We need to talk about Into the Light. · 7:34pm Apr 10th, 2023
HELLO THERE. IT'S ME. The most inconsistent author on the platform! :D
Live footage of everyone's reaction when I come crawling back for the 5,000th time.
Let's talk about Into the Light. Firstly, I apologize.
You have been click-baited.
I'm not giving up on Into the Light, and I still have every intention of continuing to write it. At some point. HOWEVER. I do want to talk about how it's going and why it's taking so long.
See, normally this is the part where I tell you all I'm incredibly busy in an effort to excuse my inactivity, and while that is TRUE (more on that later) I also want to address a problem that has plagued many an artist; Perfectionism.
The Perfectionist Plague
I have fallen into the very same trap I started this story to avoid. I am being overly picky about every little thing. Chapter 9 in particular has haunted me for a long time, hence the hard-stop for so long. I wrote another fic, The Canterlot Cookie Caper, to hopefully shake off the rust and get my drive up again, but it wasn't enough to get past the pacing struggle of Chapter 9, which I'll talk about later.
What started as a little personal story just to give me a change of pace has turned into a monstrous and sprawling adventure with a deep and heavy root in philosophy and epistemology. Answer the question of "what it means to be creative" is not an easy task, especially to tackle in an all-ages story. It is an adventure I am still excited to write and still fantasize about while listening to music, but the scope of it has grown so large that I have come to dread the "middle" chapters; the point-a-to-point-b chapters.
Quite honestly, despite all my original works, I think Into the Light may be my magnum opus with what I have planned... if only I could wake up and stop being so hyper-critical. I am 90% sure I am seeing problems in my writing that literally nobody else will care about. "Oh, this emotional whiplash might be a bit much." "This feels a bit tonally dissonant with what happened 5 paragraphs ago." "Hmm, nothing exciting has happened this page..."
I read what I managed to get done for Chapter 9 before disappearing, and bloody hell, it's perfectly fine. It's a pattern I've observed before. After initially writing something, I sigh and think "man, when I go to edit, it's gonna be a lot of work", and then I read it the next day and all I have to do is make a few minor corrections or dialogue tweaks. If I could just remember that I could spend more time writing and less time fretting.
If any of you have advice for how to combat perfectionism and a lack of motivation... I would love to hear it. I've always been a bit of lone-wolf when it comes to storytelling, only trusting myself to know how to proceed and do things right, but I know many people have been through the same struggles as I. So let me know if you've found any techniques that work for you.
Too Much to Tell
My initial outline has failed me. I need more chapters before finishing part 1. Developing both a new character AND an entire culture has proven too difficult to fit into half a chapter. I preach about fast-paced storytelling, but there is such thing as TOO fast.
While needing more chapters wouldn't be a problem for most authors, my ADHD brain is furious that Part 1 won't be a nice clean 10 chapters, especially when I consider the fact that Part 2 and Part 3 probably won't have that many chapters. I have this irrepressible desire to make each "part" nice and clean, consisting of similar or equal quantities of chapters each. It's a preposterous thing to be tilted about, especially in a story with only one character perspective at a time. If I can get over my own absurdity, things will get easier.
Full-Time Creativity
I got a new job! I'm now the Creative Lead for a YouTube channel focused on producing animations called Squared Media. I am their writer, musician, and quality assurance guy. They ALSO acquired my Minecraft server project I had been developing and want me to continue leading and developing it. This is a dream come true for me, as I make my own hours and I have LOTS of different things I get to cycle between... however, it has not made me any less busy! It has only meant that I can dedicate my full time to creativity oriented towards the company. It's a great feeling, because it's still very free-form, but it DOES mean I have less time to spend on my own personal writing.
"So... new chapter soon?"
I would love to say yes! The fact I'm here talking to you guys means I'm feeling the call, but we will see if I actually get anything done! If you all are still around, let me know. Hearing words of encouragement and interest go a long way for my motivation. I'm not looking to feed my ego, but knowing there's still an active interest in what I'm doing does help drive me, as I don't want to let people down. I know that sounds like a negative feeling, but it's actually been the opposite for me; I get a thrill from knowing I can deliver something people are anxious to consume. So please! Leave a comment, or contact me on Discord! It would really mean a lot to me, even if you don't have any advice to share.
Oh that okay.
Thanks for the update! I'll be here for the next chapter whenever you manage it.
It's really cool to have a larger group funding & helping your creative projects. Glad for ya!