Dragonball Z has the best fan fiction.

Chapter 2: The Gathering of Vegeta

Last time on Dragonball Z, Goku and Krillin set off to find their friends. When Krillin found Tien, poor Chousu was dead!
“And… choke slammed him through a brick wall. He laughed, and said, ‘What’s the matter you stupid clown? Did I break your imaginary box?’ Then he picked Chousu up , smacked him around a bit, and cracked his back with a back breaker. After that, he gave him a roshambonie and sent him to the next dimension.”
(Back to our hero, Goku)
“What the heck is that? It sounds like Chi Chi.”
“I said NOOO SNACKS AFTER STUDYING.” Screamed Chi Chi.
“Ouch! Gohan got it bad. I’m not even half way there, and I can still here her big mouth. Why did I have to choose a woman with such an annoying scream? Aw well, gotta speed it up a bit!”
(1/2 hr later)
“We will, we will rock you,” says Goku as he sings to himself.
(Goku senses a huge power level nearby)
“I guess I have time to check it out.” (Vegeta is at a nearby gym)
Vegeta was pumping iron, when suddenly he sensed Goku nearby.
”Well..Well..Well.. if it isn’t Kakarot.” Says Vegeta. “This would be funner than I had expected. I better just leave though, I have a plan.”
(Goku lands and finds the place deserted)
“I think my senses might be leaving me” says Goku. Suddenly, Vegeta appears behind Goku and taps him on the shoulder.
“Vegeta” says a shocked Goku, “Your still alive. Listen, I need to talk to you.”
(Back to Krillin, Yamcha, and Tien)

“It’s all right. Chousu wasn’t much help at all anyway.” Says Krillin.
Tien says, “I guess your right Krillin. We don’t need him. He’s just a small, dumb, little nerd. I caught that pervert sniffing my ass one time. I’m telling you, he’s a homo.”
“Yuck! When we get the dragonballs, remind me not to wish him back.” Says Krillin.
(Suddenly, Yamcha’s pants fall )
“OH NO!!! Only one evil fend could do such a thing.” Says Yamcha. (He turns around and yells to Chousu) “ I had enough of you Chousu. FART POWER activate.”
“FART MEHA MEHA!” (Yamcha’s fart knocked the gay little guy to the next dimension)
“Dog.” Krillin said, “Your fart stinks more than a dirty cock!”
(Back to Goku, Vegeta, and Goku’s talk with Vegeta)
“I can’t believe this! Your back!” says Goku, “ Wait a second. Aren’t you on Frieza’s side?”
“Shut up fool, Frieza’s men might be around here!” says Vegeta.
“So your not on their side?” asks Goku.
“Of coarse not. Why would I follow a pink loser around all day?”
“ I don’t know.”
“Listen up Kakarot, I’m only saying this once so listen up! Frieza’s got more men with him.”
“What! Oh great! This is exactly what I wanted to hear!” Yells Goku.
“ There is Nappa, Racoom, and Zarbon.” says Vegeta angrily.
“Listen Vegeta, I’ll let you make a wish on the dragonballs if you help us fight Frieza.”
“There is no need to worry! Frieza had Raditz on his side, but I Killed him.” says a proud Vegeta.
“No way! You actually killed Raditz?” asks Goku.
“Yes! How many times do I have to tell you Kakarott? Raditz is a puny weakling.” Says Vegeta, “ The one you call Bulma, was attacked by Raditz. My future wife had no way of defending herself.”
“What? Future wife?” asks Goku.
“Let me finish my story, fool.” says Vegeta, “As I was about to say, as I was rudely interrupted, is that I caught that fool attacking my wife. I flew behind Raditz and tapped him on the shoulder. When he faced me, I blasted him with my hands. This amazing technique of mine, sent him in the air. And from there, I sent him to another dimension.”
(Meanwhile, Krillin, Yamcha, and Tien stare at the dead Chousu in shock)
“My… my only friend. How could you do this to him?” Screamed Tien.
(Krillin smacks Chousu with a stick)
“Fuck that stupid clown. We were better off without him.” Says Krillin.
“I guess your right. Lets go!” yells Tien. (They all gather energy and blast off to find Goku)
“We have been flying for hours man! Where is he?” asks Yamcha. (Suddenly, Krillin senses a high power level)
“No, not Frieza…. Um… Then who can it be?” Thinks Krillin.
(Piccolo appears out of nowhere and forces the 3 to collide and fall to the ground)
“You asshole! Get the fuck off my nuts.” Screams Yamcha.
“Don’t look at me!” says Krillin. (Tien looks innocently)
“Enough! What are you all doing here?” asks Piccolo.
“We are trying to find Goku, but can’t. Have you seen him lately?” asks Krillin.
“Yeah! I told that loser to go fuck himself and that I’m not helping him.” (Tien clones himself 10 times and Krillin and Yamcha power up)
“Tisk…tisk…tisk… Don’t you know? We eat punks like you for breakfast!” says Yamcha. (Tien clones himself 30 more times to form 40 Tiens. Then he surrounds Piccolo) “Faggot, faggot, faggot…” chants all of the Tiens.
(Piccolo goes nuts and fires all around himself- multi ki- blasts @ Tien)
(On the ground knocked out cold is Tien)
“ Smooth move you dickless little pansy.” Says Yamcha.
“JERK!” yells Krillin. (Krillin forms a distructo disk and fires it at piccolo’s chest)
“The pressures on B-I-O-C-H!” said Krillin. “Ha,Ha! I will let it hit me. This little toy can’t hurt a fly.” Laughs Piccolo.
( The disk cuts him in half) (After that, they blast off again, to find Goku)
(Now back to the conversation of Goku and Vegeta)
“Now let me get this straight. You want me to join you? And what do I get out of this whole thing?” asks Vegeta.
“Let’s see. You can sleep with my wife, she is a slut, or I can arrange a date for you and Bulma. And let’s not forget, you could have a wish from one of our 3 wishes that comes from the dragonballs.” Answers Goku.
“OK Kakarot. You have a deal.” (Goku and Vegeta blast off)
(At Goku’s house)
“Gohan, are you studying your math?” asks Chi Chi.
“Yes. But I’ll finish studying later. I sensed evil powers a while ago. I have to go help dad fight them.”
“No you won’t. You sit your big ass back down and study.”
“Suck It.” Says Gohan.
“WHAT???” yells Chi Chi (Gohan walks out the door)
“ Get your big ass back here right now!” Screams Chi Chi
(Goku and Vegeta hear Chi Chi’s scream)
“What the heck is she drinking?” asks Goku. (Krillin, Yamcha, and Tien all hear Chi Chi’s scream as well)
“What the heck was that?” asks Tien “It sounds like Chi Chi taking a dump.” Laughs Krillin
“I want to watch.” Cries Yamcha
“What the fuck are you on? It’s cocaine isn’t?” asked Tien.
“No! You don’t like women do you?” (Tien doesn’t say anything. He just stares at Yamcha)
“Aw man! That’s sick.” says Yamcha
“Yamcha, I never realized how attractive you looked.” Says Tien.
“Stay away from me!” orders Yamcha.
“Both of you, shut the fuck up.” Orders Krillin.
“No! Your jealous. I have the sweet ass. I can’t help it.” Says Yamcha.
“Why do you like women? Men are better looking.” Says Tien.
“Shut up Homo!” Says Krillin.
“But Krillin, I never realized how ugly and unattractive you are. Even homos won’t go out with you. No one likes a 6 dotted, crappy clothed, bald idiot who has a small dick.”
“Um… Let’s go.” Says an embarrassed Krillin.

… Will Vegeta turn on Goku? Will Gohan find the group in time to lend a hand? And what about Tien? Is what he said about Krillin true? Find out in our next exciting episode of Dragonball Z…