This is a story about a sheep. A little sheep, locked deep in prison, put there by ponies. He doesn't want to be there, but then he's had to do a lot of things he doesn't want to. It's a shame he deserves to be in there.
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I am so glad to see this getting more attention, you put so much effort into your story, and I hope I can make something even a quarter as good in the future.
Keep up the excellent work!
It is here, another chapter of the sacred book has been completed
Well now isn't this interesting
Minor spelling error;
he's killed ponies*
Carton Juice not only fills the role of "girl friend", she overflows it.
I wonder what Lemon's attitude means. I think it means that she's noticed Prey's fondness for Crimson and is displeased either because she's inherited Prey's (prior) disdain for friendship or because she's jealous in some way. I think it's the latter given how prone to emotion and desirous (however subtle) of praise she's become. I might have said this before, but I suspect that Lemon is not as dead as Prey thinks she is, and since she knows him more intimately than anyone else due to their mind shenanigans, perhaps she's jealous that she isn't viewed in the same light as Crimson even after all she's done for him. I wonder what his reaction would be if that turns out to be the case...
Oh boy, looks like the situation with the changelings is gonna be heating up in the near future. I'm on the edge of my seat and the Hunt hasn't even begun yet!
I look forward to the next installment with eager anticipation!
Omg please tell me that the ISND are being sent after Prey's made up thief, that would be absolutely rich
Also, CONGRATS ON GETTING 400 LIKES!
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I can definitely see this being a thing. Even more so, I want it to be a thing.
I still think the way the changeling act are quite peculiar, but I do have a theory, or really just some speculation about the nature of changelings in this fic.
By far the most peculiar thing in my opinion about the way the changelings acted was the fact Shimmers led them to his hiding place in the ravine. Why would he do that? Everything about his actions seems counter intuitive to his goals as a changeling.
So I propose, what if changelings are also somewhat soft, not in the way ponies are, but moreso like thestrals are, as in, accepting of the need for violance and that the world is cruel, but still not so much accepting of death to dismiss it easily.
Maybe Simmers simply had a hard time of leaving the ISND to die. We know after all that changeling incase their victims in cacoons to feed, so it's not that much of a stretch to say that they might avoid killing ponies at all.
Also in the topic of changelings, I really look forward for more on Happenstance, he is certainly a mystery, all possibilities seem equally plausible.
Nothing like the sweet stench of privilege. Although to be honest, most of those restrictions will probably be meaningless to Prey, but there will still be those one or two that will.
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I agree. Both distain and envy seem plausible.
Both options are very worrying.
I personally found this section to be a bit confusing to read. had to reread it a couple of times, but maybe it was just my dyslexic ass playing tricks on me..
I doubt Nighthawk will give up on trying to learn what happened that day.
Well another masterpiece of a chapter. This is shaping up to be my favourite ark yet. Always loved seeing main cast dealing with the painful aftermath of a huge climax, especially if they failed.
I personally love when stories put down time in between each high moment. It always feels somewhat meaningless if you just jump to the next part without seeing how the consequence effect everybody and how everyone is on their spair time, when there is no monster to beat. Just some slice of life goodness, both happy and sad. It just gives everything more meaning.
Till next time. I'll be looking foreward to seeing Lilly again, even if Prey isn't. Seems majority vote won, for now at least.
... After this chapter and the last one, I kinda wanna know more about Scenic now. But he's throwing up a lot of flags rights now, so I'm not sure if he's going to last much longer.
And is Lemon developing her own personality? It would make sense; after so long and each with their own experiences they'd have been accruing more and more subtle differences, so it isn't outside the realm of possibility for her to acquire quirks that are distinctly hers, and she might not want Prey to snuff them out.
Lastly, that law is horseshit. And Night's reaction to someone in Prey's position not liking it? Equally so. Because enforcing it in the way he seems to want to is a half-measure: Prey has demonstrated a willingness to kill in his report, and I imagine that would cast some doubt on his previous case of pony-slaughter. Y'know, the one that got them out of the city in the first place? Moreover, he's also demonstrated that his knowledge of flora and fauna covers a whole lot more than most people think possible: what are the chances that he was taught only one way - one very specific and incredibly dangerous way - of setting up traps as a child? No, they have to assume that if he thinks the only way to save himself is to kill people, he will. And if that becomes the case they probably wouldn't know what to look for.
If Night was going to enforce the law sensibly, then he should have Prey thrown back in a prison cell or put him on leave indefinitely. Not doing so, especially when even an idiot can tell at this point that the only reward Prey's going to get for remaining with the ISND is pain and scorn, is asking a lot from a good will that Prey has never really displayed. Not doing so is just going to agitate those who feel that Prey should be under tighter restrictions and further alienate Prey, making more problems than just taking a side would have. Sometimes the middleground is the worst place of all.
Of course, he could choose not to enforce the law, but that would require him to be willing to say to either of the princesses "you're wrong", which seems to be anathema.
Hmm, I still think the meld wood will have odd effects on her Magic
He's
single quotes instead of double
almost as bad
by
scarcely
Conveniently prey has a proxy to act in his stead.... for now?
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Ponies are masters of the middle ground, never will you see a pony who is not simultaneously racist yet empathetic to the results of their own discrimination.
Didn't you hear about how All of Celestia's pupils, individuals with enough power to wipe out half a town with a magic blast that's not even a fifth of their mana pool, are exempt from the law? That, unicorns, creatures with the capability for Instant Death spells, aren't on said list?
That list isn't a law of suspicion for bearing arms, it's a law for specified discrimination and liability listing.
Welcome to Equestria, where you are expected to never question two things, Ponies and their immortal leader.
Made a whole new bookshelf named just prey cause my favorites shelf just wasn't good enough, insane how captivating this is!
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Thanks again, (as always), for pointing those out. 👍
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well, we're going to find out aren't we?
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Ah, thank you. I have fixed that mistake now.
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Oh, yeah, I guess this story did. Huh. 🤔 Never really noticed. But that's great still too of course!
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+Changelings: Yes, nothing is ever black and white. There is rarely any 'pure evil' and 'pure good'. People are individuals, with individual motivation. And it looks like, (not confirming but just pointing out), Shimmer was an infiltrator as opposed to a mere drone. It would make sense for an infiltrator to be smarter, and therefore have their own personality.
But as to a concrete reason why Shimmer helped... We may never know. 😇
+Princess Celestia's students exemptions: It makes sense. Story-wise, I mean.
I mean, Twilight mind controlled an entire village, and she got away with it. She essentially did the exact same thing as Starlight did, and yet she wasn't a villain for it somehow.
+The confusing bit: Yeah, I went and re-read that bit. I did use the wrong tense in a place, so I rewrote it a little to hopefully make sense to more people in the future, sorry. 😊
Thanks for the chapter! Great read!
I think you could introduce a psychiatrist as part of those restrictions. Like a once a week, pray goes and has to talk with somepony about his problems. The best part is that she uses magic to swear confidentiality so it's a good place for pray to rant about things/people who any him.
Restrictions should also be racist/classist in that maybe districts of the city are off limits unless he is on guard duty.
Restriction records can't be super private or else they wouldn't be very useful to the guard. It could be cool to have there be a group of people in canterlot who are like a club which you have to be in the restricted list to be invited. Normally, this isn't a big deal for the group to get a new member, but with the addition of crimson and pray they reach out in a very direct way to invite the two of them. Naturally, the group is is full of leaks that report to the guard and acts as a networking portal to catch or become involved in threats as they get planned instead of after the act.
Might also be interesting to have a magical element to the restrictions that pray can work around by having it report false locations instead of his real location. Sometimes the giving someone false info they trust is more valuable then the enemy having no information as it can be a useful point of manipulation.
Would be neet if the restricted list was enforced by a small offset of the sun guard. Just opportunity for more characters for pray to slowly drive insane.
Yeah, looking forward to see how Lily reacts to all this. ❤
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Nighthawk and the restriction law: So, Nighthawk doesn't approve of it. However it's the law, but he still doesn't think Prey deserves it when everyone he's killed, (that they know of), has been in self defence. Garrow was trying to kill Prey. The kindersnatches were trying to kill everyone, and also Prey built the bone rot mines on Gloom's sort-of-indirect/direct orders anyway.
TL:DR - Ponies don't like Prey for killing in self defence. Nighthawk is in the awkward situation where it's his job to disapprove too, but he doesn't think Prey was necessarily wrong. However, the law says otherwise. (Do you think I made that clear enough in the story or was it vague and didn't come across that way? 🤔)
But yes, there are red flags about Prey being raised, and there is a lot of uncertainty flying around. What will happen and where will this end up? Only time, (and me writing 😅), will tell.
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Thank you, I'm glad you think of it that highly. I like your crazy serial-killer icon by the way.
Lemon is a liability, notice it damnit, just put her out of the equation before she's a threat.
and now lily will be an annoyance and will probably try to kill Prey, he's still isn't out of the hospital he's in deep trouble, poor little guy
As usual it's a good chapter, and the website didn't die, things are improving, good job.
Really love Nighthawks approach to this, its sensible and in a way Prey can appreciate.
Cant wait to see what happens with Lilly
hH's—>he’s
gownupness—>grownupness
yo—>to
Hmm... a few more excellent chapters like this and I’ll need to move this to my favorites instead of Reading
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Well, if Nighthawk doesn't like the law and feels its unjust, then that actually makes him a bad officer of the law for enforcing it. Almost as bad as the people making exceptions that make the law blatantly speciest: he is actively making life worse for others for literally no reason other than "it's my job". If he's willing to cast aside his morals and sense of fairness for that, then he's just a bad cop and should not be making decisions that impact others. He's little better than hired muscle at that point.
Fantastic chapter as always though, can't wait to see what else happens. Ooh, there's also that bit where the Changelings cleaned up Baked's mess, I can't imagine that'll go over well if anyone decides to investigate the matter. Looks mighty fishy.
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I like how Scenic admits he won't kill if it comes down to a life or death situation and is, for some inane reason, proud of that.
Like, that is essentially admitting you're going to die if push comes to shove.
The again, he's a pony, not like he can comprehend the very idea of death any mroe than a rock can.
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That's the way it's often is in the real world. You can't just ignore laws and do as you see fit. If he chooses to go against the orders of the higher ups and against the laws there will be repercussions for ignoring the law, and the law would end up being inforced one way or another whether he likes it or not.
He doesn't have the authority to change the law nor, if what the report implied in the previous chapter is true, neither does he have the authority to send Prey back to prison instead.
It seems that he has very little choice in the matter.
Many times in the real world officers and military personnel have to do things that are against their morals, but doing so doesn't necessarily makes them a bad person, or a bad officer.
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I mean, I could amend the statement from "bad cop" to "bad person" if you only want law enforcement to obey rules without exception. Because that means that he doesn't disapprove the law so much as he disapproves having to enforce it on someone he knows/finds useful.
Circumstances should change how laws are enforced, or even if they are in the first place. Normally, its not allowed to cook food for the general public to eat unless you have a permit. Everyone should be able to see how that's for the general good. But if, say, a flash flood displaces hundreds of people from an area and they don't have food, only a complete jackhole is going to try and arrest someone whose independently trying to feed them. Fundamentally, we do want law enforcement to be arbitrary: we want them to know the difference between a starving thief and a rich embezzler, a serial killer or someone defending themselves, and be as soft or as rigid as necessary. Its the "as necessary" part that consistently lands them in trouble.
There will be restrictions placed upon Prey,...
Please still let him have accès to the library, the world can't be that cruel
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The circumstances are a lot more complicated then they appear. It's not as simple as overlooking a one-time violation, if he doesn't inforce Prey's restrictions it's not the same as not punishing one offence, but continuance of ignoring the law. He can't just say no either, orders are orders, if he doesn't conform to order he will be fired and replaced with someone who will, there is no place for insubordination. Even he has orders from higher ups.
In this case it's more appropriate to label special circumstances ain case to case bases. In other words, instead of exempting him from the restrictions entirely, to unrestrict him in exeptional situations. You gave the flash flood example, so think of it like that, in the case of a flash flood, certain laws will not be enforced due to those special circumstances like the need for certification to distribute food, but if a city is just prone to flash flood doesn't mean it's automatically exempt from those laws all the time, even if the flash flood didn't occur.
And as for the moral problem of putting those restrictions. Whatever moral reason Nighthawk has to not want to enforce the restrictions doesn't matter. The law has to be enforced. A drug dealer is still charged even if it was his only escape from crippling depth. A thief is still charged even if it was his only way to feed his children. Homeless people will still be kicked out of parks, even if they have nowhere else to live.
Law is really messy and justice is often disregard for the need to keep order. Most criminals have legitimate reason for comiting the crime, and often cops don't even want to arrest them. But the law is the law, and just following it is usually easier then to try and oppose it.
In Nighthawk case, that law would be enforced regardless, so he might as well be the one to enforce it to ensure things don't go too far. That's the way most 0eople in his position see it, if he refuses someone else will do it in his stead, so it might as well be the one he trusts the most, himself.
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he needs her for the moment he got no other agents to do his work but yes he should replace her as soon as he can she showing signs of defiance that makes her a potential threat
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I wouldn't say that she's a liability or a threat. The issue is that she's an individual, an idea Prey had previously discarded because he thought he'd shredded her mind. She's not disloyal, and has shown no indications of even thinking about betrayal, but her individuality is becoming more apparent due to her exhaustion and the two near-death situations he's been in (in which she was unable to help or only arrived when it was almost too late). There's also the matter of the failsafe rune on her neck keeping her in line, but I think that it might be unnecessary.
Another great chapter.
But wow, ponies are terrible. At this point, Celestia and Luna not being the epitome of evil will be an anticlimax. And that 'Threat List' is a fucking joke. They put children on it, but Twilight has full exemptions? Imma need some catharsis in this story soon cause coming back to read new chapters feels like being kicked in the side. (But in a good way)
Love it! The story just keeps getting better! Awesome work!
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Not saying the BBG of Luna and Celestia will happen, but there is that quote, (don't know where exactly from, but anyways):
"Most people are good and occasionally do something they know is bad.
Some are born bad and struggle every day to be good.
Others are bad and don't give a damn so long as they aren't caught.
But evil is completely different: Evil is bad which believes it is good."
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Good intentions, path to hell, I get'cha. Being immortal would be quite the burden on sanity I imagine. Not to mention it could just be Solar flunkies adhering to insane Imperium of Ponies mentality. Still, I imagine the "big reveal" being a loss for Prey either way. Celestia is Sun Wolf, Prey gets to feel vindicated in his beliefs, still up creek without boat or paddle, in piranha infested waters. Celestia ain't evil incarnate, Prey's life is still ruined beyond repair, and Celestia can't allow the political or social upheaval that his history would ignite. The ponies are fragile, she can't just have Nietzsche swing in on a wrecking ball and shatter their ivory tower of morality. Wouldn't matter to Prey anyway, since he's all sorts of messed up.
At least, you'd think that, if not for how it appears THAT THOSE GODDAMNED GOLDEN BANDS ARE MAKING HIM A GUD BOI which if true, the entirety of Canterlot should implode from the sheer hypocrisy and irony.
Ohhhh, it feels nice to have waited 4 months for new chapters to come out, but do I want to break my streak and read them all? Or do I wait? The more I think about the story the more I want to know what happens and how far it's gotten.
M-Mr. Stark. I-I can't. The character development. It-it's, it's too good. I don't feel so good. Bleh. Fades to dust.
Great chapter. Sometimes I feel like someones got a gun to your head, making you write this frequently.
But I just realized something. With Prey announcing that his fathered died, this makes it plausible that he can use Lemon as a guardian of sorts (step mother). Did you intentionally do that?
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Looking at Thorax & Pharynx, changelings can vary widely in this
I saw this story a few days ago on the Changeling of the Guard discord server as part of the recommendations list, and at first I was worried about the length of the story. After only a few days, however, I find myself on the edge of my seat, waiting for more. This is simply one of the best stories that I have read in a long time, and I am very excited and anxious to see how it goes on. I really can't get over how much I enjoy this story, and wish that I had found it sooner. I'll certainly be keeping a close eye on it in the future!
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It's not quite a gun, I just do a bit of writing each day (try, like, 500 words, it's not too hard), and then when I feel the chapter is done, I go through and edit it. Editing feels like it takes as long as the actual writing, and is a lot less fun, and I still need Sweetolebob18 to check it for me.
Happy anniversary!
It's mind boggling to think it's really been 2 years since the story begun. It definitely been a journey, one I wish to continue.
With every chapter the story only got better and better, it's honestly kind of terrifying to think you managed too keep improving the quality of the story (Which was already absurdly high to begin with) all while keeping such a consistent and frequent upload schedule. The amount of skill you have is astonishing and inspiring.
Don't be afraid to take a break if you need to, and don't push yourself too hard, we can take a little delay. You definitely deserve it.
So happy anniversary, good luck in your endeavours (especially in these trying times) and may the odds be forever in your favour.
I shall patiently wait for the next chapter.
Till next time.
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I just imagine him like Gordon Ramsay behind the scenes.
"It's all wrong you ignorant donkey! Do it all over again and fuck off!"
Of course no disrespect at all.
To start, I love this story, Prey has been a truly interesting character, chapter cliff-hanger be damned...
But I keep getting questions with no real answers, this read has been a 10/10 on my personal scale, I love the gritty darkness this brings. I'd love for it to even bring more of the unknown horror aspect like the Wolfing Woods portion, which was really good. But to stop digressing, I have to bring forth my few questions, should things ever get to these points!
Will Prey meet any of the Mane Six? (Probably an overused question, but a curious one nonetheless.) Especially all the interactions that could be had if anything were to come to light with our Purple Pony.
Will he meet Discord? This one comes before the inevitable third, but I digress, this would truly be a very momentous meeting, whether the chaotic point he is released, and the ensuing mental clash, or a meeting with the reformed Spirit of Chaos, and the chess games that could go on. (I'd also worry about him pulling the Jaws of Heart out like its some toy, and giving the Poor Lamb a near, if not sure-fire heart-attack.)
Lastly, knowing that the Mimics (Changelings), are onto Prey, or at least, not specifically fully onto him just yet, and how far I feel this is being set up... Do you intend for our dashing 'hero' to meet the Queen? I'm so curious to what the interaction would be, and how far, if any, that Prey might've changed during that time. Especially if thinking on the Mental Magics, versus the Hivemind, should it get to that point? (Which now also brings me curiously to wondering; Is Prey going to be immune to the Changeling Charm? I know he'll sense them, but that's still a coin-toss, considering People, especially Crimson.)
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Hello there, thank you for saying all those nice things. 😄 To provide some answers (not all of them, that's secret for the future):
1) Meeting mane 6: In the future, he'll probably meet one or two, by dint of Luna being the literal 1/2 ruler of Equestria, Prey working for Luna, and the Mane 6 being in everything important for some reason. 🙃 Not gonna' say when or who though.
2) Discord: I haven't actually decided yet how the whole "Discord's release and chaos land" is going to go down yet.
3) Well, you're right that I do have a plan with the set up, but I won't say too much about it because spoilers. But as point, the changelings, I feel, had definitely been infiltrating Canterlot long before the wedding and invasion took place.
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Thank you for such an interesting story! Its been a constant since I'd begun reading it many months ago. Prey has been interesting, and he really makes for a deep and well-written character. I also have to give props in towards both Gloom and Crimson, since Prey really helps lift their growth as well, especially for all the backstory to yet be given!
Again, a bit of digressing, but thank you for some answers, even under all the appearing questions, I can't wait to see the next chapter, and how things go between Prey and Lily. I have to wonder how she's going to react, at the same time, I also have to wonder about the Warlocks Sun Wolf comment, considering Prey's background, might need to read-back, in case I missed anything.
Anywho, I will always be watching for more, and I might ask a question or two in the future when things get even juicier! I hope to see this get horrifying, more mysterious, and bring me more questions than answers! (Your almost like the SCP Foundation with the how and why blurring up so much.)
Lilly! So excited for the next chapter to see her!
DAMMNNN ITITTT.... I was able to wait four months without reading, only when I did start reading again to have it leave on a cliffhanger
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Oh, ah, sorry then. Most chapters I seem to do that on looking back actually. 😅