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Prologue - Every Morning3,573 words
Chapter 1 - Lessons and Trials4,382 words
Chapter 2 - Distilled Chaos4,086 words
Chapter 3 - Advisory4,359 words
Chapter 4 - Immoral Lows3,281 words

Prologue - Every Morning

Immortals: Book 1 - Immortal High

Prologue

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

Celestia moaned and shifted in her bed. The darned thing was loud. She brought her pink frilly sheets over her head and tucked it under her muzzle. She was not in the mood for any physical activity at all today. She should have been getting up for school, but she decided against it. I’ll just wait until Luna wakes me up, she thought, maybe she’ll bash my head with that lamp again; it was pretty fun the last time. A thought had passed her mind of telling Luna she was a masochist, but she thought better of it. I’ve tortured her enough for the week, she thought with a chuckle.

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

That beeping was getting annoying. She should have gone to sleep earlier yesterday so waking up wouldn’t be such a pain, but no she just had to stay up until three in the morning. Celestia rolled over and let her eyes adjust to the brightness of the morning. She smiled. It was definitely worth it though. Last night was fun.

ALFALFA ALFALFA ALFALFA ALFALFA ALFALFA

Wait… that wasn’t right. Celestia poked her head above the sheets to get a look at her alarm clock. Her eyes adjusted to the sudden change of depth and with it came a clear vision of a small green letter “T” with a digital display spelling out “SCREW YOU” in a LED letters.

“What the hell?” Celestia managed to blurt out whilst staring at the strange new item in her room.

“Good morning, Tia!” A sultry, taunting voice yelled beside Celestia. She screamed and nearly jumped out of her bed. She caught sight of the serpent-like creature floating upside-down with mismatched appendages smiling, in a mocking manner, arms crossed.

“Discord?! What the fuck, man?” the white, pink maned alicorn squealed in complete shock.

“Hahaha! The look on your face right now is priceless! I think I really am getting good at this ‘god of chaos’ thing.” Discord stepped down to his usual bi-ped demeanor. “Like what I did with your boring old clock?” Discord chided with half-closed eye lids. He enjoyed Tia’s frazzled hair and frantic mannerisms that contradicted her usual calm and collected personality.

“No I do not!” Tia yelled in frustration. “You scared the living shit outta me!”

“Language, Celestia, honestly,” Discord tsked as he wagged his finger-talon-thing. “That’s no way for a princess to speak!”

Tia had to hold back a smile as she turned away from Discord. “Up yours,” she retorted whilst trying to shake the tired out of her. Today is going to be a LONG day, she thought with a sigh. She was startled out of her thoughts with three loud thuds on her door. Discord glanced towards it, mildly interested.

“Tia, you okay? What was that racket?” Luna yelled from behind the door before opening it to investigate. She was presented with the questionable image of her sister with a frazzled mane and wide-eyed expression with a smug god of chaos floating next to her bed.

“D-Discord? Did you… sleep here?” Luna asked with a twisted face of horror, realizing what she might’ve come across. Discord found this hilarious and started laughing hysterically, practically in stitches. Tia, however, was not amused and stumbled out with a blush.

“NO. What’s wrong with you, ya sicko?”

“Look who’s calling who a sicko,” Luna chided, particularly relieved at her reaction. She instantly started regretting at what she had implied. Cue the awkwardness… Luna thought as she shuffled her hooves. She decided to change the subject before an awkward silence took hold. Well, it would have been silent if it wasn’t for Discord’s laughter. “We have to get to school, Tia. I don’t want to be late.”

“Wait, whaddya mean we?” Tia asked quizzically as she finally got out of her bed, trying to untangle herself from her sheets. Discord had finally stifled his laugh to a small comedic wheeze. “I’M the one that goes to high school, little Luna.”

“Not anymore Tia,” Luna sighed.

Has she honestly forgotten already?

“I’m a freshpony this year, remember?” It saddened Luna to see that her dear sister didn’t care for her life other than their interactions together.

Celestia instantly lit up and squeezed her hooves together to squish her face in a comedic puff. “Oh yeah, that’s right! We finally get to go to school together again!” Celestia’s thoughts turned to their time as grade schoolers, always hanging out at lunch together. It was a real shame when Celestia and Discord entered middle school; they got separate lunch/recess periods. Luna handled it well, but Tia was distraught. Those were good times.

Luna had to hold back a smile, trying to force it down with thoughts of her sister’s selfishness. “Yeah, whatever.”

“So, little Luna goes to high school this year?” Discord mused while edging towards the midnight blue alicorn. “Don’t worry, it’s not as bad as Tia says it is. It’s much worse.”

“Well my point is that it’s pretty shit!” Tia laughed while slapping Luna on the back. Luna sighed. She really hoped that they were joking.

Tia had always told Luna horrific stories of her high school experiences, but always in a light hearted tone. “Well, today I got the crap beat out of me and almost got raped by this really big guy!” She would say, her mouth still full of the pie she was eating, that stupid grin on her face. “But luckily I screamed loud enough and the coach saved me. He started blackmailing me, though, saying I should have some way of paying him back. Hahaha!” She would put her arm around Luna in an almost drunken stupor, laughing loudly. Luna would chuckle uneasily and try to scoot away from her loud sister. She could never tell if Tia was making up her stories, or telling the truth. She wasn’t drunk (usually) but she sure acted like it.

“Don’t worry, little Luna, we’ll protect you,” Discord said mockingly. Luna couldn’t tell if he really was mocking her or if he was being serious. Saying the god of Chaos was unreadable is a laughable understatement.

“Hey Discord,” Celestia said taking a step forward. “Lay off the ‘little Luna’ nickname, she’ll get teased.” Luna looked up at her sister, surprised to hear her somber tone, but not so at the stupid grin she wore. Luna’s nickname was fitting; she was a good foot shorter than Tia. Despite the two year age difference, Luna was still considerably small for her age, much smaller than Tia was at her age. Luna could actually pass for a filly, if it wasn’t for her baritone voice.

“C’mon Tia, you know I don’t mind that little nickname,” Luna said, not catching her pun. “In fact, it has grown on me.”

“I know, I know… but high schoolers can be vicious…”

“Celestia’s right, Luna. You don’t want to give them a chance.” Discord added while putting an arm over Celestia. “Though I have to say, it will be difficult when Tia’s your sister.”

“That’s ri- Wait! Just what does that mean?” Celestia extended her hoof to slap Discord with feign anger.

Before Celestia could hit him, Discord slithered into the air in an act of self-defense and agility. “Well come on Tia, just look at your face! I’m having a hard time not punching you right now.”

“Why you little-“ Celestia sputtered, reaching up to snatch Discord’s serpent-like figure out of the air, missing horribly.

Luna rolled her eyes. “Come on guys; get a room.”

Before Tia could reply, Discord interjected, “Wouldn’t this be the room in question?”

Luna eyed her environment, dumbstruck. Celestia snickered with a hoof to her mouth.

“Oh, right…”

Luna left the room remembering that she had a School to go to as well. After she was gone, Celestia and Discord remained quiet.

After a while she started to eye him. “Well go on then!”

Discord was busy with his thoughts, that smug smile plastered on his face. Tia’s outburst snapped him out of his reverie. “Huh, what?”

“I need to get dressed for school.”

“…And?” Discord asked, puzzled.

“I won’t let you just watch me.”

“…Why not? You’re not normally clothed, Tia.” Discord deadpanned.

“Well, yeah… but it’s a little creepy if you just… stare at me.”

Discord rolled his eyes and headed for the window. “Sure.” Whipping his body back and forth to get air, he rocketed out the window. He did a backflip in order to close the window, and then kicked off the wall to propel himself even faster towards his house.

Celestia watched with half-closed lids as she muttered, “Show-off.”

“OKAY KIDS, TIME TO GO TO SCHOOL.” Josephner (Ya-sef-ner) yelled in his royal Canterlot voice.

“Dad, you’re doing that thing with your voice again.” Luna groaned as she slung her backpack across her spine. “Plus we’re already leaving.”

“Oh. Whoops, sorry.” Josephner apologized as he rubbed the back of his mane. His reading glasses were balanced on the tip of his snout, with a newspaper in his hooves and a cup of coffee floating next to his head. He was a brilliant stallion; the only fully grown horse in all of Equestria. His elegant silver ephemeral mane was complimented by his pitch black coat, his neon green iris seemingly glowing in soft, caring eyes. He was over 1,839 years old, his era being one of the most peaceful in history, along with his co-ruler, the beautiful, and spastic Chaos. Chaos was… well, chaotic. And she was a griffon. Her chaos mixed with Josephner’s forgiving and kind demeanor allowed them to be incredibly effective and a great judge of character; always just, but never cruel. “Luna, have a great first day of school.”

“Thanks dad!” Luna replied, the rare, genuine smile spreading across her face.

Celestia entered the room, heading towards the front door along with her sister.

“Celestia.” Josephner called, causing the white pony to cease. Josephner lowered his reading glasses and said through a warm smile, “Stay out of trouble.”

Celestia smiled and replied as if it were a challenge. “I’ll try. No promises.”

After sharing a laugh the two ponies left the quiet house to the even quieter streets of McLavender drive. Josephner had the option of living in the castle as all the other monarchs have, but instead chose the quiet streets of the average suburbs. He had claimed that the silent neighborhood would be a more suitable environment for him, his wife Marlabel, and his two kids to live. He couldn’t have been more right; it worked wonders for stress.

If only Marlabel had lived seen her two children grow up to be their flawed, but wonderful ponies they are today.

As the sisters trotted down their driveway, Celestia decided to voice some of her thoughts to Luna, whom was deathly silent. “Man, Dad is weird.”

Luna nearly tripped, the rude comment catching her of guard. She recoiled in rising anger, but before she could comment, Celestia elaborated.

“I mean he’s not like ‘creeper’ weird, I meant the effect he has on ponies.”

Luna stared at her sister, slowing down to a walk. She honestly didn’t know what to think. Was she leading into a compliment or criticism?

“Seriously, he’s like a complete push-over. Yet he’s so nice, and so forgiving, you feel terrible when he shrugs off major delinquencies completely, not even sounding disappointed.”

Oh. She was doing that thing again. Celestia would sometimes get really depressed, and then when it looked like she was going to become suicidal, she would make this very intellectual observation on life and go back to her old self. This cycle last anywhere between five seconds, to over a month.

“It makes you feel like shit, and leads you into changing yourself so you don’t make the same mistake again.”

Luna blinked through wide eyes. She was right. Dad must’ve been the nicest pony on earth; he could be a pushover at times. In fact, Luna couldn’t remember if he had ever taken disciplinary action towards either of the two. “Yeah… Dad’s really cool like that. But what brought this up all of the sudden?”

“Well I was thinking and found myself surprised at actually how much I loved him.” Celestia looked at the ground, then at the sky. For a moment, her face fell in what might have been days. “I really love you both. And Discord.”

Luna found herself having a look of sympathy for her sister. She knew Tia loved her family dearly, but she hardly ever spoke it. It must be horrible to think that your family believes you don’t appreciate them. But what caught Luna off guard was saying she loved Discord. She said it not in physical attraction, but in a way that made her believe Discord was part of the family. Perhaps he was. The three were friends ever since the first grade.

“Tia… don’t beat yourself up.”

Celestia instantly lightened up at her sister’s interjection immediately, as if the world had been lifted off her shoulders. “Nah, don’t worry. If I ever did it would be for the fun of it!”

Luna rolled her eyes with a faint smile. At least she’s back to normal. However normal that may be.

“Aw, did I miss sad-sack Tia?” Discord mocked as he stepped up next to Celestia. “What philosophy did you spew up this time?”

Luna shot Discord an angry gaze, but Celestia put her arm around Discord’s neck, squeezing him against her chest. “Oh you know, I was just suggesting we kill you before your more trouble than your worth.”

“And how much trouble am I worth, exactly?” Discord chided smugly, playing along.

“About a genocide or two. Be careful though; you’re losing points fast.”

The two immortals burst out in a healthy laughter. Luna rolled her eyes for what have might’ve been the umpteenth time by then.

She couldn’t say she was particularly thrilled going to school with her sister and Discord, but hanging out with them made her feel inexplicably happy. Guess that’s the way family makes you feel sometimes…

Luna’s thoughts were interrupted by the force of a certain pure white Alicorn slamming in her face. “Aw, what the-“ she was interrupted (once again) by the force of the ground hitting her haunches.

“Luna we’re here.” Celestia apologized as she helped her little Luna up. “We take the bus, ‘member?”

Luna chuckled nervously. “Oh, right.”

The three waited for the bus on that soon-to-be familiar bench, Discord sitting in a very curious manner, Celestia joking as she reached out her arms around her two friends, and Luna sitting quietly in a dog-like position because of her size. This is going to be one hell of a High school year.

Chaos shifted in her seat, the stress of the day building up. She became more and more restless by the absolute idiocy that was in her talons right now. “’Bill 101: The Right To Fart In Public’? ‘Bill 329: Homes For The Lazy’? ‘Bill 230: Cutie Mark Class For Those Unfortunate Enough To Not Get Them Before The Fifth Grade’?”

She took one last look of the stupid inconveniences that could’ve been remedied via simple problem solving. Instead, they came to the Queen to help. “Seriously, it’s like me and Josephner are the last two living creatures with a brain!” She threw all of the ridiculous bills and propositions on the desk in front of her. “This is a job for Josephner. I solve practical problems, damn it!”

Chaos rubbed her temples with her talons, realizing how useless the attempt was. If only Josephner was here, I could coax him into giving me a backrub or something. Hooves feel heavenly compared to this crap.

She looked at her talons and cursed at them. “Useless pose-able thumbs, I wouldn’t need you if I were just a unicorn.”

Chaos slammed her head against her desk and muttered something under her breath.

“Fucking stupid-ass ponies.”

“Ahem.”

The griffon raised her head and found herself looking at a pitch black horse with those out-standing features, looking down on her with a sideways frown. “Oh. OH! Oh h-hey Josephne… Josephner…” Chaos smiled nervously and started backing away at the authority figure, nearly tipping the chair backwards. “Wait a second- Why am I scared of you?”

“Good question.” Josephner said, his former frown slipping into an innocent smirk. “Come on now, let me get to work.”

Chaos got up aggressively enough to scoot the chair she was sitting in backwards a little, providing enough room for her co-ruler to sit after her. “I don’t know how you put up with all of this bullshit.”

“I enjoy it,” The black alicorn deadpanned. “Now go do something you enjoy.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice.” The job could be boring if you don’t have someone doing the grunt work. Luckily for Chaos, Josephner enjoyed solving the people’s problems. Chaos enjoyed the large-scale stuff, such as attending massive court sessions, or making trading deals with other nations. It was how she could create the most controlled, harmless chaos without killing anybody or pissing off her subjects. That’s how she found husband after all.

Before leaving, Chaos turned her head and faced Josephner, staring at his calm expression before mustering up the courage to ask him that question that has been bugging her for quite some time. “Josephner?”

Yes, Chaoita?”

Chaos cringed a little from her full name, but continued to speak. “Did you ever wish that… you could’ve died along with your wife?”

The severity of the abrupt question caused the calm horse to look up from his work. He stared at her with those soft, sympathetic eyes, trying to find his answer.

“Hmm… Why yes, I think I have,” The alicorn looked blankly down at his desk. “But… that’s not a good mindset to be in. I admit I have thought it at a time, but I had to remember that she would have wanted me to be unaffected by it. And that I have ponies to care for. Not just my daughters but my nation too.” Josephner looked back up at Chaos, whose gaze drifted elsewhere. “Why?”

“Just… wondering.” Chaos turned to leave once more, but Jospehner halted her.

“Disner was strong, Chaos. You should reflect that. I’m here for you.” Josephner smiled. “Also, it’s not a wrong thing to think, it’s just… unadviseable.” Josephner got up from his desk and started to walk towards the seemingly troubled griffon. “It’s the unfortunate side effect of being an immortal. We all shall out live our friends, our loves, possibly our family.” He put a hoof on her shoulder as gently as he could. “But we must be strong. We all grieve the dead, but sooner than later we must move on.”

Chaos felt herself lighten up and smiled back at the alicorn. He turned back to his desk to continue his work. Chaos felt as if it were necessary to ask him another question. “Would you consider remarrying?” She asked, her taunting voice mirroring that of her son’s.

Josephner nearly fell over his own hooves, his knees instantly becoming weak. Barely having the ability to catch himself from falling to the floor, he tried his best to make it appear he didn’t lose his composure. Josephner was handsome, that was something Chaos didn’t deny. She was kind of into the whole inter-species romance, her 'first time' being with a deer, and her husband being a buffalo. It was a fetish she embraced fully. But she herself didn't know her own feelings for the stallion. Neither did she know how Josephner felt; he was very… unreadable, this stupid look of joy and caring never leaving his face. Not one who was particularly skilled at showing her emotions she decided to mask her uncertainties with teasing the alicorn. Not only did it seem like she was flirting with the stallion just for the laughs and not for her actual attraction to him, but it was also pretty damned hilarious.

“W-why would y-you ask that?” Josephner tried to say casually through a cracking voice, horribly failing.

Chaos stifled a chuckle; as she left she sang, “Just curious!”

Luna. That was it. She had lost her last friend. The last one she truly cared about. Celestia entered her room, closed the door, and stood. For what seemed like decades, she stood. She stood until her legs gave out. She hit the ground with a thud. She tightened her legs until she couldn’t anymore. It looked as if she was hugging herself. It was starting to actually chafe, her grip shredding her own skin. As if she believed she could squeeze the existence she lived in to oblivion. To kill her history. Maybe reconstruct it to absolutely suck a little less. She couldn’t be strong anymore.

She cried.

She sobbed.

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