PLAY MORE TF2 BUY MORE HATS gaghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i have been brainwashed by valve BUY MORE HATS POOTIS pootis spencer here HELP ME TAKE MY MONE LORD GABEN!!!!!!!

yer this twilight is a fucking moron or just power happy making people into pony without asking strike one using magic on people without asking strike 2 one more strike and i think killing this twilight is good idea

twilight really need to be punished for this shit DO NOT MAKE ANY THINKING/ANYONE INTO A PONY WITHOUT ITS KNOWLEDGE OR CONSENT! SECOND DO NOT USE MAGIC ON ANYTHING WITHOUT ITS KNOWLEDGE OR CONSENT. this is all twilight fault

fucking retard twilight if your plan is to make twilight the antagonist of this story you are doing well so far

Thank u

9794513
Big oof
but lets be honest twilight acts before she thinks. That's the plot of several episodes in the show like lesson zero.
if im wrong that oof to me than

9795780
agreed but if this is set after lesson zero then she should know better if not Celestia should come down on her like a ton of bricks

If you see somone named Big NiG3r posting mean comments on my stories thats my friend nate. i have already kicked his ass for it but knowing him he is going to do it again lol..... my friends are asses but there good asses

Great story so far, but there are a few things very wrong, atleast to me, one twilight would not just Lazer/magick the humans right out of the bat after she helped with their tank, and I Really don't think she would just knock out the humans after forcing one of them out and them justly defending themselves, and I don't think sunbutt would just come over then look at their memories like that, but hey it's your story, and please keep working on it, it's pretty good.

9998650
I get it twilight may act without thinking, but shes a alicorn and all, and she's talking with unknown species/creatures, and she just attacks them?

Why u cancel?

9998650
You have some good points bud, but yea it's my story. also i am still new to the whole 'Story' thing i just think it's fun to make them.

10025417
dident mean to do that sorry

It's pretty engaging and there is a lot of detail in here but I were to say one thing is double spacing between the paragraphs would have been much appreciated... Other than that me likey :)