Friendship is Card Games: Moonstuck, Pt. 6

This week, it’s back to the Moon for more play-by-post fun with Woona.

Notably, smack in the middle of the covered portions is the beginning of Moonstuck’s end, the final arc that goes from random shenanigans that somehow form into a semi-coherent plot to an increasingly coherent plot with random shenanigans on the side. That means a bit of mood whiplash as rocs playing shell games with their ancient relic and super-sizing the Cartographer’s Cap to sail the lunar waterways give way to a bat pony almost drowning and Woona getting separated from all her companions, lost in a maelstrom and plummeting towards who-knows-where.

But hey, all that drama gives plenty opportunities for card concepts:

Point of No Return 1W
Sorcery
Exile all graveyards.
Draw a card.
“There are choices that cannot be remade, paths that cannot be recrossed, losses that cannot be recouped. Few know this better than I.”
—Princess Luna

Retrofit 2W
Sorcery
Return target creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield. It’s a Vehicle artifact with crew 3 and it loses all other card types. (It’s not a creature unless it’s crewed.)
Luna made a mental note to scrape off the barnacles before Echo saw the colts again.

Roosting Roc 4WW
Creature — Bird
Flying
Will of the council — When Roosting Roc enters the battlefield, starting with you, each player votes for nest or hunt. If nest gets more votes, put an indestructible counter on Roosting Roc. If hunt gets more votes or the vote is tied, put a double strike counter on Roosting Roc.
4/4

Echoing Vision 1U
Sorcery
Target creature and all other creatures with the same name as that creature can’t be blocked this turn. Until end of turn, they gain “Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, draw a card.”
A single prophecy unleashes a rush of claimants.

Razor School 2U
Creature — Fish
When Razor School enters the battlefield, you may return target green permanent or Forest to its owner’s hand.
Chopping down a tree with one herring is ridiculous. Chopping one down with a thousand is surprisingly feasible.
3/2

Occlusion Gambit 3UU
Instant
Exile target creature you control and the top two cards of your library in a face-down pile, shuffle that pile, then manifest those cards. (To manifest a card, put it onto the battlefield face down as a 2/2 creature. Turn it face up any time for its mana cost if it’s a creature card.)

Lost at Sea 4U
Instant
Put target nonland permanent on top of its owner’s library.
Adamant — If at least three blue mana was spent to cast this spell, put that permanent on the bottom of that library instead.
Causing the tides doesn’t give Luna any authority over the rest of the ocean.

Commune with Jam B
Sorcery
Choose a number between 1 and 6. You lose that much life, then look at that many cards from the top of your library. Put one of those cards into your hand and the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order.

Ulterior Motive 1B
Instant
Until end of turn, target attacking creature gains “Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, that player discards a card.” If you don’t control that creature, until end of turn, it instead gains “Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, that player discards that many cards.”

Dark Vortex 1BB
Enchantment
Delirium — At the beginning of your upkeep, each player mills two cards. Then if there are four or more card types among cards in your graveyard, each opponent loses 2 life.
Luna tore her eyes away from the cloud of shadows while she could. The memory still loomed over her for hours.

Patched Corsair 3B
Creature — Bat Pegasus Pirate
Flying
Patched Corsair enters the battlefield with a -1/-1 counter on it.
1B, Remove a -1/-1 counter from Patched Corsair: Target creature gains deathtouch and lifelink until end of turn.
“Not bad! I’ll need two eyes for you.”
4/3

Rousing Shanty 1R
Sorcery
Creatures you control get +2/+0 until end of turn. Pirates you control gain haste and menace until end of turn.
Each crew has their own war song. Between the nautical lingo, inside jokes, and rude euphemisms, no one else knows what they actually mean.

Fortune’s Favored 2RR
Creature — Noble
Alicorn (This card is also a Pony Pegasus Unicorn.)
Flying
If you would roll one or more dice, instead roll that many dice plus one and ignore the lowest.
If you would flip one or more coins, instead flip that many coins plus one and ignore one.
3/3

Audacious Diplomacy 3R
Instant
Cast this spell only during combat before attackers are declared.
All creatures attack this combat if able.
All creatures block this combat if able.
Sometimes foregoing decorum impresses the other dignitaries with a bold stance. Sometimes it just skips the pre-war talk.

Migratory Coconut 1G
Creature — Plant
Islandwalk (This creature can’t be blocked as long as defending player controls an Island.)
Whenever Migratory Coconut deals combat damage to a player, sacrifice it. If you do, search your library for a basic land card, put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.
3/1

Diplomatic Preparations 2G
Sorcery
Parley — Each player reveals the top card of their library. Distribute X +1/+1 counters among creatures you control, where X is the number of nonland cards revealed this way. Then each player draws a card.
It’s always wise to negotiate from a position of strength.

Megantic Monarch 5GG
Creature — Noble
Alicorn
Vigilance, reach
Other Ponies, Pegasi, and Unicorns you control get +3/+3.
Alicorns’ strong magic causes them to grow to unusual heights. Some more than others.
6/6

Cartographer’s Caravel 3
Artifact — Vehicle
Landfall — Whenever a land enters the battlefield under your control, put a +1/+1 counter on Cartographer’s Caravel
Crew 3 (Tap any number of creatures you control with total power 3 or more: This Vehicle becomes an artifact creature until end of turn.)
3/3

Double or Nothing UR
Instant
Flip a coin. If it comes up heads, copy target spell and you may choose new targets for the copy. If it comes up tails, counter that spell. (A copy of a permanent spell becomes a token.)
A certain chaotic whimsy permeates the Moon, making every spell a gamble.

Ancient Sanctity GW
Enchantment
Historic permanents have shroud and their abilities can’t trigger or be activated. (Artifacts, legendaries, and Sagas are historic. A permanent with shroud can’t be the target of spells or abilities. Sagas still get lore counters and are still sacrificed after the final chapter.)

Dramatic Retelling 1U(ub)B
Instant
Choose target nonland card in a graveyard that was put there this turn. You may cast that card without paying its mana cost.
Every story can use a few tweaks, especially the true ones.

Lunar Waterways
Land
When Lunar Waterways enters the battlefield, sacrifice it. When you do, search your library for a basic Swamp, Forest, or Island card, put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle and you gain 1 life.
They’ll get you somewhere in a hurry, but without a guide, there’s no telling where.

Comments

[Herald of Opera]

Inside Baseball Alert: I spot not one but two Monty Python jokes here. Knowing what I know about the ending twist of Moonstuck, aping a quest for the Grail is apropos.

Stupid Complicated Game Alert: Effects like Fortune's Favored are exclusive to legendary permanents in canon, because even the people who made the first one weren't sure how they'd stack and decided to kick the question down the road (although not for very long; the card that worked around this came out in the next block). The Rules Manager approved of this forethought and made it standard.