Too Many Pinkie Trips

by RCharge

Next stop: Maretonia

After exiting the throne room, Sunburst decided they should wait off to the side for their guide. Not even a few minutes later, a seafoam-colored seapony swam up to the entrance and adjusted a satchel strap on his shoulder. The satchel emitted some rather ominous rattling that he seemed to ignore. Once satisfied, he pulled out a piece of paper, and appeared to be studying it intently. After a few moments, he glanced up and muttered something to himself as his head drifted back and forth.

When he noticed Pinkie and Sunburst, he quickly perked up and made his way over to them. "Oh, you must be the two I was told were waiting for me! My name's Riptide, and I'll be your guide for this little excursion on the seafloor. Follow me!" he announced as he began slowly swimming away from the duo. Pinkie and Sunburst exchanged an unsure glance before following him.

As they swam, the diffused light of the palace slowly faded into obscurity, and the laughter of energetic foals slowly died down. As they neared the outskirts, Sunburst and Pinkie noticed that the houses were sparse on this side of Seaquestria; in the center of the city, houses were every few feet. Out here, they could go for several minutes without seeing one. Soon, the only thing that remained was the coral reef that grew along the seafloor. The ethereal darkness permeated their vision, not allowing them to see more than a few feet in front of their faces.

As the murky shadows slowly engulfed them, Sunburst spoke up, “S-so, uh, it’s getting kinda dark now. M-maybe we should have some sort of light to guide us?” The seapony in front of them stopped for a moment, facehoofed, and turned around to head back in the direction of Seaquestria.

Sunburst was just about to wonder if they should follow him when the seapony paused. He patted himself down, as if looking around for something. When his forehoof brushed against a piece of fabric, he rested the frog of his other hoof against his forehead before fiddling with something on the side of the fabric.

With a groan of protest, a clicking sound could be heard as something came undone. The duo only watched as he fished around for something inside the satchel. “Aha! Here we go!” he declared as he pulled out a small round object with an indent on the front. Giving the indent a twist, a flash of light illuminated the murky water surrounding them. “I nearly forgot that I already had my deep sea diving gear. Here, take one of these spelunking helmets; they should help light your way. Just give the knob a twist!”

Riptide dug into his satchel, retrieving a helmet for Pinkie and Sunburst, who graciously accepted it. After helping to strap the helmet onto their heads, he resumed their trek to the seafloor. Angler fish hastily retreated from the light their helmets gave off. “Now that we’re out of the city, our first stop should be around here somewhere…” Riptide mused, mostly to himself, as he rubbed his chin with his hoof. “If I remember the directions from my last visit, it should be right after this section of—”

“What’re we looking for?” Riptide was jolted out of his reverie by Pinkie suddenly appearing at his side, which caused him to squirm away from her.

“Gah!” was all that he managed to choke out before taking a few deep breaths. “Skies above! You nearly gave me a heart attack! To answer your question, I’m looking for a specific monument around here.”

In the distance, a silhouette quickly came into focus amidst the backdrop of coral and shadows. “Ah! It should be up ahead!” A few minutes of swimming brought them to a dilapidated marble temple.

Seaweed slithered along the worn walls, exposing several holes where the salt water corroded the once pristine marble. Portions of still intact walls were cracked and discolored with age. If Riptide noticed, he didn’t seem to care as he cleared his throat and seamlessly transitioned into tour guide mode. “Our first stop today will bring us to the ruined temple of Sacanus. Not much is known about Sacanus, except that his staff has been rumored to be able to control weather patterns across all of Equus.”

After a few moments, they were led into the temple. Paintings hung upon the walls, their canvases now blank due to being submerged in seawater. Whatever was on them was lost to the ravages of time. The guide stopped at a wall bearing what looked like a hoof-carved mural of a unicorn wielding a wooden stick that forked at the tip to create a makeshift staff. A sky blue crystal was nestled in a groove at the top, with a bluish-white glow emanating from it.

“Is that what I think it is?” Sunburst asked as Pinkie floated closer to the wall.

“It looks like a staff of some sort, Sunny!” Pinkie declared, which only earned her an eye roll from Sunburst.

“This is an early depiction of what we have come to know as the Staff of Sacanas,” Riptide announced as he gestured to the mosaic. “During the time of the three tribes, it is unknown if anyone knew the true intention of this particular staff, or if it even had a name. All we know is that it was used to control the weather during pre-Equestrian times.” Riptide coughed into the frog of his hoof. “Its origin is currently unknown, but from some accounts we discovered during various studies, we theorize it was near where the tribes first settled. Allegedly, a unicorn saw an unusual cloud pattern over a series of peaks that are known today as the Appleloosa Mountains. He went to investigate when a lightning bolt struck one of the peaks. Climbing to the top, he saw something embedded in one of the rock faces. He managed to pry it loose and brought it back to show the other tribes.”

Riptide gestured to another section that depicted a beam extending from the crystal to attach itself to a cloud. A final fresco displayed the cloud being moved by the beam, along with a sufficiently awe-stricken crowd. Each panel looked as if it were either meticulously preserved or lovingly recreated. “As you see here, unicorns were the primary ones to use the staff. A common theory at the time was that the staff required magic to function, so naturally the unicorn tribes claimed ownership of it. They decreed that, since they were the only ones with known magic at the time, that they should set the weather. Thus, the matter of weather manipulation was settled.”

"So, from this, we are left to theorize that the staff itself is magical?" Sunburst quipped as Riptide merely shrugged.

"From what little we know about the staff itself, we can gather that the only part that was is the crystal," he mentioned with a shrug. "All tests we conducted seemed to point to a similar conclusion: The body of the staff is just an oversized branch carved to look that way, which led us to theorize that the only part of the staff that appeared to hold any magic was the crystal. Now that we had time to study these murals, they seem to confirm our hypothesis. Let's move on, shall we?"

After a few moments, he continued on to another section. This time, it showed a mixture of pegasi and earth ponies being upset with a cloud. The next was a pegasus flying up to it and pushing it. The third one was a pegasus, situated behind the cloud with forelegs outstretched. A continuation of the depiction showed a now moved cloud, indicated by three lines extending from it towards the pony in question. They had wide eyes and a slack jaw as they stared at the cloud, with several ponies on the ground talking amongst each other.

“However, in time, even that didn’t last,” Riptide explained as he gestured to the display. “The other two tribes expressed disdain at the unicorn tribe’s haphazard arrangement of the weather. One day, a group of earth ponies and pegasi tribes were so upset with a cloud placement that they decided to move it themselves. Since the earth ponies had no means of reaching the cloud, it fell upon a member of the pegasus tribe to handle it. When they pushed, the cloud moved on demand. Naturally, this was a cause for alarm—”

“Let me get this straight,” Sunburst interjected as he glanced over at Riptide with one brow raised. “Are we led to believe that they just simply didn’t try to move it themselves in the past?”

“As much as I would like to say yes, I just don't know,” Riptide commented as Sunburst returned his attention to the mosaic. “From previous expeditions and accounts we unearthed, we’re led to assume that none of the members of the pegasus tribe attempted this before. It also might have something to do with the fact that they believed the only way to control the weather was with the staff.”

“But… but that doesn’t make any sense!” Sunburst retorted, raising his forelegs into the air for emphasis. “Pegasi fly in the air all the time! The probability of them not bumping into a cloud is astronomically small!” Sunburst began pacing, doubling over his steps as he transitioned into full-on rant mode. “From my previous research, they even made homes from the clouds—and that was before they united! I don’t understand why a pegasus moving a cloud would be a cause for alarm. I refuse to believe that they haven't tried this before in the past. There has to be a better explanation, and I’m—grrk!” Sunburst’s rant was cut short by Pinkie, who shoved a hoof into his mouth to silence him.

“Sunny. I know this is scientifically improbable, but this poor guy already told you that he didn’t know,” she commented as she gestured to Riptide, whose forelegs were raised in a placating gesture. “Do you think that maybe this can wait until after we get home? You’re wasting this poor guide’s time and ours with this pointless rant!” Sunburst’s gaze seemed to bore into Riptide, his eyes glinting with silent rage. After a while, his gaze gradually softened, yet his eyes never lost their focus on Riptide. “Think it can wait until later, when we can try and find some real answers?” she admonished as Sunburst stared back at her. After a few moments, he exhaled calmingly through his nostrils and meekly nodded, prompting Pinkie to remove her hoof. Riptide, greatly relieved that the situation was defused, lowered his forelegs and continued on.

He stopped in front of a fourth panel, with a mob of angry pegasi and earth ponies holding torches and pitchforks as they marched towards a village. “When they figured out that the unicorns were lying to them, the other two tribes became furious. They descended on one of their villages in an angry mob, most likely to demand answers.”

Without waiting for a response, Riptide continued down the passageway. Soon, another set of murals revealed itself. This time, one of each race appeared to be sitting around a table. One of them was holding a piece of paper, one was holding the staff, and another rested a hoof on the table. A small spider web of cracks could be seen tracing themselves along the earth pony’s side of the table. The three of them sat locked in what appeared to be a heated discussion. “The three races came together, one representative from each, in an attempt to settle the matter peacefully. Afterwards, the unicorns agreed that they should leave the weather control to the pegasi.” The next part showed three happy ponies working in unison. An earth pony tending to the land, a pegasus pushing a cloud in the sky, and a unicorn manipulating a tool of some sort. “Once the matter was settled, the three tribes coexisted in harmony. At least, until the next problem arose. Now, if you’ll follow me, we’re nearing the inner sanctum.”

A short time later, the passageway opened into a large antechamber. Crumbling pillars flanked a raised dais, which held an indentation inside of it. A translucent dome of rapidly circling air prevented the water from touching it. "And this chamber was the location of the fabled Staff of Sacanas. After recent events, Queen Novo decided that the sacred relic should be moved to an undisclosed location to help prevent something like that from reoccurring. Before the relic was moved, I was able to at least let visitors get close enough to take pictures. However, now there’s nothing left to see here." Turning around, Riptide returned to the entrance with Pinkie and Sunburst in tow.

Once outside, Sunburst took advantage of the silence. “Well, that was a waste of time,” he bluntly stated, which caused Riptide and Pinkie to turn to him.

“What do you mean, Sunny?” Pinkie raised an eyebrow at Sunburst’s comment. “I learned a whole lot! That wasn’t a waste of time for me!”

“Pinkie. Do you know what I do for a living?” he retorted as he started pacing once again. “I’m a historian. We study historical accounts like these. We were there for… 30 minutes maybe? In that short time, do you know how much I learned?”

“Um, nothing?” she offered as Sunburst let out a dry laugh and resumed pacing.

“Precisely. Nothing. I came here in the hopes that I could learn something more at the source. The only thing I learned is that I’m wasting my time here.” Sunburst turned to Pinkie, swimming back over to her side. “C’mon, Pinkie, let’s go.” When he moved to grab her foreleg, she drifted it out of his reach.

“Go where, Sunny? Didn’t we just get here?” Pinkie raised an eyebrow as Sunburst nickered angrily.

“Do I really have to spell it out for you?” he groaned as one hoof pinched the bridge of his snout. “I’m going home, Pinkie. There’s nothing for me here when I already know as much or even more than our guide. Uh, no offense.” he added as Riptide lightly shrugged.

“None taken. I never claimed to be knowledgeable, I’m just a humble tour guide.” he mentioned as Sunburst returned his gaze to Pinkie.

“Satisfied?” he commented as Pinkie meekly nodded. “Good. Now, let’s go,” Sunburst muttered through gritted teeth as he grasped Pinkie’s foreleg. She didn’t make an attempt to avoid it this time. He began swimming in the direction of Seaquestria once more, with a confused Pinkie and a bewildered Riptide in tow.

A short time later, they found themselves outside of the palace, awaiting an audience with Queen Novo. Eventually, the guards allowed them to enter. They passed by a pair of sea ponies who didn’t look too thrilled about something. “Next!” Novo cried, but looked confused when she saw Pinkie and Sunburst enter. “You’re back already? I didn’t expect to see both of you again so soon. Is something wrong?”

“Yes, Queen Novo. I’m afraid we are going to have to cut this excursion short.” Novo raised an eyebrow, an unspoken request for Sunburst to continue, which he capitalized on. "This farce is an insult to my intelligence. I have learned something so fundamentally wrong that I must do more research about it in Equestria. I do apologize for this sudden departure, however I would rather not waste any more time here than is strictly necessary.”

Novo sat there with a stunned look on her face, unable to form words. Unfortunately for her, Pinkie took advantage of the silence. “Ooh, ooh, ooh! I just got an idea~!” she sing-songed as she swam over to Sunburst, cupping his cheeks in her hooves. “Why don’t we visit the Seaquestrian archives? I’m sure that they’ll have more histori-whatsits stored there!” she exclaimed as she released Sunburst’s cheeks. He lightly rubbed them with his hooves. “I’m sure that Novo won’t object to us taking a look. So, what d’ya say, Queenie? Will you let us visit the archives? Huh? Huh?”

After a few moments, Novo’s brain restarted itself with a most undignified sputter. “I—b-but… W-well, I suppose that I can allow you access to the archives, if that’s what you desire,” she offered and tilted her head. “However… there’s a slight problem with that.” Pinkie paused, glancing up at Novo. “It is getting late, and I do not want the both of you roaming about in there unattended. There are several relics I have placed in there that I wish to remain untouched. Come back tomorrow, and I shall arrange for an escort to bring you to the archives. Does that sound reasonable?”

“Hmm…” Pinkie raised her hoof to her chin. “Okie dokie lokie! C’mon, Sunny! We need to get some rest if we wanna be up bright and early to go see the archives!” she exclaimed as she grabbed one of Sunburst’s forelegs and dragged him out of the throne room.

“W-wait! Pinkie! You didn’t even let me explain myself!” he cried as he was lugged outside by Pinkie.

Novo simply stared at the open archway, a sigh escaping her lips as she watched them leave. “Farewell, Mr. Sunburst. Pinkie…” she commented, the barest hint of venom slipping into her voice near the end.

---

The sun began its slow descent in the sky as the airship floated towards its destination. Pinkie and Princess Luna were in the spa, enjoying a massage. Halfway through their treatment, the intercom crackled to life. “Good afternoon, passengers, this is your captain speaking. Thanks to clear skies and temperate conditions, we will be arriving at Maretonia within the hour. All passengers looking to disembark should begin congregating on the main deck within thirty minutes. We will be docking just outside the city, where we will remain until the next day. Thank you for your anticipated cooperation, and thank you for flying Canterlot Air. We hope you had a pleasant trip.”

After exiting the spa, Pinkie gathered her luggage and joined Luna on the deck of the ship. In the distance, a crescent-shaped island slowly came into view. A few airships could be seen docked at a port that resided at sea level. It was big enough for five airships to be docked at one of the several piers that encompassed the port in its entirety. Beyond the port, rolling hillsides gradually came into view as brick and mortar cottages could be seen dotting the landscape.

As the airship slowly descended toward the open docking spaces, a crowd appeared to be amassing just beyond the landing of the pier. Two ponies appeared to stand out from the crowd; one was a bronze-colored stallion that wore an open-air mauve hat embossed with gold trim and accented with fireworks and butterflies. A beard cut into the shape of a rectangle sat on his chin, and a tangled, overly poofy mane fanned down his neckline to end at his upper back. He proudly stood in front of the procession. A teal-colored robe concealed most of his form, starting at the neck and ending in an organized pile at his hooves. Resting on his back was a mauve-colored cloak with an embroidered aquamarine-colored design resembling a turtle shell.

Alongside him was a lithe white unicorn wearing a lavender robe complete with a red sash, along with a silver colored headdress that fanned out from a crimson-colored base. It was studded with what appeared to be a turquoise gem. A lavender-colored streak as well as red gems appeared to be embedded upon the headdress itself. Several ponies dressed in bronze plate and centurion helmets were stationed in a box formation at the landing’s edge. Each of them held a sarissa in one hoof and wore a tower shield upon the other, the straps just high enough on the foreleg to allow ease of movement without sacrificing accessibility.

As the ship touched down, a pair of guards approached the vessel and raised a ramp that connected with the lip of the deck. A procession, consisting of the two ponies and what appeared to be a pair of bodyguards, approached the deck. One of the guards travelled up the ramp and onto the ship. Noticing the lunar diarch, he approached her and bowed. “It is an honor to see representatives from our neighboring kingdom.” Turning to Pinkie, the guard paused and raised a hoof to his chin. “And I see that you’ve brought company, Your Highness. May I ask for her name?”

Princess Luna raised a hoof to her peytral and cleared her throat. “Verily, although the reason for our visit is less than pleasant,” she declared as she gestured to Pinkie with her hoof. “This mare accompanying us is Pinkamena Diane Pie, the Element of Laughter.”

“You can call me Pinkie Pie,” Pinkie quipped as she reappeared right next to the guard, one hoof held up to her mouth as if conveying a secret. “It’s much easier, trust me,” she stage-whispered as she retracted from him and returned to Luna’s side.

If the guard was surprised, he didn’t show it, and simply cleared his throat. “Very well. The Duke and Duchess await your company. We shouldn’t keep them waiting.” A general murmur of agreement was exchanged as the trio approached the ramp. The guard accompanying them stood near it as loud fanfare came from below. “Introducing the Duke and Duchess of Maretonia!” he formally announced right before the procession made their way up the ramp and onto the deck. When the Duke and Duchess stopped in front of Luna, they prostrated themselves before her. Pinkie lowered herself before the Duke and Duchess. Luna told them to rise a few moments later, and Pinkie quickly followed suit.

“Greetings, Princess Luna. We are honored that you have decided to come to our kingdom. Hopefully things are going well in Equestria?” the Duke asked as he shifted his position slightly. “I do hope this won’t complicate things.”

“Verily. Fear not, our visit is not to seek thine aid, if this is what troubles thee,” Luna stated, raising a hoof to forestall any objections. “Nay. The purpose of our visit is nothing but official business from the Crown. We are here to discuss matters with thee, nothing more. Now, if thou would kindly escort us to the palace, we can be in and out by the morrow.”

The Duke and Duchess exchanged curious glances before the Duke shrugged and turned around. “All business and no pleasure. I am surprised that your sister is not here with you. She’s usually the one to conduct the proceedings, if I recall. N-not that you making the trip alone is a bad thing of course, but—”

“Please, do calm yourself, good Duke,” Luna interjected as he turned to face her again. “We have decided to make the trip alone this time. Nothing more, nothing less.” She gestured to Pinkie with a foreleg. “Besides, we have brought an arbiter with us, and we feel that this is sufficient. Does this trouble you, good Duke? If it pleases you, shall we reconvene with the presence of our sister?”

The Duke was silent for a moment, before a gentle prod on his side from the Duchess snapped him from his stupor. “Oh! Um, n-no! No trouble at all! This talk is indeed overdue, is it not?” Having said his piece, the Duke spun around and made his way to the ramp. “Come along now, it’s a bit of a walk to the palace from here.”

They were led down the pier by one of the guards and towards a small building nestled against one of the cobblestone walls that flanked the port. As Pinkie and Luna made their way further into Maretonia, they noticed that most of the ponies in the procession had dispersed. Coming up on the plaza, the reason for this became evident rather quickly. A festival was laid out evenly among the available space, a ceremonial pyre lit in its center. Music wafted from the direction of it, and several ponies could be seen performing what looked to be an interpretive dance, its meaning all but lost on them.

Thankfully, the Duke and Duchess edged around the outskirts of the festival, the attendants not batting an eye at their presence. After a short trot, the Duke and Duchess led Pinkie and Luna down one of the side streets and away from the commotion of the plaza. In the distance, an opulent palace gradually came into view. When the sounds of the festival died down enough to be manageable, the Duchess took advantage of the silence. “Forgive me for prying, Princess Luna, but why exactly isn’t your sister here with you? Did something happen to Princess Celestia? We do enjoy seeing her during our little talks like this.”

“As we have stated before, we wished to undertake this venture personally. Our sister is most well, thank thee for asking. We merely expressed an interest in doing this ourselves.”

As they talked, the street branched off and headed past the side of the palace. “Naturally, our sister was not amused with our desire to attend this alone, but she respected our wishes and allowed us to ‘strike out on our own’, as the young ponies say.” As they walked, Luna glanced over at the palace itself.

Mosaic motifs lined the outside walls, displaying various moments of warfare. One of them had a stocky, peach-colored earth pony with a creased brow pacing back and forth in front of a line of spearponies. The earth pony was frozen mid-stride, allowing any and all onlookers to notice his cutie mark; a sword overlapping a shield. Squinting, Luna noticed that his mouth was open as if he was in the middle of giving the assembled army a verbal reprimanding.

Several other murals depicted members of their army locked in a fierce battle with other races. “Now that you have asked us a personal question, we feel it is only fair that we get to do the same. Has this been a common occurrence for your civilization?” Luna asked as she gestured at a few of the battle reenactments.

An uneasy silence coated the group in a murky fog. After a few moments, the Duke awkwardly cleared his throat. “Maretonia has had an… interesting past, Princess. We used to be a powerful civilization under Fill Whip the Third, the earth pony you see in front of the spearponies here. We’ve fought and conquered kingdoms that belonged to griffons, dragons, the occasional barbaric Yak tribe that threw themselves at us, as well as a few less than savory ones. However, things have become rather lax as of late. We’re still one of the strongest kingdoms out there, but we are nothing compared to what we once were.” Glancing back up at the wall, Luna saw a few that displayed cultural acts, mainly plays and some comedy routines.

“Please, come inside. Apparently, we have much to discuss,” the Duke sourly stated as the quartet filed into the palace.