So I submitted this when I first published it.
I'm glad that they did this for me I will take their suggestions under consideration and re-write a few things. but they could have done all the chapters. I mean that is why I submitted this to them. It just seems lazy especially since my writing style got a lot better as this story went on. I am very grateful for this though I can use this to make it even better.

This story has been reviewed by the Equestrian Critics Society.

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Watching Right now!

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Some times my wife....My wife always say the funniest and strangest things.

Me(in the van with her driving): Are you sure you know where you're going?
Her: Do you want to die? Cause I can kill us?

Her: I'm hungry.
Me: I'll make us some cereal.
Her: How about eggs?
Me: I'm not doing eggs.
Her: Why? I do you.

Me(coming home for the day and seeing dinner isnt ready.) Why aren't you in the kitchen?
Her: Because I have a bigger dick than you.

Me: I'm going to put on socks.

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It is midnight.
My Daughter is teething and wont sleep and the only thing keeping her calm is watching me write. That is only if I read what I'm typing. I guess its like reading her a book, but I did that and....it didn't work.

I want to take this moment to let you in on writing technique.

write one to throw away.
You're going to have stale or bad ideas; its unavoidable. So what you do is write a piece of shit on purpose or over write and trim the fat.

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From my wife across the pond, dont ask.

its one of her first so in that prospect its pretty good

So as I'm finally adding to The Chaotic Relationship of Eris and Dusk Shine I realized that my wife never calls me anything but by my name.

I call her gorgeous or sweetie. She ....doesn't do anything like that.
so...on the ride home in our van(Yes we have a van...I have a soccer team...I'm the coach....oh god, I just realized I'm a soccer dad...)
Anywho I asked her: "Hey gorgeous, why don't you ever call me names?"

........................

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For so long I have had a mental block combined with the tasking of planning out and entire story for The Chaotic Relationship of Eris and Dusk Shine. But then I realized something. When I wrote the Dusk and Eris short story I was just having fun and putting things in there that I wanted. I been hammering away at what I been hoping would be another great hit like Twilight at the Disco, but it doesn’t have to be. So I have decided to do the same thing I did with chapter 1 of this story. Just

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From Kiki
I like this one a lot, the expression on Twilights face is great.

I know it doesn't fit in any scenes but Kiki tells me it was inspired by Twilight at the Disco

Kitty

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