Reason for being late (it's legit) · 12:41pm Oct 14th, 2013

I know some of you are screaming their lungs apart for me to write a new chapter. I know it's been months of silence from my part, but to be frank, I have legitimate reasons to.

My parents have told me that they found a survey concerning ADD on the web, and that they found most of the symptoms apply to me. You can read the link here. ADD stands for Attention Deficit Disorder, and means that the affected has trouble remembering important events, procrasinating and pushing ahead or downright avoiding things they find boring/difficult. I'm inclined to agree with them, as I recognize myself in this situation. All these things have been a problem in the past, and it's getting worse the older I get and the more responsibility I have to take.

I know this won't change who I am, and I'm actually relieved to put a name on the difficulties I've had since I begun high school, but I'm worried this will affect me later in life. I might forget medical exams or even pay my bills if this goes unchecked, either because I forgot or simply because I impulsively can't deal with it out of laziness.

It's affected my writing too. I just don't find writing to be all that fun: it's a lot of work to me, and I often click up another tab to browse other stuff instead of actually concentrating on writing.

There are positive side effects of ADD: it stimulates creativity, and makes you achieve well in a few select things you really focus on. The problem is the lack of motivation/focus in other areas. This is my main problem with being on this site: I have tons of story ideas, but no will to actually put them on paper. I started writing Deus Ex: Equestria in a completely unplanned fashion when I was creatively stimulated, until my parents' divorce got increasingly complicated and i completely lost the will to write. This isn't limited to FimFiction: my school work took a heavy hit from this too. i don't think I've ever had lower grades than last year.

I've tried putting up a new chapter, I really have. I just can't write past 200 words without losing focus and doing something else instead.

Another side effect of ADD is that I easily grow irritable or even angry when things don't go my way. I don't think you realize how hellish writing those last few chapters of Friendship is Decayed was: I had to whip myself on into finishing past the deadline I had set upon myself. When my schedule was interrupted, everything just ground to a halt. Same thing for DE: Equestria: I completely lost interest after the first few chapters were posted. And then I see people writing nothing but "plz updeiiit" comments, and I get bouts of irrational fury that spring up. Mostly because I hate those comments, but also because I feel guilty for not finishing something I've begun.

I haven't clinincally been tested for ADD yet, but me and my family agree that I've shown the vast majority of traits that coincide with what that link above says. I'm going to talk to psychiatrists about my issue and have them help me. Until them, bear with me. I have issues beyond simply ADD, and writing about talking magical ponies isn't among my priorities right now.

So please, please don't post comments on my stories asking me to update all the time. It's an absolute hell to read through them, especially when I know I won't deliver. Go fav some other stories in the meantime.

TL;DR: I have ADD, I have no motivation to write, I'm getting help to deal with my issues. No ponies yet.

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