My standards are way too high :\ · 12:34am Jan 15th, 2015
In lue of my epic defeat at the hands of my own dopple ganger, I've become more self aware of the glaring issues that plague me as a writer. My standards are too high for what I can accomplish. What I want to write is an epic battle themed story with all sorts of cool magic that isn't stupidly over powered like it is in canon. What I don't want to do is use the standard pony models though, because writing a pony story focused on fighting where intricate movements are pretty much impossible to write considering I, myself, am not a pony, is hard. Basically this means I want to change how the world works, and make everyone a human.
After my attempts to write a story like this, it became clear I couldn't alter character personality at all or people would call bullshit. In an unreleased fic titled "Restructuring Magic" I gave Spike a larger role in the story. To do this, I had to change the way he was brought up and if Psycology taught me everything, Nature Vs Nurture is a very real thing. Thus Spikes personality would be different had he been treated differently when he was younger. I wasn't grilled to hard for it, but I felt really bad when some pointed out that Spike was acting OoC. When the only responce I could come up with had to do with him not being the same spike you once knew, I figured out that I wasn't writing a pony fanfic, I was writing my own story with their names.
okay great, now we're basically just telling a story with only names preserving it's place as an MLP fanfic. I could call my main character Twilight, give her Twilights general appearnce and personality and plop her into the story, but wouldn't it just be easier to get rid of the pony tie all together if I was going to change Everything? Might as well write a proper story of my own at that point right? Then I wouldn't be writing myself into a corner, forced to work with characters that might not have a place in the story I'm wanting to tell, like for instance, Rarity. I love her to death, she's my second fav, but she's too damn difficult to write for. At least for me. That's not to say I can't write for her, but sometimes I think it's be easier not to. But you can't have an epic pony fanfic centered around Twilight without all of the main 6 showing up can you? I don't think so.
Then we also have the issues of my own unending need for praise and recognition. Let's be honest here, every half baked writing posts their work online hoping to get noticed but it doesn't do dick all to help them. Everyone blows over a story like that, and no one would be willing to stick around for new installments and chapters of a story that likely won't ever finish. Even if I had a proper publisher, the same effect will happen. Very few will pick it up because very few will be looking, at least on any site that offers new writers the chance to get their work out. That said, my absolute need for this aspect when writing guides my hands and mind into writing strictly pony fanfics because everyone and their mum reads 'em. I'd get some response from the comunity about how shitty and awful my work is. Or, on the off chance I'm not an incompetent twat who can't tell her spell checker from her thesaurus, I'd get praise for a job well done.
That said, it's not as if I don't like writing pony fanfics, I just simply can't write a huge epic narative with interesting battle mechanics. I can't reshape how magic works to fit my ideal no bullshit clause I like to tack onto everything I work on. Not because it's impossible, but because I don't really want to write detailed fighting scenes using quadropeds. It's also easier to show emotion through human body language. I have no idea how horses use body language, so writing in extra emotions like that won't work. Even if I did the research about it, those who read my work won't really get it. Not unless you're a devoted horse savant. Or I guess just know about horses. In any case, the circumstances are pretty dire. Not much I can do about anything.
anyway, no one will read this, so that's all I'll say now.
Try writing something small first, you would be suprised how emotional a short story that has been worked on can make you feel so much, such as this one, this one, or this one all written by friends of mine that although short, still got a good amount of fame and popularity over something they liked writing. Maybe you have a confidence issue and just need to get some more stories under your belt before doing epics.
Just do something you like, and don't forget, people are listening, even if you doubt it, and your standards are yours, and can never really be too high. You wanting to write a masterpiece instead of a fingerpainting just is a sign of growth.