Twisted Magic

by Wild & Lightning

Protologue

Pinkie Pie sat directly under the cloud house of the mare Rainbow Dash ,while shielding her eyes from the morning sun, she was jumping, trying to get high in the air so she could try to call to Rainbow, without waking up all of Ponyville.

Pinkie had about ten minutes before her shift at sugarcube corner started and she wanted to hang out with Rainbow like she did yesterday, When Rainbow had to wake up early for weather duty, and of course, she finished in ten seconds flat! So they talked for about 8 minutes before Dash had to go help Derpy with a flying coordination lesson.

After about fifteen minutes of fruitless jumping, she gave up, defeated. The pink mare started shuffling back to sugercube corner, the normal spring in her step had faded away to a dejected shuffle in the past few days. She didn't have to glance up to know that the Pegasus ponies where clearing the sky, twisting and turning in mid-air, laughing without a care in the world. She looked at her pink hooves as she shuffled back to sugercube corner, the thought of baking, frosting, delivering, and watching Pound Cake and Pumpkin Cake drained all the energy from her. She shuffled past her friend Twilight's Library, past Spike, who was taking out the garbage, and went on to a long day at work...

********************************

Spike watched Pinkie Pie shuffle past him. "Hey Pinkie!"

She heard him, but left no response, The faded pink mare just kept shuffling back to sugarcube corner.

"Hmmmm...." He went back inside the library. He saw the purple unicorn Twilight Sparkle "Twilight... Has Pinkie... Been acting uh.. Different around you, or anypony in the matter?" the purple dragon asked, his brows furrowed in worry for their pink, sugar filled friend.

"Spike, don't be so-so.. Weird! Pinkie is always happy and...-" she cut off, realizing that Pinkie HAS been acting strangely upset. "Well, now that I think about it, yes. She has been acting strange." Twilight thought for a moment "I'm going to go talk to her and ask her what is wrong" She decided.

"Isn't she at work?" Spike asked, raising a brow at the purple pony

"She has been working there for Celestia knows how long, Spike. I'm sure Mr. And Mrs. Cake won't mind her taking a break" she neighed stubbornly

"Ok...anyways, I think I'm going to stay here and clean the library a bit, I'm not into girl drama much" Spike said.

"Uhh, No I think it would be best if you came with me." Twilight said glaring at her assistant

"What, you dont trust you number one assistant?!" Spike puffed out his chest a bit, having the same cocky attitude as Rainbow Dash, That lasted for about a second.

Twilight kept her glare on Spike silencing him for a mere second

"HEY!! THAT WAS ONE TIME!" Spike pouted

"And its not happening again, lets go"

Twilight trotted over to Spike and her horn glowed, with A flash of purple light Spike blinked, and saw that they where right outside Sugercube corner.

*************************************

Twilight trotted in "Pinkie!" she called, and the bright pink earth pony came out of the kitchen.

"Twilight? I was not expecting you here" The words stumbled out of the Party pony's mouth as she spoke without emotion and kept a straight face.

"Well I wanted to talk to you, can you take a break?" Twilight asked Pinkie

"Erm I dunno Twilight"

Twilight gave Pinkie a stare that would put Fluttershy's stare to the tombstone.

"Sure Twilight" she followed ,grumbling something nopony could understand,Twilight outside, still dragging her hooves along with her as she walked.

"Pinkie... You have been acting differently lately, is something wrong?" Twilight asked

Pinkie looked down, scuffing a hoof in the dirt "No... N-Nothing is wrong" she neighed quietly

"Yes there is, and I want to know" Twilight said firmly, her purple eyes where narrowed as she looked at Pinkie

"Have you ever felt so left out just because you don't have something?" Pinkie asked, looking at her hooves

"Well, no... Just tell me what is on your mind" Twilight insisted in a friendly but annoying matter.

Pinkie sighed, "Twilight, I want to fly... I want real feathered wings, not the weird ones you made Rarity the day Rainbow Dash won the best young fliers competition" she whispered, her sad gaze traveling past Twilight to a group of young Pegasus ponies having fun.

Twilight saw the sadness in her friend's expression "Um... I-I don't know.... You know what, I will check my library, I just got a new box of books from Canterlot, there may be a spell in there" she neighed

Pinkie brightened up immedetly "Really Twilight? Oh thank you! Let's go!" she squealed and started bouncing in the direction of the library. Twilight Sparkle held back a chuckle and trotted after her, Spike in tow.

********************************

"HERE IT IS!" Pinkie dramaticly leaped out of a pile of books, holding up a ancient looking book. It was a dark pruple and had the title 'Transofromation Spells for Dummies' Pinkie chucked it at Twilight, who stopped it a inch from her face with a flash of purple magic from her horn. Her eyes swiped over each page quickly concentrateing, trying not to miss anything that had to do with pegasi.

"It looks like the hardest spell I have ever tried, I might not be able to do it..." she neighed uncertainly. She was met but the large, teary eyes of Pinkie "But I will try it"

"Yippie!" Pinkie squealed, bouncing onto a pile of books she closed her eyes, waiting for Twilight to cast the spell.

Twilight took a deep breath, she squeezed her eyes shut and pointed her horn at Pinkie, first only a few sparkes, than suddenly all of ponyville was drowned in a flash of white light that faded away almost instantly.

Pinkie blinked open her eyes, but squeeze them shut. She slowly turned her head to the side, feeling some weight, than opened her eyes. "IT WORKED!" she squealed, seeing pink feathered wings, and at the same exaggeration moment, a scream of terror was heard right outside the library.

Twilight looked at the book again, this time noticing that the spell warnings went onto the next page. She flipped the page, reading, her eyes grew wide as she relized what she did. "Aw Buck"

~Wild Wings

Comments

[SpeedyAstro]

Very good. But get an editor to fix up some of these problems, will you? There's a good darling!

[Brian Loves You]

I really like the idea of the story, you just really need to take a lot time to edit and proofread, and I mean A LOT(no offence though)

For the prologue, (in my opinion) I think it's a good idea to remove everything except paragraphs 1, 2, and 3, just to give like a backround of the story, and add everything that was removed to chapter 1.

Also, there are a lot of spelling mistakes and incorrect/missing grammar.
I suggest using spell check and grammar check.

That's all I could think of for now. If you disagree with my suggestions, I totally respect your opinion, and I can't wait to read more of this!

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[Wild & Lightning]

1070447
Thank you but we really don't know any editors, or very many other people here So do you have any reccomendations for one?

[SpeedyAstro]

1070603 I really don't know anybody that well except BronyWriter. He is currently editing my story (not the one I currently have right now on this website, but another one), so you can ask him, I guess.

[Inferno demon Dash]

Very impresive, other then the spelling and grammer errors I'm hoping to see how this will turn out, I like this, Pinkie and Rainbow are a very awesome cule in my eyes and I' hoping to see where this goes. I'll be watching, also breif hints of SORROW! Awesome (she's the dark half of Pinkie Pie and second in command of the Dark Elements, aso known as Disharmony)

[Rainbow Dash 72]

I think its amazing! or, at least the concept is. But it moves a tad to quick, her getting the wings, just like that *snaps fingers* aside from that...