibble, Horatio. A lot of this seems to be because Somepony Tries to Sell Twilight Insurance has just been posted on FIMFiction as part of the Royal Canterlot Library collection. I am, understandably, chuffed to bits.

    3 comments · 200 views

Merry Christmas, Everyone · 2:11pm Dec 24th, 2015

I'll probably be busy for most of tomorrow, so I'll take this opportunity to wish a merry Christmas and a happy new year to each and every one of you. Except you. Yes, you. You know who you are.
I'm not an awfully good writer, and I've not got as much time on my hands as I'd like, so I'm not going to attempt a Christmas story (maybe next year), but I might as well at least bring a little festive cheer to the world. Christmas is an awfully busy time of year in the Crumb Kingdom, where The Ministry of Bakery and Confectionery, otherwise known as The Great Bakehouse, is located. Aside from my usual duties of accruing ingredients for vast quantities of scone-based revelry, this year, I've been tasked with dealing with the gingerbread overheads, as my dear friend Sir Rumford Roobly, The Minister of Gingerbread, has been taken ill. Come to think of it, that happens most years. Hmm... Anyhoo, the stress of dealing with the aforesaid gingerbread overheads has left me seeing red, and the raisin audits have come in late again, which is getting beyond a joke.
On the bright side, the dimensions are in phase again, so I should be able to explore the ponyverse to a greater extent than ever!* Stay tuned,
Ever yours,
-The Minister

*And I mean that exclamation mark.

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