Twilight, You Have Visitors: A (not very) Helpful Guide

by Brinstar77

Page 4

See that, Twily? You know, that thing that’s poking around the room while you spy on it from the little bolt-hole you found? That’s a Hunter. They’re like those humans Lyra keeps prattling on about every time you’re in earshot-

Wait. What was that?

Oh, you can hear me now? Good to know.

Anyway, where was I? Oh, right. These things are like the humans Lyra’s so obsessed with, but with scales and claws rather than skin and fingernails. Oh, and my earlier description of this place as an “Alien torture-plex?” These guys are that torture-plex’s guards. They’re lean, mean, sporting alien death rays, and will do everything in their power to drag you kicking and screaming off to a fate best not dwelled upon, or failing that, kill you.

That is, unless you take initiative, and kill them first.

What was that? You aren’t a killer? The very thought of being one just made you puke?

…pretty sure the thing heard you spilling your guts all over the floor, if the way it’s heading toward your hidey hole is any indication.

But before you do anything you’ll regret, take a moment to think about everything you’ve been through. Seriously. I mean, this creature is in service to a force that has sucked up the entirety of ponyville, is currently in the process of enslaving, vivisecting, killing and/or eating everyone you’ve ever known, tried to do the formermost two to you, and is directly responsible for you complete and utter inability to make any lists for these past few minutes. How does all that make you feel?

It makes you feel mad, right? Mad enough to kill, right?

…no? It doesn’t?

Well, it’s just found you, and it’s trying to kill you now. Remember the golden rule, Twily? Do unto others as they do unto you? Right now, this particular ‘other’ is trying to murder you.

So go ahead.

Do unto him what he’s doing unto you, and murder that reptilian son of a bitch first. Murder him in cold, black, alien blood.

Author's Note:

Remember what I said about putting my own spin on the narration style? Yeah, Twilight's actually talking back to the narrator here; that's the spin I was talking about. Needless to say, this 'guide' has an ulterior motive at heart... though it's a motive that entails actually caring about Twilight and what happens to here, at least for now.