The Pinkest Party

by Waxworks

Instigation

It was time for tea. Yes it was.

A sweet, saccharine break from the troubling rush of the day. A time when Fluttershy could stop and think about the hurrying, scurrying ponies that went to and fro about their constant, stressful work, and she could just spend time with somepony else who shared her love of calm introspection.

Pinkie Pie threw open the door without knocking. “Fluttershy! Have you heard?” She shouted, rushing over and skidding to a stop next to Fluttershy’s table. Fluttershy winced.

“I… don’t think so. What should I have heard?”

Pinkie leaned in and whispered as loud as she could. “Somepony is planning a surprise party… without me!”

“Oh… is it for you?”

Pinkie shook her head violently. “No! It’s for somepony else! I haven’t figured out who, but it’s going to be held tonight! At Sugarcube Corner!”

“Is that how you heard about it?”

“Yes!” she shouted. “They hired the Cakes to make all the sweets, and I heard about it, and I don’t know what they tried to keep secret, but I found out, and now I want to know who’s doing what, where the decorations are coming from, and most of all, who it’s for!” She paced in quick, small circles, yelling and fussing and whipping her wild mane around as she ranted.

“Not knowing a party must be weird for you.”

“It’s crazy! I’m Ponyville’s premier party pony. The popular pick for ponies picky about parties! I’m prestigious! Prepared! Politic! I’m perfect!” she screeched. “…when it comes to parties,” she amended.

“I don’t think they didn’t choose you as an insult, they might just want something small,” Fluttershy said.

“But they deserve something big! Everypony does! I need to find out more.”

“I don’t think that’s—” Fluttershy began, but Pinkie was already gone out the door, leaving her alone in her cottage with her tea.

Pinkie hunted about town for something that would tell her more about the ponies that were having the party. There wasn’t much to be found. The Cakes had their names, but no guest list. She hunted down the names and found a small cottage on the outskirts of town, and she barged in. She insisted she could make their party better, free of charge. They weren’t having it, unfortunately. They got mad, they yelled at her for barging in, and she was sent away without being allowed to explain herself further.

She went back. She slipped in windows, came down the chimney, appeared in their kitchen drawers when they went looking for cutlery, but the answer was always the same: “We just want a small party for the family.” Eventually, Pinkie had to admit defeat, and left a gift on the table.

She hoped they liked cupcakes with buttercream frosting.

The day of the party came and went. Pinkie was not invited. Neither was anypony else (she checked). They had their little event, and they got a nice cake. Pinkie even tried to deliver it herself, but they asked the Cakes to bring it themselves to avoid having too big of a bash. Pinkie was thwarted at every turn. When their party ended, and the family went to sleep, Pinkie was in a bush across the street, staring at the windows.

“How could they have such a tiny little party without any decorations? All they did was eat a cake! That’s not a party! Why would anypony call something a party that wasn’t a party? Do I have to tell them what a real party is?” She put a hoof to her chin and looked up at the sky. “Do I know what a real party is?”

She went home. The confusion brought upon her by the strange events of this odd party had brought into question her own beliefs when it came to parties. Was she wrong, or was it them? She wasn’t positive, and that scared her.

She checked a dictionary: Party: A social gathering of invited guests, typically involving eating, drinking, and entertainment. It sounded right. That was how she treated it, sending out invitations, bringing ponies together, having a good time. That was all correct. The three “I’s” of parties: Invite, ingest, instigate (fun).

She wasn’t wrong. They just didn’t follow the rules, so it wasn’t a party. Not really. Pinkie let herself flop onto her bed in relief. She relaxed and stared at the ceiling for a minute. All that worrying and fussing over a non-party, and she was a little frazzled. She needed something to take her mind off the non-party.

A party sounded good.

Pinkie rolled off her bed and hopped to her hooves. She jumped down her trap door into her party-planning room and pulled together some stationery for invitations. She scrawled out in quick crayon writing a brief introduction and invitation for everypony she wanted to come. For a calm-me-down party, her closest friends sounded like good choices, so she wrote an invite to the other elements of harmony (not Spike or Starlight, they weren’t invited), and put them in a bag. She put on her best party-invite hat and pranced out of Sugarcube Corner. She was feeling a lot better about herself and the situation. That hadn’t been a party, and it was nothing to fuss about. She knew was parties were, and that wasn’t one of them. That was right. Very right.

She first visited Rarity. Rarity was the closest, and the first stop on her trip around Ponyville until she had to go to the outskirts where Fluttershy, Applejack, and Twilight lived. Getting Rainbow Dash she’d need her helicycle. She would be last.

She pushed open the door to the boutique and stepped inside. Rarity was hard at work cleaning up the hem of a dress that Pinkie thought looked too stuffy to allow for much freedom of movement. She bounded up and put the invitation on the ponnequin’s croup.

“Hi, Rarity! I’m having a proper party to reassure myself that what that one family had wasn’t a party and was just a celebration. There’s a difference, you know. Anyway, to make myself feel better that they didn’t allow me to hold them a party, I’m holding an actual party at my place to help calm me down. You’ll come, won’t you?”

Rarity carefully finished what she was doing, ignoring Pinkie Pie messing with the dress. Pinkie stood there staring and waiting until Rarity stood up, tied off her work, and picked up the envelope. She pulled it open and read the inside, then frowned. “Oh, tomorrow? I don’t think I can come, darling. I have a previous engagement, and you know I’ve told you to give me advance notice of these things.”

Pinkie’s face fell. “But I need you there! It’s to make me feel better! I was so confused and scared!”

“I know, darling, but I just can’t make it. It’s too soon with not enough notice. You’ll just have to get the others to come. I really am sorry.”

Pinkie lowered her head. “Awwww, that’s okay. I’ll be fine.”

Rarity gave her a quick hug. “We can make time for tea and cakes the day after, okay?”

“Okay.”

Pinkie left the boutique and made her bouncing way to Fluttershy’s cottage. If Rarity couldn’t come, Fluttershy surely could. She never did anything except take care of all those animals. Surely she’d have time.

“Oh, I promised Harry I would help him trim his fur tomorrow night. I would love to come, and I’ll see if I can reschedule, but Angel’s made me put it off for a few days now, and I can’t keep doing it. Could you reschedule your party, maybe? You said Rarity couldn’t come either, right?”

Pinkie left without a second guest at her party. Her smile was a little more subdued, but she bounded down to Sweet Apple Acres with hope still in her heart.

“Sorry, Sugarcube, ah let Big Mac go off to visit Sugar Belle in exchange for him doing my part of the orchard today, and ah’d do his tomorrow. If ah finish in time ah can come, but ah can’t promise you anythin’. Can you reschedule, maybe? Ah’d be able to guarantee time off in a couple days more.”

“That’s what everypony else keeps asking!” Pinkie protested.

“Then maybe you should. It’d give us all more time to prepare.”

“Nnnnnnngh!” Pinkie left the invitation with Applejack and stormed off toward Twilight’s castle. The fact that none of them were willing to come was beginning to get to her. She needed it soon, and she gave them a whole day to get ready. Why weren’t they willing to come? A whole day was more than enough time.

She knocked on the giant double doors to Twilight’s castle and waited for Spike to come answer. She’d have to tell Twilight Spike wasn’t allowed to come, but that was okay. It was Starlight that was going to be the problem.

The doors opened and Spike’s face appeared. “Hello, Pinkie! What’s up?”

“Is Twilight in?” Pinkie asked, waving the invitation impatiently.

“Yeah, she’s at the Cutie Map.”

“Great!” Pinkie didn’t wait for a response. She stepped over him and bounded down the hallway to the Map room. Twilight was there looking over the extended sections of the map, head down at the edge of the table.

“Twilight!” Pinkie yelled. Twilight jumped.

“Pinkie Pie! What are you doing here?”

“I’m here to deliver you an invitation to a super-special make-Pinkie-feel-better-about-not-parties party!”

“A what?”

“It’s a party to make up for one that ordered a cake for a party that wasn’t a party.”

“I’m not sure I understand.”

“It’s tomorrow!”

“Tomorrow night?”

“Yes!”

“I don’t know if I can come tomorrow night. I have to help fix the gymnasium after some of the yak students got a little rowdy with it. The workers are coming tomorrow after school, and I need to be there.”

Pinkie’s mane wilted. This would only leave Rainbow Dash, and now that she was part of the Wonderbolts, Pinkie’s mind was filled with thoughts of “practice”, that Rainbow Dash would have to be doing all day.

“Oh…I guess so.”

“Can you reschedule it?”

Pinkie’s eye twitched. She looked at Twilight, seeing her, but gazing through her at nothing. Her eyes focused on the wall behind Twilight.

“Pinkie?”

“Yes. Yes I can. I should visit Rainbow Dash and ask here when might be a good time to come for the party. That way, everypony will be on the same page, and there will be no miscommunication, and everypony will be at my party.”

Twilight tilted her head. “That’s… good, but are you okay?”

“Yes, Twilight. I am fine.” Pinkie turned away and marched out of the castle.

Pinkie didn’t even bother pulling out her helicycle to visit Rainbow Dash. Everypony else had already turned her down, so she wasn’t going to hold a party for Rainbow alone. Those were birthday parties. Everypony had one of those, and even they involved more ponies attending than her current party was shaping up to have. She stormed home, stormed up the stairs, stormed over to her bed, and slammed her face into the blankets. Gummy blinked at her.

“No, Gummy. It did not go well. Everypony’s busy,” she said.

Gummy blinked again.

“They all wanted me to reschedule.”

Gummy blinked his left eye, then the right.

“Yes, I guess I can, but I still hate it. A day’s enough time, right?”

Gummy didn’t blink.

“No? You think so, too?” She lifted her head from the blankets and looked at him. “Really? But why? I think that should have been enough, and then they can just come when they’re done work. I mean, it’s not like they don’t finish work when it gets dark, and then they could have come over.”

Gummy blinked twice quickly.

“Hmmm, I see your point. So I should make it a better party?”

Gummy stared at her. Pinkie smiled.

“The best party?”

Gummy stared harder.

“A party so good they’ll stay until it’s done?” Pinkie shouted excitedly.

Gummy blinked slowly. Pinkie was vibrating with excitement.

“That’s a great idea, Gummy! A party so good they’ll arrive at the beginning, and stay until I decide it ends! With enough time to get ready for it, they’re sure to stay! A lot of advance notice! You’re a genius, Gummy!” She dashed over and hugged him tight. He just blinked. Pinkie pranced around the room, then disappeared down into the Party Cave. Gummy was left alone.