New! From Chineigh: One Hoof Death Boop · 12:02am Oct 1st, 2015
Based off this game:
Fused with MLP and Kung Fu Panda.
You will now read the narrative in Kung Fu Master voice...
*From this point on, you will read the thread in Old Kung Fu Master Voice*
Derpy, when she was Younger, went on a trip of self-discovery, ended up in China in the valley of peace. She met Oogway, who saw great potential in her. So he trained her.
She didn't so much master techniques, but absorb them like they were a part of her. She developed the Lightning Dance, a composite style that was essentially a combination of every style taught in the Jade Palace.
She even learned to master the Split Sight, a technique that allows one to simultaneously keep track of two viewpoints in a fight, effectively making her worth two masters. These skills, on top of natural Pegasus reflexes and adorable nature earned her the nickname Boop, master of the Lightning techniques.Then... as in all kung fu movies... TRAGEDY struck!
The warlike Yaks attacked China, and The Emperor called upon Oogway and the members of the Jade Palace to repel them. So the masters fought, and all seemed fine until the Yaks finally decided to pull back. It was at this moment a problem was spotted with 'Boop'. The Yaks around her were not merely bruised and embarrassed, but broken and bleeding, with more dropping from her attacks every second. Yes, Boop, the Lightning Master, was annihilating the enemy without mercy.
When Master Oogway, suspecting she was simply lost in the fury of the fight, tried to alert her that combat had ended, he discovered it wasn't that she wouldn't stop. But she COULDN'T stop. The Split Sight and the Lightning Dance were so ingrained into her natural Pegasus reflexes and magic that she was practically taking back seat to a martial-arts slaughter machine with her face on it. Popping the enemy like little bubbles with disturbing ease.
"I can't stop! I CAHAHANT STOOOP!"
It took three days of furious combat with Master Oogway himself before the old tortoise managed to exhaust the Pegasus enough to lock her nervous system up. Three days while both the Chinese and terrified Yak armies watched 'Death Boop' as the Yaks had started to call her. But Oogway prevailed, 'Boop' a sobbing mess.
"I... I just... don't know what ... what went wrong. I... I couldn't s-stop."
Two countries convened at a summit the next day, while the Yaks retreated to Yakistan to hide from the 'One Hoof Death Boop'. Equestria met with China, the sad story of the fight told. But aside from Trauma, Derpy, the One Hoof Death Boop, was unharmed. She was taken in, given care, and sent some place quiet, Ponyville, where her natural talent for bare-hoofed destruction could be passed off as clumsiness.
And has lived quietly there ever since...
PO: ... So you're telling me, that you trained a second Tai Lung, right here in the Jade Palace, and we never saw her at all?
Shifu: Po, it was twenty years ago, and she mastered everything in six months.
PO:... How-Is that even POSSIBLE?
Shifu: I trained you well enough to be the Dragon Warrior in a few weeks with Tai Lung's arrival imminent...
PO: Point... So, when do we go get to see her? She must be aweso-
Shifu: NO!... Er- ehem. No, Po. One Hoof Death Boop is best left alone. She was never proud of what happened, and Celestia told us that she wouldn't stop sobbing for weeks. You have to understand. She didn't merely lose control, she slaughtered an army by accident. An army that only needed to be given a few black-eyes and sent running. It destroyed her as much as she destroyed them.
PO: Wait, so all that talk of blood and the whole death thing in her title-
Shifu: The title is not a mere grant of respect. In the last four-hundred years, there hasn't been a single master with the head-count to match Boop. Tai Lung was a menace... Boop would have annihilated him and kept going. Even your ability to absorb so much punishment wouldn't but slow her down for a few seconds.
PO: Well, maybe but we could use the Wuxi Finger Hold-
Shifu: You should know very well that the Finger Hold does not work on a creature that doesn't have fingers.
PO: Oh... Oh yeah.
Shifu: But enough about it. I don't know why you would even CONTEMPLATE it. Boop is not a master we need to disturb from what life she recovered. Not even for a friendly 'for old times sake' sparing match. It would bring back too many sour memories at best. At worst... Well, I have no desire to witness One Hoof Death Boop for a second time. Once in my lifetime was enough. And this time, there is no master Oogway around who could hold her onslaught at bay long enough to stop it. Let sleeping giants lie. Now... Pack your things. The Canterlot Summit is in a week. And pack the discrete meats. Ponies are skittish.
And I'm just imagining Derpy in a Chinese dress and one of those huge straw hats. I have found this image... nowhere. I want to see Derpy looking like an adorable Chinese master. Readers! Convince the artists! We need more kung fu master derpy!
And now 'Boop's' theme.
I so want this to be a story!!!!
... I would read this. I would read this a lot. fc03.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/363/d/4/clapping_derpy_hooves_icon_by_shroomehtehponeh-d5pm8c9.gif
Wait so who trained Derpy? Po is implying Shifu did it, but the text prior says Oogway did.
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Ever heard of a 'collective' you?
Sequel please?
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Point taken
Sequel idea?
Villain want's to cause chaos, kidnaps Dinky. OHDB must now learn control over her technique if she ever wants to get her kid back without wrecking everything in sight.
Need to do some research first if I wanted to do a picture. That and put it in the queue I have for art. Still trying to figure out what the heck a griffon would look like when being headbutted.
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When in doubt, look to a technique used in shounen comics. Have the body forming a deep 'V' around the point of impact, closed end in the movement direction of the blow.
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Even if it's a head-to-head collision?
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Study some shounen comics. You don't have to follow the laws of physics, and super-deformity means more than just chibi-bodies and bug-eyes.
In a static image, your goal is to create the sense of movement. A head-butt could be shown at impact, with the flesh molding around the attacker's forehead, or just a microsecond after, with action lines signifying the blow, and the character that just got struck back super-deforming away from the strike. (In the case of a blow on the end of the body, you'd have one arm of a 'V', and a blank space, because the face is the crook of the V.)
I would love to read this.
*read in season 5 promo guy`s voice*
In a world, ravaged by the Yakistani horde, one mare is all that stands in the way of totals
dedtruction. She is Muffins, the One Hoof Death Boop.