Heart Warmed

by Magenta

Chapter 1

I find a tad ironical speaking about sad things now that Hearth's Warming Eve was coming up.

Mother always said to me that whenever I had inner rage and heartache to trot as hard as I could in order to think straight.

I was falling to pieces because of nostalgia.

Winter was never my favorite of seasons not to mention always getting sick. I was also having a great share of nightmares which involved a certain mare who felt oddly familiar.

Now you might think that I'm the kind the pony who can tackle anything spooky but in reality I am very vulnerable.

In this dream I was walking across a dark forest and noticed it was surrounded by an uncomfortable crimson fog. It was so thick, not to mention that it made my body feel heavy as a rock.

"I must find shelter," I repeated to myself as I tried to get ahead.

Finally I found a rusty old cabin which seemed sort of drafty so I had no choice but to curl up until the worst was over.

"Bree, Bree, where are you?" said a voice so softly.

It felt more eerie than welcoming.

Again it said, "I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU."

I kept trembling and begged not be shredded to bits, "Please don't hurt me, don't hurt me."

"I said I've looking everywhere for you...why, don't you recognize me, Bree?"

It took me awhile to remember who it was and that was none other than the Princess of the Night herself, Luna.

She looked more beautiful than ever; her long star studded mane, her round aquamarine eyes that would make anypony feel completely mesmerized.

I also noticed she carried a black velvet saddlebag out of which she pulled out a tiny pouch.

"Will you join me for tea, I was looking forward to share it with some special pony."

"So you thought of me?" I replied, "that's incredible."

"You have grown into quite a handsome colt, dear Bree yet sometimes I wonder about you."

I was flattered with this last comment then she puzzled me.

Using her magical horn she laid out a round table for us to gather.

Next she brought out a teapot with a mystical vapor coming from it which seemed to fill the room.

"That's amusing," I said, "I don't recall you had this talent."

She smiled timidly. "WELL, a princess has to be trained in all sorts of silly tasks but I figured out it was time to put them into practice having seen what you've experienced so far."

"OH, so you know what has been disturbing my sleep?"

" But of course! Aren't I the mare who walks through dreams?"

"Yes, indeed."

"Well then, have a try of this tea and then you will see what haunts you!"

I slowly drank this reddish brew and to my surprise it was the most wonderful thing I ever tasted. Its aroma was inviting and sweet but not too much to be annoying.

"This stuff is amazing, how do you call it?"

"It's known as Ruby Red Tea, not only does it help to sleep but it reveals the source of your nightmares. BEHOLD!"

The mist turned into the figure of a tall slender unicorn who ran gracefully across the wind. She kept laughing however.

"I know who it is..." I said as I lowered my head, "but I rather not talk about it."

"Oh, come on, a gentlecolt like you shouldn't have secrets like those especially when they cause you a heartache."

I sighed deeply as I gazed out the window to seek some courage.

"It's Fallabella. She was my first love interest before I had left town to pursue my career. She was never very considerate but deep down inside I hoped she would pay attention to me."

"So, you had high hopes for this mysterious mare, did you not?" said Luna.

"I never really knew what I wanted from her, maybe just being accepted. It was a tough year, the very last one I would spend in Fillydelphia. The fact is I never said goodbye now, did I?"

Luna nodded and remained silent.

"Maybe that's it! The only way I could face my fears is to talk to her directly...the problem is I don't know how to make that happen."

"Patience, Bree, you shall see her again, just hold that thought and when you least expect it this haunting mare will come back to your life."

"What if it never happens?"

"Then it's because you wished for it not to happen in the first place. Oh Dear, look at the time, I must be going now, Happy Holidays and take care!"

She disappeared into the darkness and soon the image of the old cabin dissolved as well.

It had been the most detailed of all dreams I have ever had. Strangely, I woke up refreshed as if that elixir was real and had made effect.

The following was going to be rather long since it was for practice. Lilicat tackled in her usual playful way and as soon as I was able to get her off my back another familiar face showed up.

"Well, hey there pony princess, rise and shine!"

That was Pete, the falcon gryphon in his usual way. I just loved his snappy sense of humor.

"When are you going to stop calling me "princess" I'm not a mare you know..."

Suddenly he changed his tone, "Who ever said you're a mare, it's what they call uh...a 'figger' of speech?"

"Figure of speech. Anyway..."

"You'd be surprised to know what a lil' bird told me."

"Not interested," I said as I managed to throw on a black striped hoodie.

It wasn't until Pete asked concerned, "Do you um, need some help with that?"

"NO," I said energetically. "The fact that I'm an earth pony doesn't necessarily mean I have limitations."

"There you go," said Pete as he finished dressing me.

"Fine, what's the news?"

"Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're playing in Fillydelphia this weekend."

I wanted to laugh thinking it was some sort of sick irony.

"You mean...to tell me, I have a show this weekend?"

"Mmmhmmm," said Pete with his arms crossed.

"In Fillydelphia?"

"Mmmmhmmm."

"That's interesting..." I said as I began to circle my room. "It so happens that somehow I'm supposed to be there."

"Buck yeah you're gonna be there, there's a contract and everything!"

"No, no, no, I mean fate, it has to do with fate. I need to do something else than just play."

Pete looked from side to side uninterested, "Well, I just came to tell you the news unless you wanted to add something else..."

"It's about a certain pony..."

Pete smiled and teased me, "Ewwwww, now I get it, some sweetheart you left back home?"

I slightly blushed and got upset, "Yes...she is."

"Ohhh, them you should be mighty glad that's happening, you know since you always seem to have a special somepony for almost every day of the week."

"No, I don't!" I said as I came climbing down the stairs. "It's not my fault I'm so desirable but honestly do you think I should settle down?"

Pete nodded , "Mmmmhmmmm."

"I'm not sure about that."

"Let me tell you something my granddaddy gryphon used to say, "you never know what's gonna happen if you don't try."

"But what if she's not there at all, what if she moved out just like me?"

"At least you'll know and let her go."

"You sound so deep this morning, my feathered friend."

"Hey, that's what I'm here for!"

Later that afternoon when I was able to gather my band I felt more insecure than ever, the shadow of doubt haunted me, my thoughts were unclear and I couldn't fully concentrate.

"So chill out, dude!" said Twigster as he hugged me slightly. "The point is that we're all together. You should check out what Jayson has made for us."

"He did, what did he do again?" I said.

Jayson was my most valuable asset in the band because he was the only gifted unicorn who was capable of handling several instruments at the time but at the moment he was just the drummer.

He was the tallest one of the bunch and the one who actually looked like a colt, with a light brown coat and a messy mane that he could hardly look where he was going.

For some unusual reason he always worshipped the ground I stepped on and told me he loved me, in a playful way.

"I just want you to know one thing, little dude..."

"Yes?" I said naively.

"I love you, dude!!!" he said energetically.

"ME? No, I 'luv' you..."

"Oh, no you don't , I LOVE YOU!" He later hugged me using all his might.

"No, seriously, I love you!" I said.

"You know, you could always say 'thank you'," said Twigster.

Finally, after I was set free and recovered my breath I dared to ask, "And what seems to be this new contraption of yours?"

"Oh yeah...my new and fully improved drum kit!"

I wasn't very impressed at first, "What's so different from the last one?"

"Will you just look at that triple bass? It's sure to make you sound eerier than ever!"

"Why would we want to sound eerier?" I said a little puzzled.

"'Cuz that's the thing nowadays, you see, nothing like custom made, I always say,"

said Jayson sounding rather proud.

Later Fred came into the room in an optimistic fashion. "So, I just heard the news we're heading to Fillydelphia this weekend? Is it some sort of coincidence or are you feeling a little bit homesick, huh, Marelyn?"

And I responded trying not to get so upset, "No, it just happened. I actually don't care what happens over there anymore, it's the most boring town ever."

"Gee, I'm surprised since you keep bringing it up every single time you can..."

"I have the right to change my mind, it's just another town and that's it, end of story."

"You are SO random, " said Fred while he grabbed and adjusted his nifty black guitar. "But I bet I can figure out why you're really going..."

"Fine but I'm not going to tell you, " I said as I adjusted my custom hoof made titanium mic stand with a stylized alicorn.

"Why?"

"Because I don't trust you."

He chuckled, "Soooo, let me see if I got this right, you don't trust your guitarist but you trust your cat blindly?"

I thought this was a huge joke but I contained myself, "At least I've known her way

before you came along..."

Then suddenly Twigster cried, "Hey guys! I got a better idea, can we just try to do some real work instead of speculating what's gonna happen this weekend?"

And he was right, he managed to bring down my anger but not my anxiety.

In a way I had chosen to literally run away from that town since there was nothing I would truly miss except for my mother...and those extra crispy pretzels she made this time of year.

Compared to Canterlot where everything seems to be controlled by the power of the unicorns winter was rather hostile.

I used to spend my afternoons inside my treehouse with Lilicat surrounded by boxes of crayons and paintings of all sorts and stayed there until it made some sense. I told you I was very creative.

Even when I wasn't able to leave the house because I got sick with the pony flu I loved just being there and pretend the world around me didn't exist.

I still am doing pretty much the same thing expect that I turn these images into songs, into something that matters.

"Oh, pony feathers, I suppose I can't escape my fate," I thought as I boarded our private train.

The night when we left this noble city and into the depths of this unwanted territory Twigster and I stayed up late as an excuse to cure my jitters.

We had this bunk beds while I stayed on top and stuck out my head.

"Hey, dude, " I said.

"Hey, dude, what's up? Oh yeah, you, get it?" he laughed stretching his hind legs.

"This is serious, I can't sleep."

"Um, does the fact of counting sheep still work?"

"No, I mean, I haven't been to Fillydelphia in ages. What if they don't recognize me anymore?"

Twigster slightly yawned and threw a big fluffy pillow over his head, "That sounds even better, I guess..."

"You're supposed to help me out here...and that's not working at all. I mean, it would feel so awful to act like absolutely nothing happened."

"Aaaand...since when do you care about things like that, it's not like it the first time you're playing."

"It's about..." I paused and took a deep breath, "Fallabella, I'm worried she might find me there and suddenly started talking to me."

"So? You said she was the most gorgeous filly you ever did see, maybe you'll get lucky this time and settle down, afte rall, it would be a nice present for Hearth's Warming Eve."

"I don't have any expectations about her right now! It's just an old high school crush. And if I don't meet her I'm afraid to have these nightmares again!"

"Well, little dude, you have expectations anyway so if they're gonna happen, they're gonna happen. Practice the art of sleep as I am doing as of right now, there's a beautiful Moon out there and..."

"Right, the Moon...I think I understand now."

I spread myself across the bed and rolled around feeling very uncomfortable and it wasn´t exactly because of the weather.

I whispered in the dark while concentrating on the ghostly image of that dreadful unicorn.

I shut my eyes firmly begging for her not to come back.

The wind whistled softly into the coach making it even easier to fall asleep. I relaxed and said,

Bella, why must it be this way?
aren't we friends or are we foes,
I counted sleepless nights
so I could have at bit of you.

The wind grew stronger and more threatening as we passed through Foal Mountain. I felt as if I was tied to the bed so I struggled to get up and shut the window.

"It's all over now, Bree, so give up..." said a voice.

I closed my eyes once and again and repeated uncontrollably and shaking, "It's only in my imagination, that's it, it's only my wild imagination."

"Is it really?" said the voice again.

"YES IT IS!" I shouted.

Twigster got a little bit startled and interrupted, "What is, dude?"

"Nothing, just forget it..." I went back to my bunk bed feeling very very upset and slightly embarrassed.

"You're extremely jumpy, I don't wanna say this but I have a bad feeling about this..."

"Don't say that, I can handle this myself, I'm a big colt now."

"Well you better," said Twigster mumbling, "Or they may have to put you in a straitjacket."

"Huh, huh."

It all remained calm after that eerie encounter.

The next day, however it was literally chaos. For a normal pony it would be something of a big circus performance where you have to juggle several acts at a time but for a well known artist like myself it was a piece of cake.

Everywhere I looked anxious fan girls waiting for my arrival, sorry OUR arrival at the train station. It was if it a huge welcoming after being absent for thousand of years, signs like "Fillydelphia misses you, MM," showed up. They would never have done that for me in the past, not even a pat on the shoulder.

The landscape was of an ancient town which had seen better days, very conservative full of old fashioned buildings and shopsbut the citizens were more down-to-earth and hard working than the easy going snobs I had to deal with in Canterlot.

It felt as if I had gone and come back as if nothing happened; nothing much had changed, perhaps a few new roads and buildings, all neatly decorated with paper snowflakes. The sun was up and unusually warm, it seemed that it would be the perfect night.

"Well, this place certainly look picturesque," said Twigster half awake half asleep. It was around 8 in the morning.

"It sure is!" I said, "I guess that nothing go wrong."

"Speak for yourself, this cold is freezing my hooves!" he said.

"Then you must be so sensitive because I'm feeling just fine."

My brown coated friend was a native of Las Pegasus where it was always sunny and it hardly ever rained so clearly he was away from his natural habitat, he was the one who was most bundled up.

Fred just mocked me and didn't stop to throw his world renowned sarcasm at me, "Nice hometown, M and um....what's so damn special about it, it's like walking into a ghost town waiting for the Headless Horse to show up."

"It's not that kind of place...unless you were expecting to fall into a carefully planned trap," I said.

"It wouldn't surprise me, Mr.. Bigg is so ever full of surprises, I wonder where he will send us next, the Everfree Forest?"

"Hey, sweet things!" cried Pete. "There's no time for catching up on old times, this day is packed with tons of activities!"

"YAY! Now that sounds more like it," said Jayson, "and my tummy's rather empty from all that rehearsing, so what's good around these parts, Marelyn?"

"For you? I'll see what I can do..."

Our temporary home for that weekend or should hotel was the legendary Miraculous Mare and yes it also famous for its incredibly stuffing meals. I could deal with that as long as Jayson was in top shape for what was coming.

"So do you think the Fillydelphians are a tough crowd?" he said as he attempted to disappear a layered clover sandwich.

"I couldn't be so sure...because I never played for them," I answered while I was sipping at some home made apple cider.

"And he says this is some sort of coincidence!" cried Twigster. "Fate or something..."

"It's not like it's written in stone, you guys. I'm just feeling more anxious and pressured than ever!" I said.

"Well so am I because I've never been here before and I'm not complaining, am I?" said Fred.

"I can't complain either," said Jayson, "At least the grub here is awesome."

"I'm SO glad you like it," I said. "I just want to get this over with so I can go home and celebrate another predictable Hearth's Warming Eve perhaps with one mare or two..."

"Yeah, by the way, you don't have any plans for that night? Cuz Fred and I are planning to attend this exclusive party at the Chateau Licorne," said Twigster proudly.

"Seriously, the ancient hotel where only the most important ponies get invited?" I said.

"Absolutely! You can't be alone on a night like that! Every pony who's any pony will be there, what do you say?" said the brown colt. "Come on..."

"That depends on how things turn out these days..."

"You´re such a kidder, you know you want to," said Fred.

"I promise you I won´t enjoy it in the least and I usually live up to my promises," I said. "Let´s get this show on the road..."

My expectations about the show weren´t so high...it went well although it could have been better. There where a bit of technical issues, it began a little bit late and apparently Fred was slightly off-key but it didn´t matter much.

We played in a small venue named the Fillydelphia Forum. It so happened to be that I went there for my first concert when I was younger and it now seemed another beautiful coincidence. I said to myself that I would play here someday and now that I had that golden chance of a lifetime it was so dull.

When you´re little everything looks so huge and now it didn´t look that hot at all.

Jayson´s triple bass was a huge highlight, it managed somehow to compensate things. Every other ponies faces went from "meh" to "awesome" in a matter of seconds. This would be the last gig that I´d had this year and in a few weeks there was a small tour coming up so there wasn´t going to be so much time to cool off.

I´m not very used to giving speeches between every song but I took the freedom of saying this in my usual nightmarish tone, "Thank you, Fillies, I love you all and forever will you be in my heart, ROCK ON!"

The crowd went insane and asked for more but I just didn´t want to extend it and make the moment more mellow.

As I went backstage and seeked to find some comfort in the darkness of my room Pete approached me and said in a low tone, "Sorry to bother you but some pony insists in seeing you."

"Unless it´s some hot mare I might reconsider it," I said as I was carefully removing my stage clothes.

"There´s not a single doubt about that! I wouldn´t miss this if I were you," said Pete poking me.

"Seriously? You?"

"Now don´t take things too literally just go there and I guarantee you anything will be alright."

"You sound a bit more suspicious than the usual but okay..."

I approached the hallway crestfallen when suddenly something snapped inside of me and remembered when I was considered a "strange flank", a pony with a cutiemark that was a complete enigma.

By the time we all got our cutiemarks they had their destiny all figured out except for me which was why I was pursued.

"Well, come on, Bree, tell us again, what's the meaning of your cutiemark?"

And I said, "Well no, I bet it's something truly special!"

"Well I don't think so...if you don't even know what it is then it must be

some sort of mistake, a strange flank, that's what it is!"

"No, it's not! It is going to be something amazing, I swear!"

Said and done, I truly became some amazing creature.

It was HER. She came back to me out of nowhere and recognized me. She even called me by my real name.

What was unusual though was when Fallabella came up to me I noticed she didn't marry or any of the sort, she just bumped just like me into bad relationships.

She looked as glamorous as usual, probably with her blonde mane slightly cropped, still she kept her distance.

"Well, well, well, look at you now, Bree..."

I interrupted her, "I'm sorry, I don't go by that name anymore, not even my closest friends call me that."

"Really, I still think it´s a cute name. You look good," she said as she played with the strands of her carefully combed mane.

"Is that it? You just came here to compliment me like all the other fans do?" I said a bit upset.

"Oh come on, can´t a girl compliment you freely without asking anything in return? Look, I know things were difficult back then but you have to let it go. Besides..."

"Besides, what?"

"I honestly think that our lives are so different now. I may not be as famous as you but I can handle things just fine and it would never have worked anyway."

"Do you think that...no, I think you´re totally confusing things because..."

"Bree, please, maybe I didn´t talk you too much in high school but I´m pretty sure you had feelings for me, don´t you remember that?"

That last comment was a sure stab through the heart so I decided to turn things around, "I said I don´t go by that name anymore. That pony you used to know might be buried somewhere along with the rest of my memories."

"That is so rude! Fine then, I´m sorry to have bothered you, it seems that you´re terribly busy coming up with ways to pretend that you´re the greatest pony when in fact you heart is as black as dragon´s lair."

And then she left with her head up high. She must have thought that I was so damn offended that it would ruin my day but no. On the other hoof I felt as if I turned into a villain instantly.

Under normal circusmtances that wouldn´t have mattered in the least but it felt worst than ever.

Twigster found me, "What was that all about? Who was she?"

I blatantly answered, "Her? No pony, she was just so obsessed with me and thought she would get lucky."

"That´s strange because it gave me the impression she knew you well."

"Exactly my point!" I cried. "I need to get out of here as soon as possible. There´s nothing else to do."

"But..." said Twigster.

"But nothing!"

As we left Fillydelphia the next morning the only thing I did was make small talk with the guys. I was absent all the time and only staring the window and deeply sighing. Not even the message that Mother sent me could help out. It said something like,

"You deserve to be happy even if you don´t think it´s right."

"Alright, dish it out," said Twigster. "I´m your best friend so there´s absolutely no way you can hide something from me. I saw what you did to that unicorn so was she, that famous Fallabella?"

I stuttered from me feeling a bit nervous, "Uh...uh, no! Remember how we said that it would be almost impossible that she would show up?"

"Nah, I have the sinking feeling it was her right, right?"

I sighed again even deeper, my eyes sort of watered, "I...I...It was horrible! She hates me, and it´s all my fault."

"Oh, come now, no need to get so emotional, can´t you just let her go?"

"That´s exactly what she said to me! But why is it so hard to do?"

"Hey, moving away from home is always crappy...the good thing you get to start over and make a new life just like you did, why would you want to wallow in nostalgia?"

"Right...it doesn´t matter anyway."

"Are we still bros?"

"Yeah...you know damn well we are," I said and we put our hooves together.

Hearth´s Warming Eve was just around the corner and believe me it didn´t feel right at all. Twigster said to me that it wasn´t such a good idea to get the blues so that´s how I ended up being dragged into the Chateau Licorne, one of the fanciest and most ancient places in all of Canterlot.

Every year they threw this big party that was done mostly for charity and it wasn´t that strange to find other pony celebrities. Mr. Fancypants and her trophy wife Fleur de Lis organized and it was almost a miracle to get in. Since Fred and her lovely sister and renowned designer Vivienne came from an illustrious family, the Sablebrushes they had open doors to almost anything.

I decided to go simple yet elegant in a fine black leather jacket and make up free. It was colder than in Fillydelphia but I really didn´t care.

The Chateau itself was a breathtaking place to be in, it was full of history and several legends.

I also noticed the fine works on the decorations and the beautiful marble fountain in the lobby which symbolized the settling of the unicorn ponies in Canterlot. Its waters were mysteriously enchanted to display a different color every five minutes. I casually saw my reflection in red and the sight of it disgusted me. My eyes glowing red reminded me that I also had a nasty dark side.

Suddenly I began to lose interest and leave the room without any pony noticing, not even Twigster and Fred. Did I become invisible to them, or where they having too much fun to wonder if I needed anything?
Do you know what it feels like when you want to scream to the top of your lungs but are unable to?

I slowly walked away to the balcony to see the starry sky and sighed deeply. I sang,

Dear Luna, what should I do now?

Dear Luna, what else can I say,

I´m giving up, the day is done.

Dear Luna, I wish could find away.

Don´t leave me now, don´t leave me now...

Some minutes later some cute mare approached me,

"You look like you could use some company," she said. She looked smaller than me, younger than me, brilliant rose coat, silky blonde mane, blue sapphire eyes, and a voice like a small angel that made me shiver.

"Sorry, my name is Evening Sky but you can call me Evie, and you are?"

I froze and realized she didn't recognize me for one instant so I proceeded to act as if I was a regular pony.

"I wanted to get away for a while," I continued.

"I know how it is," she smiled openly, "sometimes these parties can get so crowded."

"Yeah well, I came because I was invited by some friends," I said timidly. "I'm sorry, where are my manners, my name's Marelyn Manson."

She was slightly surprised and embarrassed, "No...wait! Really?"

"The one and only!"

"I don't believe this..."

"That's alright," I continued. "It's comforting to go unnoticed every now and then."

Why did I say that? I was contradicting myself, I did want some attention and she was the perfect excuse! The problem was that approaching a vulnerable colt was like going inside a dragon's lair uninvited.

"Are you sad," she asked, "or am I being too nosy?"

I was mesmerized that she could see right through me. Grandma warned me once about those ponies who had sharp intuition.

"No, no at all, like I said it's alright," I said as I rested my head on the balcony. "So what brings you here to this part of Canterlot?"

She answered proudly like a prized student, "My mom is an actress and I constantly work in Applewood day and night reading and rehearsing all these boring scripts. Say, that's a peculiar cutie mark you have, mind if I ask what does it mean?"

Hardly anypony asks me about that. Then somehow I felt a spark which brought a smile back into my face so I kindly explained.

"Duality," I began. "It appeared earlier than I expected so it took me awhile to get the hang of it."

"Oooooh," she stood still, "Tell me more..."

"Well being an earth pony with very little to offer sometimes what you can rely on is your imagination and then you can be anypony you want to be."

"Like acting?"

"Exactly." Now it all made sense. She was sent to me. It was tough to be different but it was better to know I wasn't the only one.

"Yes. You and I are in the same business more or less. Do you come here often?"

"Not really since I'm sort of busy but I'll do my best now that I know I can always find somepony as cool as you! I have to go."

She went away like a shooting star, and my wish was to make her mine.

That was the part of my life I labeled as SUCCESS.

Comments

[ninjanaut1000]

well that was very.......intersting.