Under The Light of Dusk

by applejackofalltrades

In Her Mind

It came. The day everypony was waiting for. The first day of Harvest season. Despite the chill in the air teasing the uncertain winter weather, all of the underground residents were buzzing with anticipation. It would be the first of many weeks with enough food. And with the way that the Apples and their farmhoofs had been working, there would be plenty to spare.

The party decorations on the wall had certainly helped to bring everypony's mood up as well. It turned out that Pinkie Pie and Applejack's trip to Pinkie's cave a month back had been a success, and they brought back as much as they could. Keeping morale high was important, after all.

The balloons and streamers strewn around were fall colours. Red, oranges, and yellows, although in Rainbow's opinion, it reminded her more of the Apples than their apple harvest. Which wasn't such a bad thing, she reflected. After all, it was their farm that had been keeping everypony alive.

It felt selfish to admit it, but Rainbow Dash was excited that she, too, could have food every day. She and the rest of the rebels, of course, and if it came down to it, she would be happy to give up a meal for somepony else. She just hoped it wouldn't come to that.

Something about the balloons put her on edge. It's not like she expected anything bad to happen, it was just a feeling that she couldn't shake. Her eyes remained fixed on the orange balloon, and then it hit her. It's been a while since she's properly seen any of the Apples, namely Applejack. The orange mare showed up to the weekly debriefs and completed her guard shifts as usual, but other than that, she had been up on the farm almost exclusively.

Rainbow Dash certainly wasn't complaining or blaming her. It had always been this way, and usually, she would be more worried about her own goals and achievements driving her to do her work as fast as possible. Now, Rainbow Dash assumed that what drove her was the need to help others. Maybe she could help too.

She headed for the tunnel that headed up to the farm. The breeze hit her directly, giving her goosebumps. She shook them off before continuing, noting the quality of the wood. It was fine and should last up to, if not through, the winter. Unlike the last time she had gone up to check for Applejack, the sun was rising instead, causing it to shine directly in her eyes. The burning lasted a moment until her eyes grew accustomed to the light. It was always sobering getting to experience daily life as if everything was normal.

"Howdy, Dash." Unlike last time, Rainbow Dash was fortunate enough to run into Applejack immediately. She noticed the sweat gleaming off of her fur despite the colder wind chill. "What brings you up here?" The wound on her cheek was healing nicely, Rainbow thought, and thankfully it didn’t need any stitching, so hopefully, it wouldn’t scar.

Rainbow Dash dug a little hole in the floor with her hoof, pretending to think something over. "I was wondering if you guys needed any help up here?" As soon as she said it, she felt ridiculous. It's not like Rainbow Dash had any real experience on a farm, save for the times that she had come to Sweet Apple Acres to check out the apple-bucking harvest. Those were always fun visits.

Applejack removed her hat, using it to fan her face for a moment. "Uh, I think we have as many hooves as we need," she replied, looking up at the sun with a squint.

Rainbow Dash visibly frowned, and not just with her face. "Yeah, of course." She looked behind her at the tunnel. "Um, if you need anything I'll be back inside." With a tiny smile, she retreated, not watching for Applejack's reaction. She secretly hoped that Applejack would stop her, but wasn't surprised when she didn't. It was stupid of her anyway. Rainbow Dash turned around one last time, but Applejack was already gone.

She made her way back down, her visit being extremely short-lived. She found herself needing something to do before she spiralled into some kind of meltdown. Her mind went to the one place it always did in situations like these, but after her encounter with Applejack, she wasn't exactly in the mood. So she figured she'd do the next best thing.

And the next thing Rainbow knew, she was at the animal care tent. She looked inside, catching a peek at the animals inside. There was a raccoon with some kind of bandage on its body and a mole with a cast on its leg. Deciding that she would be of no help at all, and the inside of the tent seemed empty, Rainbow Dash went around back to the section that was left for the ponies who worked there. She slowly stuck her head between the opening.

"Hello, Rainbow Dash." A light yellow mare with a blue mane greeted Rainbow with a friendly smile.

"Hey, Dr. Fauna," she replied with an equally friendly smile. "How are things?"

An important part of being a leader is maintaining a good rapport with the ponies you were leading. Or in this case, trying to protect.

"Things are splendid," Dr. Fauna told her eagerly. "What brings you here so early in the morning?"

Truth be told, Rainbow Dash had a hard time sleeping the night prior. That is to say, she hadn't slept. There was no particular reason for it, and she didn't exactly feel sleepy, but she was needing something to occupy her time.

But as a good leader, she couldn't let other ponies worry about her. "Well, I just couldn't sleep much after the amazing party that Pinkie threw, you know?" She chuckled softly to accentuate her point. "But right now, I'm just looking for Fluttershy. Have you seen her?"

Dr. Fauna shook her head. "No, she usually comes in around this time or a little later, so she might just be back at home still." She smiled a little. "I suggest going there, and if she's not there then check back here."

Rainbow Dash nodded. "Okay, thanks for all the help." She glanced back at the tent, remembering the animals she saw. "It seems like you have your hoofs full. Sorry to bother you," she apologized with a smile.

“Oh, don’t worry about it. It’s always a pleasure seeing you, Rainbow Dash.” Dr. Fauna waved at her as Rainbow Dash turned around to leave.

It really wasn’t a difficult task to find someone. There are not many ponies to distract you, and the space isn’t that large. The problem was knowing if that pony wanted to be found, and as Rainbow Dash knew, Fluttershy could be a wild card sometimes.

The two pegasi had grown up together, so Rainbow Dash knew all about how Fluttershy acted, and even then it was hard to predict. She found Fluttershy’s home quickly. It was small, noticeably smaller than most other pony’s, but it was definitely comfy. She opened the door slowly, making sure there was enough time for Fluttershy to notice and tell her to leave if she was about to walk in on anything. It smelled like animals, which wasn’t that off-putting considering it was Fluttershy’s home.

“Hey, Fluttershy? You around?” She peeked into the room. It was a much more open concept area than her own home, but she assumed it was because she needed as much space as she could get as somepony who works with animals. She noticed her bed in the corner of the visible room, and what she assumed to be Fluttershy still under the covers. “Oh, brother,” Rainbow Dash groaned.

She walked over to Fluttershy quietly, doing her best to not startle her awake. While she did want to wake her up, she knew better than to scare her to achieve those results. Fluttershy was definitely still asleep when Rainbow Dash came to look at the lump under the bedsheets. They looked incredibly warm. Carefully, Rainbow lifted a hoof to prod Fluttershy on the side softly. “Shy? You up?”

An unappreciative groan was the answer. She assumed that Fluttershy had probably been up late taking care of a mouse or some other woodland creature and hadn’t realized that it was late for her standards. Of course, it was still early by Rainbow Dash’s standards, and after weeks of deciding, the rebellion agreed on weekly meetings as long as everypony worked out shifts for themselves. It was working well so far, Rainbow got to sleep in a bit more, something she definitely missed doing.

Fluttershy shifted under the covers, lifting the sheet to completely cover her head, leaving only the end of her long pink mane sticking out. “Just five more minutes,” she mumbled.

Rainbow Dash glared at Fluttershy, even though she couldn’t see her doing it. For being somepony so nice, she was always so grumpy if you tried to wake her up when she was tired, especially if you happened to be Rainbow Dash. “Come on, Fluttershy, the sun’s already coming up and Dr. Fauna needs your help with some animals,” she told her, trying to entice Fluttershy to wake up.

Surprisingly, it didn’t work as well as she’d hoped. Fluttershy stuck her head out from under the covers, sniffled, and returned to the darkness of the sheets. Was she crying? “Are you crying?” Rainbow hadn’t meant to ask it out loud, but she figured that it was probably the right thing to ask anyway, even if she hadn’t meant for it to come out as harshly as it did.

Fluttershy’s voice was barely audible from underneath. “No,” she muttered. “I’m just feeling sick.” She sniffled again, and Rainbow Dash wasn’t sure if it was true or not.

She sat on the edge of the bed, making sure to not sit on Fluttershy or her ridiculously long tail. I mean, who can manage that? She grinned at the idea of having such a long tail. While her own tail wasn’t exactly short, it couldn’t even hold a candle to the length of Fluttershy’s. She prodded her again. “Sick, huh? How’d that happen? Was it the damp atmosphere? The cold?” She gasped in exaggerated suspense. “No. It couldn’t be. Was it the animals?”

A giggle. That’s exactly what Rainbow Dash wanted to hear. Crying or not, it always felt good to make Fluttershy happy. Fluttershy uncovered her head completely for more than a moment, and Rainbow Dash got a good look at her. She definitely seemed sick. “I don’t think it was the animals,” Fluttershy told her softly. “But it has been getting cold out,” she pointed out, punctuating the end of her sentence with a sneeze.

“Bless you,” Rainbow Dash said automatically. “And yeah, tell me about it. I went up just now to see if they needed any help up there and when the wind hit me, I almost regretted it,” she joked, demonstrating how cold it was by shivering dramatically.

Fluttershy laughed quietly. "Stop, you're making my throat hurt," she complained, rubbing her neck. "Did you get to see Applejack? I haven't seen her since last week's meeting," she asked with a frown.

Rainbow Dash tilted her head. "Ehh, I saw her, but she was busy," she told her, not realizing how much it actually bothered her. "I didn't want to annoy her, so I came down and decided to look for you."

Fluttershy smiled. "Well, you found me. I feel bad about Dr. Fauna, though. I'm usually there by now," she admitted bashfully.

Rainbow Dash scoffed. "Don't worry about it, I'm sure she can handle it," she reassured her. "Plus, you can't be as much help if you're sick. You should focus on getting better so you can be back to a hundred percent quicker!"

Not to Rainbow's surprise, Fluttershy hesitated before nodding reluctantly. "You're right," she agreed. She completely uncovered herself, taking a moment to shiver before sitting up on the cot. "I should probably go tell her I can't help out today."

"Nah, I'll go tell her for you that way you won't have to leave." She smirked at Fluttershy before continuing. "Besides, knowing you, you'd feel bad and decide you might as well stay if you're already there." I know your logic, Shy.

Even less surprisingly, Fluttershy blushed in embarrassment, taking the time to try to hide in her own mane. "I wouldn't do that," she mumbled. Rainbow knew better, though.

"I'll be back in a flash.” She looked at Fluttershy and put a hoof on her back. "I'll try to find Zecora. Maybe she'll have something that can help," she thought out loud.

Fluttershy responded with only a small nod and a cough. Rainbow Dash jumped off of Fluttershy's small cot and stretched out her wings. She didn't like flying in the cave, but since there was a reason to, she didn't want to pass up the opportunity. The trip needed to be as fast as possible, after all. She looked back at Fluttershy one more time, waving a hoof quickly, then took to the air, staying a few hoof lengths above the floor. She kicked the door closed and narrowed her eyes in anticipation.

---

The trip had not been as fast as Rainbow Dash expected. First, Dr. Fauna seemed to have disappeared into thin air along with the animals that were in the tent. After ten minutes of waiting, Rainbow grew exasperated and decided to leave a messily written note explaining that Fluttershy was sick and would be staying home.

Next, she had intended to go see Zecora, but her stand was closed, and presumably empty as well. It was not until then that Rainbow realized that she never really knew where Zecora went when she wasn't at her potion stand. The only place that Rainbow Dash could think of finding her was outside, given that most times she didn't see the zebra at all in the cave. It made sense, she had to find ingredients somehow. How she would manage to always avoid any of Twilight’s patrols was beyond her, though.

At the speed at which she was flying, it was unsurprising that she only nearly avoided colliding with multiple ponies before she got up in the sky. But she couldn't get herself to slow down. She missed the speed. She relished it, and she never noticed how much it would suck to languish in a grounded life. It sure seemed grounded, one way or another.

The velocity that she travelled at only brought back memories. Memories of flight school, of the Wonderbolt Academy, and most importantly, of being a Wonderbolt. Pure bliss; she was living her dreams. And then her world came crashing down around her. But she wasn't the only pony that was having it rough, so there was no use feeling sorry for herself.

She couldn't help but remember the feeling, though. How it felt to fly the first time she could remember. Her first race, which she actually lost. The resolve to be better, and the win streak that came with it. Her sonic rainboom, and her cutie mark. Flying with the Wonderbolts, becoming a Wonderbolt. It was everything she could ever want, and by the power of Celestia herself, she would get it back somehow.

Although, Rainbow figured out that being lost in her memories wasn’t necessarily a good thing. Now, Rainbow was always a very focused flyer, even if she was thinking. But thinking is different than reliving important moments in your life, and so Rainbow found herself spiralling to the ground. She didn't know how, or why. Maybe she clipped a cloud, or the wind caught her wing in a weird way. No matter what had happened, she knew it was a beginner's mistake. And she didn't try to fix it.

Hitting the ground hurt. It didn't happen to her often, but it had happened enough for Rainbow to recognize that nothing incredibly bad had happened. She would probably just be sore when she woke up the next day. Still, she checked herself over, noting that the only thing that really hurt was her head. What else would she expect from crashing headfirst into the ground, though?

Maybe she wanted to stop thinking. That sure was a heck of a way to do it, though. She swore to herself that next time she'd actually stop herself from plummeting into the dirt. It'd be better to find a nice, cold cloud and stick her head in it.

It wasn't until she tried to get up that she found herself to be a bit woozy. And surrounded by plants. She shook the dizziness off and noticed she was standing in the middle of a field of corn. Luckily, she seemed to have landed in a section that was already harvested, which brought up a whole different array of thoughts, namely excitement.

Then, it got worse. She heard rustling and the sound of hoofsteps. Because of course there had to be somepony to witness her stupidity. She thought about flying away, but she couldn't get her wings to do what she wanted. Instead, she sat on the ground, surrounded by fallen stalks of corn, in a small trench she had made with her face. She didn't even bother to try to clean off her coat. There was just one pony she hoped wouldn't come through the crop.

"I know I turned you away earlier, Dash, but I'da never guessed you'd be this darn excited to help with the harvest," a familiar voice said. It just had to be that pony, didn’t it? Did the universe have some kind of vendetta against Rainbow Dash? It sure seemed like it sometimes. "Although I have to say, this ain't how you harvest corn." Applejack stood over her, offering a hoof to help her up. Rainbow Dash accepted it. It was only polite, right?

"Very funny," Rainbow Dash deadpanned. She compared the state of her own dirt-covered fur to Applejack's. "Well, at least I look the part, judging from your coat," she teased.

Applejack whacked Rainbow Dash on the shoulder. "At least I worked to look like this. You just fell," she shot back.

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "Okay, very impressive. What, did you roll around in some dirt or something?" She swiped some loose soil off of Applejack's muzzle with a teasing grin.

Applejack surely would have been offended if it was anypony else, but the two of them had a mutual understanding of their friendship, which often included taking friendly stabs at each other. They both knew that the other didn't mean it, and in the end, they laughed about it to signify that nopony went too far. Although, Rainbow Dash would definitely let Applejack know if she went too far, and she knew that Applejack would do the same.

Even though Applejack was physically larger than Rainbow Dash due to her life on the farm, the sleek, made-for-flying pegasus had no problem acting like she was the bigger pony, and enjoyed teasing Applejack as such. It was only fair for Applejack to know that she was the bigger pony and tease her back.

There was no exception this time as Applejack shoved Rainbow Dash with a competitive grin, causing her to stumble back. Rainbow Dash narrowed her eyes, recognizing the challenge. And then the two were in an impromptu wrestling match. The scuffle dirtied up their fur much more than crashing into the ground at breakneck speeds, somehow.

And as it turned out often, Applejack was victorious once again, sitting on Rainbow Dash's back, keeping her pinned on the floor. She looked down at Rainbow with an amused grin, silently daring her to rile her up again. "Say it," Applejack demanded with a joking firmness to her voice.

Rainbow Dash sighed and rolled her eyes. "You're stronger than me, Applejack, and you always will be," she deadpanned, rubbing a rock that was on the floor.

"I reckon that lacked some emotion," Applejack started, earning her a glare from the defeated pony beneath her. "But I guess it'll do." She got off of Rainbow Dash's back and offered her hoof again, this time being the reason that she was on the floor in the first place. "Didja forget how to fly or something?"

Rainbow Dash extended her wings, flapping them a few times to remove as much dirt as possible. She'd need a good preening later. "No, I just got distracted and fell."

Applejack narrowed her eyes. "And you didn't have time to correct yourself?"

Of course she did. She was a Wonderbolt after all. That was one of the most basic things any decent pegasus could do, especially with the time that Rainbow Dash had before hitting the ground.

"No," she lied.

"Now that ain't true," Applejack stated firmly. She saw right through Rainbow Dash, which wasn't that surprising considering her whole thing was honesty. Applejack forced Rainbow to look her in the eyes. "Did you see somethin' or other?" Her voice sounded worried rather than upset at Rainbow for lying.

Rainbow Dash shook her head. She tried to maintain eye contact, but couldn't. Instead, she looked at the crop laying around them. "No," she repeated, although this time she wasn't lying. "I got caught up in some memories, and I'm not sure how I started falling." She hesitated, trying to find an explanation but found none. "I didn't even try," she admitted with a shrug.

She felt a hoof on her shoulder, although it was placed much more gently than before. "What kinda memories were they?" Applejack's voice was soft and inviting. It was different from the hard tone she usually spoke with, and even though Rainbow Dash wasn't feeling bad, it somehow made her feel better.

She thought back to how it felt to fly fast with a purpose. Her ear twitched. "I was remembering how much I love flying—" She cut herself off. "How much I loved flying," she corrected herself. "And then I started remembering flight school, and the Wonderbolts and everything and the next thing I knew, the floor was getting closer."

Applejack blinked slowly. "You can still love something even if ya don't get to do it often," she pointed out. "I'm lucky enough to have what I love right here on the farm, but I know you don't get the chance to fly as often as ya'd like." She pushed on Rainbow's shoulder softly, a sign of unspoken affection that the two of them understood.

"Thanks, AJ." Rainbow looked at the damage she had made on the floor with a frown. "I know it sounded like I… I wanted it to go wrong, but I didn't." She spoke resolutely, looking back at Applejack's face. "I was being stupid."

"So you don't want to fall," Applejack confirmed carefully. "You can tell me if yer having bad thoughts," she offered.

"I need to be here for everyone," Rainbow affirmed.

"That ain't what I said."

Rainbow Dash lowered her ears slightly. She looked away from Applejack for a moment. She didn't want to think about it, but Applejack was right. The only thing keeping Rainbow Dash from disappearing was that she felt like she had a responsibility to help everypony get past everything.

Rainbow Dash was failing. She was supposed to be leading the group that would turn everything around and fix it. Instead, she'd been responsible for so many bad things, and as much as her friends tried to tell her it wasn't her fault, she knew it was. Who else's fault would it be? They got taken at her command. Under her leadership, she had lost so many ponies. She didn't want to be in charge anymore. But she didn't want to step down, she just didn't want to be here anymore.

"I need to fix things," she stated firmly. She looked back up at her worried friend's eyes. "I need to fix everything I've done for everypony I've let down."

Applejack didn't seem satisfied with her answer. "I know you think it's your fault, but it ain't. And I know ya ain't gonna believe me, but you know I'm not a liar. Nopony blames you, Dash, because it simply just wasn't your fault. Losing you would be…" She trailed off, and took off her hat, holding it close to her body. "Well, it'd be awful. I can't imagine what goes through yer head, but I know it ain't pretty. I just want you to know that we don't blame you, and you are a great leader. I can't imagine somepony better to lead us than you, Rainbow Dash."

She didn't know when she started crying, but all of a sudden, she was hyper-aware of the tears on her cheeks. Applejack didn't seem to mind though. Instead, she carefully wrapped Rainbow Dash in a hug. It was strange. Rainbow Dash usually never liked hugs, and Applejack certainly wasn't the type to offer them, but regardless, Rainbow Dash found herself hugging her back. It was a tight hug on Applejack's end, and Rainbow Dash let herself fall limp in her friend's grip, but it made her feel better. She knew she was feeling bad after all.

Finally, Rainbow Dash removed herself from Applejack's embrace. Applejack looked as close to crying as Applejack ever got. Rainbow Dash knew that Applejack was not the emotional type, and normally, neither was she, but they both seemed to have gotten riled up. It was good to let it out, though.

Rainbow Dash awkwardly pushed some dirt back into the crevasse she had made. "Sorry about your crops," she apologized with a half-smile.

"Don't worry about it," Applejack reassured her. "We got this corn already anyway. I reckon the critter that was digging up our corn before mighta been you all along," she teased with a playful smile.

Rainbow Dash chuckled lightly. "Maybe." She dipped her head at Applejack. "Thanks a lot for what you said. I didn't know I even needed to talk."

"Well, 'course. What are friends for?" She placed her hat back on her head and tipped it slightly. "I'm all ears if you ever need to talk again," she reminded her.

Rainbow nodded, acknowledging the offer and filing it in her head. She might need it sometime. "Well, I'm sure you're busy, so I'd better get back to Fluttershy before she gets worried sick." She snorted at her own comment. "Well, before she gets worried more sick."

"More sick? Well, if Fluttershy's feelin' sick, I can make her some of Granny's famous recipe apple cider," she offered. "That'll be sure to make her feel right as rain and twice as fresh!"

Rainbow shook her head slightly at Applejack's choice of words. "Don't you have more work to do?"

"Of course I do," Applejack responded quickly. "But I reckon they can manage things up here for a little bit. Besides, this is just as important! One of my friends ain't feelin' right. I can't be expected to put that to the side."

"Are you sure you're not the element of loyalty?" Rainbow Dash nudged Applejack firmly as they walked side by side. They laughed together as they went toward the barn to make the cider for Fluttershy.

Author's Note:

Lmfao I'm so sorry this one's late, I totally lost track of time. Anyway, enjoy! Bit of a time skip between the last non-flashback chapter and this one.

Comments

[Silver Mint]

Lovely chapter, it's nice to see them have tender and soft moments considering what they're living through. And I think we've seen the Mane Six by now with Fluttershy here?

As always, I can't wait for more, sorry for reading this one so late

[applejackofalltrades]

10889617
Gotta get a good mix of nice moments in there, too.

And don't apologize! I mean I definitely posted it late. You're not obligated to read right away ^^ Thanks for the comment

[The Blacksmith]

"I reckon the critter that was digging up our corn before mighta been you all along,"

Why do I have a bad feeling about this ‘critter’