My Little Snowflame: Cocaine is Magic (Ebonics Version) · 9:48pm Feb 8th, 2014
So, I put the original Snowflame in Equestria story through the ebonics translator and got this. Also, if anyone is offended by "the n word", I'm warning you now that it pops up a few times because of the program, and it's not in the original I assure you. This is also not meant to be offensive in any way and is meant for comedy, and if this is well received I may do more.
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Yo muh motha fuckin Little Snowflame: Cocaine iz Magic
By: KenSES64
Twilight wuz sitting in da libary reading uh mysterious spell she found. It wuz strange da book explained how ta perform it, but it didn’t say what it did. She decided ta tess it out anyways. Who know it could be helpful someday.
So she focused her magic at uh wall an' wif uh beam o' light uh blue an' whitey spiraling portal appeared. nuttin' seemed ta happen until uh figure fell out o' da portal landing on da floor. Walking up ta it, she noticed dat da creature wuz mostly hairless on it’s body, but still seemed ta gots uh mane dat wuz whitey. By da shape o' it’s body she assumed dat dis here creature mus' be bipedal. She then looked at da clothing it wuz wearing. It wuz uh tight red an' whitey sleeveless body suit. Finally she seen dat it so whitey face paint around it’s peeps.
Speaking o' it’s peeps dey snapped open. It quickly sat up an' looked at her.
“Uhh...yo muh motha fuckin name iz...” She began ta say 'bfoe getting interrupted.
“you be da Purple pony, Twilight Sparkle.” It said ta her.
“Y-You know who ah be?”
“yeea , Snowflame has seen yo' adventures wif yo' niggas an' thanks ta you Snowflame now know da Magic o' Friendship.”
“Uhh...What?”
“You see Snowflame now knows dat if you’re taking ova uh small Central American military complex, it’s mo' meaningful when you’re taking it ova wif uh nigga.”
“ah don’t think muh motha fuckin niggas an' ah gots ever taken ova uh military complex.”
“Really? Isn’t dat what Dragonshy wuz about?”
“Dragonshy?”
“When you go up dat mountain ta git rid o' dat dragon.”
“nahh...not at all.”
“Huh...So Snowflame wuz wrong...awww well. Now Snowflame wants ta meet da pink pony!”
“Pinkie Pie?”
“yeea , Snowflame demands dat you take Snowflame ta Pinkie Pie. Pinkie Pie iz bomb pony!”
Twilight felt uh weird mix o' emotions. Excited ta study uh new species, confused 'boutit’s rumblings an' uh little creeped out ta da fact dat it’s watching dem. Nether da less, she had uh lot o' questions ta ax.
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As dey walked through Ponyville dey seemed ta git some stares from da townspony, but thankfully nopony seemed ta be freaking out ova da new creature. Yet, she noticed dat Lyra gots uh huge grin on her face da second she seen Snowflame an' ran right up ta him.
“yo ah’m Lyra Heartstrings. ah’m wondering is you uh human?” She asked it.
“yeea ah Snowflame iz indeed uh human.” He answered.
“Ohmygosh! Ohmygosh! Ohmygosh! dis here iz officially da bomb day o' muh motha fuckin life!”
“Why iz dat?” Twilight asked her.
“ah finally git ta meet uh human, duh! ah waited muh motha fuckin whole life fo' dis here! You don’t know what you gots do you?”
“ah wuz going ta ax him some questions when we's gots ta Sugarcube Corner an'...awww we's’re here.”
da three o' dem walked into da bakery where Pinkie instantly jumped out o' da back room. “werd up Twilight! awww an' also werd up ta you Lyra! *Gasp* Who’s dis here new pony? ah mean ah can tell you not uh pony, but you still new. So...PARTY!” She said 'bfoe pulling her party cannon an' wif uh pull o' da string, da room wuz now all set up. “Okie dokie lokie, now ah just need ta invite everypony, until then here gots uh cupcake!” She said hoofing ova uh chocolate cupcake wif blue frosting ova ta him.
Snowflame just stared at it. “Snowflame will not just eat one. Snowflame will eat 50! At da same tyme!”
“awww Cupcake grubbin on contest, but who’s Snowflame?”
“ah be Snowflame! Every cell o' muh motha fuckin being burns wif whitey hot ecstasy! Cocaine iz muh motha fuckin god an' ah be da human instrument o' it’s will!”
“Okie dokie lokie. You’re on, but ah still gots ta invite ponies ta da party.”
“Snowflame will wait.”
Twilight an' Lyra bof turned ta Snowflame an' in unison dey bof asked. “What iz cocaine?”
Snowflame slowly gots uh grin on his face. “Snowflame has uh lot ta teach you cute an' cuddly ponies.” ______________________________________________________________________________
“So cocaine iz dis here whitey powder dat, at least fo' you, gives you special abilities known as super powers.” Twilight said.
“dat iz what Snowflame told you.” He answered her.
“Interesting. an' you’re from an alternate world take has some mo' advanced technology.”
“yeea , an' dat’s why ah know o' you ponies cuz we's made uh show 'boutyou an' yo' niggas.”
“ah still find dat uh little creepy.”
“ah don’t see anythin` wrong wif it.” Pinkie said bouncing up from da front do'.
“So Snowflame what tight powers do you git from Cocaine?”
“Super Strengf, Super Speed, Immunity ta Pain an' Snowflame gets whitey flames all ova his body.” He told her.
“tight. ah kinda wants ta try it now.” Pinkie said bouncing in da air.
Twilight an' Lyra exchanged uh peep o' concern. “Even Snowflame finds dat idea scary.” ______________________________________________________________________________
uh little while later da party began. 'bouttwo dozen ponies showed up, but all except Lyra kept they distance from Snowflame. Twilight didn’t think he mind cuz Lyra wuz asking him uh million an' one questions 'bouthis world an' humans. He seemed glad ta answer dem.
Pinkie pulled out uh tray dat had dozens o' different cupcakes on it. “Okay Snowfy is you ready fo' da cupcake grubbin on contest? ah mus' warn you ah’m da former Ponyville champion.” Pinkie said.
“Former?” Snowflame asked.
“Yeah dere wuz dis here one tyme Octavia wuz here wif uh unicorn stallion...ah don’t wants ta jive 'boutit.”
“Ready......GO!” Pinkie shouted 'bfoe da two o' dem started shoving several cupcakes in they mouths. Icing covering they faces. Shortly afta dey wuz all gone wif pinkie grubbin on 'boutsix mo' than Snowflame.
“Ha! ah win!” Pinkie shouted wif joy.
“pimp-tight motha fuckin job Pink...” Snowflame began ta say 'bfoe he grabbed da side o' his head uh fell ta one knee.
“is you okay Snowfy?” Pinkie asked concerned.
“Snowflame iz running low.” He answered.
“What do you mean?” Twilight asked.
“Snowflame needs mo' cocaine. Twilight can you reopen dat portal? Snowflame thinks he has ta go home.”
“awww okay.” Twilight then recast da spell dat brought da human ta Equestria.
Snowflame walked up ta da portal an' turned around waving. “pimp-tight bye ponies! Snowflame will think or you every tyme he eats uh cupcake or smoke’s uh superhero in da face.”
“What?” Twilight asked.
Snowflame didn’t answer her an' walked through da portal dat closed behind him. “What uh strange creature.” Twilight stated.
“He seemed fine ta me.” Pinkie said.
da END , wOrd!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n0IihzFoUlI
1812216
Ken did this because I sent this to him.
1812690 that's pretty great.
I have not laughed that hard in a long time. It was just hard to think of Snowflame's voice saying his words like that
