Let's Talk · 4:48am Sep 9th, 2013
And by "Talk" I mean I'm going to sit in front of my computer for a while a type things. Things that hopefully some of you will read. And that brings me to one thing I want to talk about. Currently, I have 46 watchers (HUZZAH). Currently, I'm lucking to get more than 15 views on a blog post. Believe it or not people, some of these are interesting and contain actual information. Information that is probably relevant to the stories you read of mine.
But that's just a small thing, a much bigger thing is that I NEVER GET ANY COMMENTS. Rarely, at least. A while back I put up a poll for the next story I should write. You wanna know how many people voted? 1. 1 person took the time to vote for a story they were interested in reading from me. People, if not for my stories then why did you follow me?
But I don't really mind that much, not at all, really, just something I felt like talking... er, typing about.
Another thing I wanna type about is my new laptop. My current laptop, the one I'm typing on right now, is an eMachine from 2005. And I bought it USED! Needless to say, it's old and kinda sucks. My new laptop is actually in the mail and is supposed to be here in a few days. It will be a joyous occasion, to be sure. Only $350 too, which is a pretty good deal for what I'm getting. Can't wait for that, I will celebrate by all the TF2 and Minecraft I can handle.
That's about it for my new computer. Here's another thing, After I'm done typing this I'll be writing yet another chapter of Rainbooms and Romance. I have A LOT of chapters for that already, and I need to do a lot of work for the contests I'm in, but for some reason I just really wanna right another fluffy thing, so I will. I think part of my current desire to write some diabetes-inducing fluff is because recently I've been getting pretty depressed. Not really sure why, but I have.
I was browsing through the new wallpaper compilation on EQD a few minutes ago and nearly started crying at the one with Rainbow flying over the mountain. No idea why or how, but for some reason that picture just made me really, really sad. And after that ever other pony picture I saw made me sad. Maybe it's because my mind suddenly realized that it's not real and it would never be real, even though I've always known that. And maybe it's just the fact that I've bee depressed and that picture somehow set me off.
I don't really know what the answer is, but what I do know is I want to be happy again, so I'm gonna write some feel-good Twidash. Good news for anyone watching that story.
Man, I don't know how all that sounded to someone other than the guy typing it, but here's hoping I don't sound like some... I dunno what I hope I don't sound like.
I don't know a lot of things right now. I don't know why that picture made me so sad, I don't know why I'm so depressed, I don't know when I'll next feel up to writing my contest fics. For now RR is the only thing I'm even physically capable of writing and I don't know why.
So many things I don't know.
I'm getting a new laptop; I should be thrilled.
I have 46 followers, I should be happy.
I don't know how many story views I have, but I should be pleased with the number.
And instead I'm sitting here, depressed, writing to you people about my personal problems. A bunch of strangers on the internet I'll never really know. A lot of people do it. Maybe because on the internet you can be anonymous and tell the truth. Maybe because you hope to find the one internet user who will actually try to help you.
Maybe because you don't care about the response, just as long as someone reads it.
Maybe as long as you get a single view on your tiny, insignificant blog post, you know that someone, somewhere knows. Someone took the time to read it. Maybe they didn't read all of it, but they read at least one word of your personal problems.
One word can make a world of difference. One word can change the world.
But enough of that, this is about talking, and that's just me ranting and getting philosophical, and that's somewhere I don't want to go right now. Maybe another blog post another time.
Right now I want to talk about the time. Right now, where I am, it`s 10:37 PM. Tomorrow morning I will wake up at 6:30 AM and go to school. The next day I will wake up at 6:30 AM and go to school. Same the next day, and the next day, and the next day. All school year, that`s how it will go. But right now it`s 10:38, and I don`t have to go to school. Right now it is still Sunday. Right now it is the weekend. The weekend is for relaxing, getting out of the monotonous daily humdrum of life and doing something fun, interesting even. And yet, I have a project due tomorrow that still isn't finished. I won`t have time tomorrow morning to do it, so I have to do it now. But right now, instead of doing that, I`m on a website for My Little Pony fanfiction talking to you, the reader.
Let``s talk about the reader. The reader can be anyone; you, me, the guy next door. They could be male, female, black, white, Asian, Mexican; it doesn't matter. The only thing that is required to make someone the reader is for them to be human with an internet connection. The internet is truly colour blind. Sure, there are places in the internet that are racist or sexist, but the internet itself is incriminatory. Anyone can have internet.
The internet is rarely a nice place, but there are safe havens for everyone. I like to think Bronies have created a rather large one, but there are still trolls amongst our ranks, defiling all that which we hold dear. But I hope those people are few and far in-between, and that we will take actions against them when they show their true colours.
There is a theory that people literally cannot control whether they are a hater or not. maybe it`s true, but I believe in free will. Everyone has choices. Maybe there is destiny, and maybe the choices we make are pre-determined, but at least we can think we have freedom. We can hope.
Hope is a very powerful emotion. Hope keeps people alive in the worst conditions on the planet. We all have hop of some kind, some more than ithers. But it`s still there.
I hope for a lot of things.
But I think I've typed long enough. Now I must write that RR chapter then finish my project for school. Thank you to anyone who reads this. Thank you to anyone who feels they want to comment. Thank you to anyone on the internet for simply being human. Even if you are a hater, or the scum of the internet, you are still human.
And for that, I thank you.
I... mostly don't comment on anything, I've been trying to break out of that... inherent shyness, yet usually I just don't have anything to say. All I can really offer is to not get yourself down, spirals of decent are hellish to break out of once you start, I've had a few myself. True, day to day school life is generally monotonous and incredibly draining, I myself don't really have the energy to do much during the school week. While hope is a double edged sword, it is both painful to have yet the source of true power and inspiration. Sometimes, the best thing to do is to just take a break, do something other than what you've been doing for a week or two then come back with fresh perspective.
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I normally avoid letting it get too far. hence why I'm writing some fluff as we speak. Can't really argue with you on any of the points you make.
Thanks for the comment, even if you don't normally have things to say, it's nice to know you'd try to say at least something.
Commenting is hard for me I don't interact we'll with people face to face and if I can't see someone's reaction I never know if I'm being to big of an ass. It also dosent help that I'm in Afghanistan wich is 9 1/2 hours ahead of American Eastern time so by the time I get to comment on what happened in America "yesterday" most conversations are over. I do know hat you mean about monotony though I wake up at 5am run for an hour eat write boring reports that no one reads go to lunch write more useless reports go to dinner then write more reports and then make time for ponies then bed at 10pm. In fact the only reason I know what day of the week it is is by what meal they make at the chow hall. The part that makes my day though is reading ponies especially the fluffy TwiDash.
I don't usually comment on fluffier stuff, but I'll always read fluffy twidash.