Subtle review: "Fallout: Equestria" · 9:11pm Feb 6th, 2013
Welcome to the first in a hopefully long-running series of reviews, where I give my opinion about stuff I've read in the way I am just about absolutely everything: very non-subtle.
First off: Fallout: Equestria (FoE). Ohyeah, there are gonna be massive spoilers, so if you plan to read it yourself, bail out NOW. Otherwise, enjoy my unorganized random.
Now, I've never played any of the Fallout games, nor have I any desire to do so in the future. And the first chapter was actually quite nice. Well, it doesn't stay that way. Nonono. The remaining 600.000 words are one massive rampage of massacres, battles, guns, and zombies. Preferably all at the same time, too, it seems, apart from the occasional very suggestive passage.
The pacing was high, and FoE isn't the sort of story I'm particularly inclined to like in the first place. In fact, because of this story, I've modified my PonyFictionVault challenge to exclude Dark and/or Tragedy stories in the future, simply because I do not like them. But that's for another blogpost, I'm already getting off-topic here. So I didn't like it. And still, I spent about 2 months of my life on this. Why?
The answer is simple: somewhere, hidden underneath all the annoying zombies (I really hate them), is actually a good story. Not an exceptionally good story plotwise (no... NO... not that plot...), but in terms of writing. Somehow, it managed to keep me reading; each time I put it down, I looked forward to the next time I could read a couple of thousand words. Even though it would be more of the same anyway.
At some point, I was actually beginning to like it. Still, I don't like it. Because in the last few pages, you know, the epic climax you read all the extra 1000 pages for? I think it sucked. Suddenly, it started switching between three points in time rapidly, very unlike the rest of the story. And it wasn't a very satisfying climax either. I wasn't expecting a happy ending or anything, but at least, you could have just made it, idunno, LONGER perhaps? It was over in like 20-30 pages.
One thing I did like though, was that I had the version from the PFV. It didn't have pictures, so at least I could use my own imagination. And in my imagination, the Enclave was HOT. Really hot, to be precise (it helped that they were pegasi). They had the sort of armor Rainbow had in that Christmas episode somewhere in season 2. And the hellhounds looked like this:
What the memory orbs looked like? That's right, Pokeballs. And I've never even watched Pokemon. I guess this is what made me continue reading, because it just added a touch of hilarity and unrealism, which was needed in a story where the main character survives about 10 times as much as a regular James Bond.
Considering how insanely off-topic I already am, I'm going to leave it at this. The last thing I want to say is: I understand why some people would like a story like FoE. Even I started to like it at some point. But it isn't a story upon which, when I see the cover, I will think back to with a smile.
tldr; 5/10 would not read again or anything like it.
Commenting on my own blog because I am too lazy to edit it: another reason why I even started reading it, would be because of the well-known rule: IT HAS PONIES. EVERYTHING GETS BETTER WITH THEM.
Bail'd. Well, I read the last two paragraphs. And the Pokemon card.
Have you read TTEOAP? I've never read a review on it, and I'm curious to see what others think.
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No I have not read that one. But I've put it on my list to maybe read someday (it's still Incomplete, and I already have a lot of Completed stuff). And if that day happens, I will review.