Finieous Fingers and the mediocre crossover

by Ellery Quinn

The even more cliched and increasingly poorly written adventures of finieous fingers or How to hire adventurers with a musical number ripped off from the greatest showman

Author's Note:

Lyrics copyright disney

the music for the number

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9A3oMbstqko

"Tell me again why we're in this town Finieous?" mused Charly as they strolled through the village known as Ponyville.

Finieous shrugged, "The writer simply wanted to speed things up. On a different note, where can we get some nice work for a couple warriors and thief. "

They started to notice that there were signs advertising a job perfect for them.

Wanted

Heroes of the highest caliber of skill

Apply within the castle of friendship

It didn't take them long to find it (it is a large crystal castle after all) and found they were the only ones interested in the job.

When they entered they were they were immediately grilled by a blue pegasus with a rainbow striped name (I mean mane, but my typo is accurate too) . Finieous then had the pony,horse, whatever the term is pushed up against his-her beak (this rule 63 stuff was confusing her).

"You don't look awesome enough to be able to take an evil wizard! Drop and give me 50 !"

Finieous, Rupert, Charly, and Fred all joined in, mainly because they were too scared to do otherwise. They were soon all tired out, but the pegasus seemed satisfied.

They were ushered to a crystal table where what looked like a map of this whole crazy place. At the head was what looked like a purple unicorn with wings.

"My name is Twilight Sparkle. I was hoping to find some heroes that could help us defeat an evil wizard who is threatening Equestria.

Finieous scoffed. "This tiny village? What's the use in conquering that?"

The unicorn motioned to the map. "All of this is Equestria actually."

Finieous than had a thought. "How much am I getting paid for this job?"

Charly interrupted. "Finieous, you mean what we get?"

"Hush. You're only a Henchman so I give you your regular paycheck."

"Anyways, what's my cut?"

"We send you home."

"How'd you know we weren't from here."

"It was obvious from your lack of the knowledge of our world. Are you humans usually?"

"Yes, Rupert's a half-elf though, but what payment upfront?"

Twilight sighed.

Right here, right now
I put the offer out
I don't want to chase you down
I know you see it
You run with me
And I can cut you free
Out of the drudgery and walls you keep in
So trade that typical for something colorful And if it's crazy, live a little crazy
You can play it sensible, a king of conventional
Or you can risk it all and see...

Don't you wanna get away from the same old part you gotta play?
'Cause I got what you need
So come with me and take the ride
It'll take you to the other side
'Cause you can do like you do
Or you can do like me
Stay in the cage, or you finally take the key
Oh, damn! Suddenly you're free to fly
It'll take you to the other side

Finieous smirked:

Okay, my friend, you wanna cut me in
Well, I hate to tell you, but it just won't happen
So thanks, but no
I think I'm good to go
'Cause I quite enjoy the life you say I'm trapped in
Now I admire you, and that whole show you do
You're on to something, really it's something
But I live among the swells, and we don't pick up peanut shells
I'll have to leave that up to you

Don't you know that I'm OK with this uptown part I get to play?
'Cause I got what I need and I don't wanna take the ride
I don't need to see the other side
So go and do like you do
I'm good to do like me
Ain't in a cage, so I don't need to take the key
Oh, damn! Can't you see I'm doing fine?
I don't need to see the other side

Now is this really how you'd like to spend your days?
Whiskey and misery, and parties and plays?

If I were mixed up with you, I'd be the talk of the town
Disgraced and disowned, another one of the clowns

But you would finally live a little, finally laugh a little
Just let me give you the freedom to dream and it'll
Wake you up and cure your aching
Take your walls and start 'em breaking
Now that's a deal that seems worth taking
But I guess I'll leave that up to you

Well, it's intriguing, but to go would cost me greatly
So what percentage of the show would I be taking?

Fair enough, you'd want a piece of all the action
I'd give you seven, we could shake and make it happen

I wasn't born this morning, eighteen would be just fine

Why not just go ahead and ask for nickels on the dime

Fifteen

I'd do eight

Twelve

Maybe nine

Ten!

They shook. "Deal."

They both began to sing,

Don't you wanna get away to a whole new part you're gonna play
'Cause I got what you need, so come with me and take the ride
To the other side
So if you do like I do
So if you do like me
Forget the cage, 'cause we know how to make the key
Oh, damn! Suddenly we're free to fly
We're going to the other side
So if you do like I do
(To the other side)
So if you do like me
(We're going to the other side)
'Cause if we do we're going to the other side
We're going to the other side

As the last note died, Finieous took a breath. "Wow. First musical number, and not bad, other than the author crudely pasting the lyrics and not even changing them to fit the circumstances.."

"I haven't done a number like that since season 9 ended."

Both realized that this was no time for 4th wall breaks, especially since it was out of character for Twilight.

There was work to be done.