It was a rainy afternoon when the cavalcade pulled to a stop in the platform. On the train was our familiar group of heroes, who looked pretty tired and battered from the incredibly long journey.
"I could do with a shower," Sunny said. "I'm not usually one to fuss over personal appearance, but I suspect I do smell a bit."
"You don't smell at all!" Salty said.
"Thanks Salty."
"Forget a shower!" Pipp said. "I could do with a manicure."
"Is that really your first priority?" Zipp asked, looking a bit surprised. "We've gone a long way from home and that's what you want?"
"Long distance running is no reason to not look fabulous," Pipp retorted over the radio, and then blew raspberries.
Zipp rolled her eyes. "Gee, how childish."
Izzy, however, seemed pretty cheerful. "Hey!" she said. "We're in Heywood! We're not far from home now!"
"Where is your home?" Argyle asked.
"In that housing estate over there," Izzy smiled. "It's great being back in this place!"
"Where precisely are we?" Charles asked. "This is all very northern."
"Heywood," Izzy explained, "is a town in Greater Manchester. It's not far from Bury either, so we're good to go for major settlement visits."
"Weren't Blur from here?" Sophie asked.
"They're from London," Pipp said. "You're thinking of Oasis." They were now stood on the platform, and the others looked at her. "What? Britpop is the best! Don't Look Back in Anger is basically the anthem of Manchester!"
Sophie then spoke up. "I hate to interrupt, but I appear to have a leaky tank. Somebody wouldn't mind patching it up?"
"I imagine we can do so," Sunny said.
"Still," Charles said, "could be worse."
If Hitch had any clue how unreliable Rebecca was going to be he would hired a taxi and left the engine to be towed through Manchester. The engine was sat on the top of a set of points that controlled access between several different important lines in the region. And this was a bit of a problem, as several trains sat there in position on both sides of the junction. The drivers were blasting the horns and generally looking rather cross.
"Oh," Rebecca said. "This is a bit awkward." She tried to address Hitch. "I am sorry about this. I did say I was in need of an overhaul, but I had thought I could make it through this section of town."
"Maybe we should have had one of the diesels tow you," Hitch sighed, before picking up his phone. He punched some numbers into it and then waited for the line to connect.
"Network Rail signalling centre, Victoria Box, how can we help you over?"
"I'd like to report a stalled engine on the..." Hitch looked for, and found, a sign proclaiming where he was. "The Ordsall Chord, namely my own. I'd like a tow."
"Sure thing. Thunderbird being dispatched from Longsight Depot now. Please hold tight."
"Not much else I can do," Hitch thought to himself as the noise amplified around him, some of it with language too profane to repeat here.
It was early evening by the time the diesel dropped Rebecca off at Heywood station, and the team were ready to pick Hitch up. The others were waiting in a siding, and the humans had gone to Izzy's house. Luckily, they all walked there together and went inside the building, a fairly unnasuming surburban home incredibly similar to any found in most houses within the United Kingdom.
"Welcome to La Casa Izzy," Izzy said, as they went into the front room. It was surprisingly comfortable inside, with armchairs and several pillows, as well as a table.
"Nice place," Argyle said, nodding in approval. "What do your parents do?"
"Regional business," Izzy replied. "They're up in Scotland, helping to finance an oil rig." She looked around. "Tea?"
The others nodded, and so Izzy vanished into the kitchen for a bit. This left the others to engage in discussion amongst themselves before she returned, a tray in her hands. Upon this tray was a teapot, six tea cups, and a saucer of milk.
Once the tea was served, the conversation turned to their next move. "Right," Argyle said. "We need to figure out how to acquire the next fragment, legally this time." He pointedly looked at Sunny and Zipp, who nodded in response, having gotten the message.
"I think I know what you are looking for," Izzy said, taking a sip. "There's something similar to your drawings in the collections of the East Lancashire Railway's engine department. Part of a trophy."
"YIKES!" Pipp yelled. Everybody glanced over.
"Are you alright?" Hitch asked.
"I chipped my nail," Pipp said.
Izzy's face dropped. "Oh no!" she said. Then her face returned to normal. "Anyway..." she took another sip of tea. "The guy who runs the place is a chap called Alphabittle Blossomforth, who's about the most Lancastrian Lancastrian who ever Lancastered. He's got some older views about some things, but he's a pretty decent guy."
"Traditional views," Pipp said. "How about we disguise ourselves as boys to avoid detection!"
"I'm already a boy," Hitch pointed out.
"That plan's a bit problematic," Zipp said. "I've got another idea. How about one of us go."
"Nope!" Sunny said. "We're a team."
"Then," Hitch suggested, "why don't we appear as engineers? That way we more easily create the impression that we know what we're doing. And if we really want to blend in, we can get the help of a local."
"Who?" Pipp asked.
"Izzy!" Hitch smiled. "She's from here, so she can teach us to speak like the locals. Isn't the local accent really nasally, and full of dropped consonants?"
"You mean you want t' learn how t' talk like you're oop north?" Izzy said. "Least you din't get stuck in t' bath!"
"That was really good!" Sunny said. "Please teach us some more!"
"I've had practice," Izzy smiled. "Now pay close attention. This is how a Northerner walks..."
11424727
Sorry
11424727
Have you got the chance yet?
Maybe not smell, Sunny. But a shower wouldn't be a bad idea, just wash off any accumulated sweat.
If you don't like the way your nails are, then why don't you just wear fancy gloves?!
Well Hitch, that's why you don't take a random without knowing about it first. But given he hasn't driven one, I'll let it slide.
What do average houses look like in The UK anyway?
Oh, Pipp...
Pipp, I highly doubt you could disguise yourself as a guy. Especially with how much feminine features you have. The only one who could pass as a guy is Zipp!
I don't even know how to comment to that one.
11424838
1. Do keep in mind she's been in the same clothes for several days.
2. You mean, like, opera gloves? Don't be so cray-cray :smilyemoji!:
3. In fairness to Hitch, the Bulleid Spam Cans are very difficult to drive, simply because they are unlike any other steam locomotive on Earth.
4.
thumbs.dreamstime.com/b/row-traditional-s-semi-detached-homes-quiet-residential-area-rhos-sea-conwy-north-wales-uk-street-scene-contemporary-174324191.jpg
The bulk of Britain's housing stock consists of semi-detached properties built in the 1930s. Semi-detached refers to two houses built as a single unit, as opposed to several houses forming on continous block of buildings as was more common in the Victorian period.
5.
i.imgflip.com/5pmrli.jpg
6. I agree with that. Zipp would have the easiest time passing as a boy. According to some people, her voice is unusually deep for a girl.
7. As you've probably spotted, a core theme in this story is regional stereotyping. This is a tweak of the source material as adapting the speciesism of the G5 movie directly to the human world wouldn't work.
11424911
True. But then she wore that fancy dress during the concert too.
Not opera gloves. Gloves like what Elsa wore.
Oh. I had no idea.
That's a nice looking setting.
And, Zipp also has short hair and she isn't as curvy as the other gals. So all she would need is a change of clothes and she can pass for a man.
Point taken. And I think the stereotyping is a lot more humane than racism.
11424949
1...Thanks for the reminder.
2. True.
3 and 4. Indeed.
5. Her androgynous appearance has produced much fanfic fuel.
6. To be honest with you, I lack the skills to pull a critique of racism off. I'm not really sure what new I could bring to the table beyond 'racism is wrong', aka something that is rather obvious.
Same.
would have*
Well that's just great.
It's better than knowing Izzy is an orphan like how she is in the show.
I can tell where Izzy's line is from.
Sounds kinda ridiculous if you ask me.
That plan is 10 times better than Pipp's idea.
11425086
Indeed
11425085
Thanks for spotting the error.
Astonishingly, a lot of people don't know the 'oh no! anyway' meme originates from Top Gear.
You'll find out more about the plan tomorrow.
11425091
You said it, dude.