Brutal Reminder
Her green and gold eyes slowly opened as she began to take in the world around her. The sun wasn't shining in her window as it normally would though... That was rather odd, since rain had not been scheduled that day.
A pale green aura surrounded the black, rectangular glasses that lay on the nightstand beside her bed, lifting from their place as the brown coat mare began to rise from the comfort of her thick bedding. After placing her glasses on the bridge of her nose with an ease that came from doing this for years, Briar looked to the large window that granted her the view of the busy streets in Manehattan. Her mind still foggy from slumber, it took her a moment to register what she was looking at. The unicorn’s brow furrowed as she remained in her bed, not entirely sure how she should react. Just a day before the Summer Sun celebration and the sky was currently home to both the sun and the moon.
The first Summer Sun celebration with Princess Luna home - the festival was created to honour Nightmare Moon's banishment after all. Was it possible that the royal sisters did this as a statement of harmony? Showing the pony folk that they are united in their rule and are simply happy to be together once again?
The same pale green aura from earlier moved the curtains from her window, giving her a better view as she then levitated her sketchbook to her. Briar took a more comfortable position on her bed as she opened to a blank sheet in her book, keeping her eyes fixated on the sun and moon. She would look down on occasion to see where she was sketching, but she seemed so enamored with the sight she was currently presented with.
As the pencil worked on the page a clear form began to take shape; a baseline pony shape with a gown on it. The gown appeared to be regal; intended for formal occasions or something a fantasy princess would wear. As she began to swap out her pencil for colour she continued to work on her piece. Faint purples, rich golds, iridescent whites and shimmering blues decorated the once blank page as she commanded the illustration implements to her will.
Art was her escape; her get away. It offered so many things for so many ponies. Everypony could look at the same piece of art, listen to the same song or even wear the same dress and get a different feeling, sense of purpose or emotion from it. Some could see the joy in the bright colours while others saw it as a mask. Ponies comment on the message and the meaning in the lyrics while some would claim the rhythm held the true passion. No matter what you look at, no pony would ever see the same thing you do.
Briar Heart learned this the hard way growing up. She was gifted with a rather… interesting cutie mark. In a world where your life's purpose was literally printed on your flank, it was often a fear that a young filly or colt would not like what they got, or maybe they wouldn’t know what it meant. The latter was what happened in Briar’s case; a blue glass heart surrounded by intricate vines covered in thorns. Often getting one's cutie mark was the best day of their life - discovering what you were good at, something that made you happy, and being told your destiny in one moment of joy. The moment she gained her mark was far from the best memory she held. Briar could still feel the pain in her heart as she briefly recalled the experience. How she had never felt so small before in her life, and how she knew that moment was going to change her forever.
She would hear whispers from other ponies at school; What does it mean? What job is that for? Maybe it means she pretends to be nice, but is really mean? Lures ponies in with fake kindness just to hurt them…
Rumors would spread and eventually everypony would avoid the brown filly. She was an outcast. An oddity among her peers. She was such a dull colour with no real interesting traits… And when her interesting trait came, it only alienated her more.
A sudden knock at her door pulled her from these depressing memories and quickly grabbed her attention.
“Briar! Are you awake yet? We are falling behind on work! You can’t sleep the day away, m’kay?” a familiar voice called from the other side. “Sorry Suri! I’ll be out in a moment!” Briar called back to her roommate. Suri Polomare was an old classmate of hers. The two mares grew up in Ponyville but it wasn’t long until aspirations pulled them from their hometown. Both showed an interest in fashion and design and followed their passions to Manehattan to learn, study and pursue and career in the textile arts. As they moved forward with their lives they soon grew apart as many do. But one day Briar had noticed an ad in the paper looking for an assistant. Suri had began to grow her own business and gain a reputation in Manehattan as she entered contests and more to showcase her works. As such, she had started to fall behind on the flood of orders coming in and was in need off a second pair of hooves. This came as a blessing to Briar; though she had the passion and drive to create she simply couldn’t translate her designs to fabric. She knew the basics and could put garments together but they never looked anything like the concept. In exchange for teaching, and a place to stay, Briar offered to help Suri with her workload. Hemming, embroidering, cutting, gathering and other basics were simple enough on their own. Briar could work through them quickly and keep Suri on time with her tasks and deadlines. They had finally gotten to a point where she could enter competitions again!
Though Briar was happy that she had helped and that Suri was finally back on her feet, she felt a small twinge of concern. She had yet to receive the tutoring and mentoring that was originally promised to her. Briar worked late nights while Suri slept, moved through mountains of loose end projects while Suri met with clients, and even went above and beyond to keep the light pink mare’s workshop clean and organized. Suri had to be busy and simply didn’t have time to help Briar with her lacking skill set… That’s what Briar kept telling herself, anyway. She tried to be patient and wait, but a small voice in the back of her mind told her to talk to Suri about it. As time went on, she began to fear that Suri had forgotten her promise.
She levitated her sketchbook and pencil case as she finally rose from her bed and left her room. Briar made her way down the stairs, slowing as she laid eyes on the pink earth pony moving about her workshop. She watched as Suri began to put pieces of the garments Briar had been working on the night before on dress forms - stepping back and admiring the work. With tomorrow’s celebration she was surely worried the ordered designs wouldn’t be ready in time, and with the sun and moon the way they current were it was a little hard to tell what time of day it was.
It was true the two mares grew up in the same town and attended the same school, but Briar couldn’t really say they had ever been friends. Briar was cautious about making friends due to her past experiences so the idea of bluntly asking Suri to be her friend was out of the question, and the pink mare never really took an interest in her. It wasn’t until they both left for Manehattan that they really had any interaction outside of school. In the few months she had lived with Suri, Briar had quickly noticed that the earth pony had a rather short temper when she was under a lot of stress - which was often. Briar did her best to avoid conflict so she was often called boring and quiet. These comments bothered her, but she didn’t say anything; merely giving an awkward laugh when it came up.
She saw Suri struggling with a bolt of fabric which caused her to find the motivation to continue down the stairs. A familiar green surrounded the burgundy bolt as Briar levitated it and began to walk it over to the dressforms; her sketchbook landing neatly on the table. Being a unicorn often meant that she was able to gather tools and work faster than Suri; a gift that frequently came as a benefit to the mares in their work.
“Where do you want the bolt, Suri?” the timid brown mare asked as she continued towards the dressforms, keeping her gaze to Suri as she awaited an answer.
“Just on the cutting table next to them. I want to compare accent colours before the client picks it up, m’kay?”
Briar’s brow furrowed… She was cutting it rather close to the deadline. Why would she attempt to make any changes at this point? The cream and mahogany colour scheme with gold trim currently in place was fine. But, she kept her mouth shut. She was here to help, not to give advice.
As Briar looked to the dress form, something struck her as odd. She turned her head to the side as her pace slowed, stopping right before the gown on display. She felt a pang in her heart as she realized what was wrong. Briar had worked on this, yes, but she didn’t work on it in a completed scale. She was only privy to small pieces of it at a time as she hemmed, sewn on beads and other small details. Though the colours were different than the ones she originally picked, there was no doubt in her mind that this was a design from her sketchbook.
“Umm.. Suri…” Briar began as she looked over to the pink mare who was elbow deep in a rhinestone box.
“What is it, Briar?”
She slowly let the bolt of fabric down on the table as she was asked while she tried to gather the courage to address Suri about this plagiarism. “Did you…? Is this my design…?” she managed, her voice feeling dry from the panic she was trying to ignore. Suri looked up from her box and glanced back over to Briar and the dress. She gave an awkward smile and laugh while placing a hoof over her heart. “Oh, I must have forgotten to mention that. The client saw your design and demanded it, m’kay?”
Her heart wavered as she tried to process her reaction to this statement. How did the client get her sketchbook? Briar rarely left it lying around, embarrassed by her illustrations. She didn’t think the client would go about snooping around the apartment either. There were holes in Suri’s story and it didn’t sit right with her. But… She held her tongue.
“Well... If the client liked it… I am happy she gets to take it home…” Briar replied with a barely contained, sorrowful tone. She looked to the side and placed her right hoof over her left, seemingly fidgeting with something that was not there.
“Besides,” Suri began, causing Briar to look back up to her. Suri looked to her as she turned to face her, holding some golden beads in an upturned hoof. “Those designs are wasting away in that little book of yours. You should really be thanking me, m’kay?” she said with a smug chuckle. That made Briar’s stomach turn. The audacity of Suri was frustrating and outright insulting. But… What could she do? The dress was made and with her help… The client would be here any moment to gather it. She had worked on it this whole time and never noticed - it must have been like giving Suri silent permission. Not to mention that fighting Suri on this would likely strain their already less than ideal work relationship… She reminded herself that it was often just best to remain quiet and let things go; to choose her battles. Suri had promised to help her better her craft which is something she still needed. Not to mention Briar was living in her studio apartment still. Pissing her off might just end up with Briar being homeless.
You’re weak… Can’t even stand up for yourself.. She is using you and abused your trust… A small voice sounded in the back of her mind. The brown mares head hung low as she felt the silent self defeating words echo.
Soon, a knock caused both ponies to focus on the main door. Suri sighed, muttering that she was expecting the client a little later than this, but still trotted to answer the door. Briar froze. She was a swell of emotions at the moment and she honestly didn’t think that she could handle seeing the client; not after discovering that she would be wearing her design without her permission. She moved quickly towards the stairs once more and headed back up them to the safety of her room, remembering to take her sketchbook.
She paused at the threshold of her room as her ears moved back; listening to the sound of Suri and the client as they moved about the workshop. A small part of her was flattered and awe struck that the client ‘demanded’ her design. Though Briar was so upset about the whole situation, she still wanted to know what the client had to say about the completed product.
She moved back to the railing and laid down on her stomach; Briar kept low as she looked over the edge and watched as Suri brought the pale pink mare into the workspace. She moved her sketchbook to rest next to her as she flipped through the pages slowly. She landed on the page that contained the original design; looking to the earthy and vibrant greens that it had originally been sketched in. She recalled sitting in Central Park during her first week in Manehattan. Her green and gold eyes drifted to the words she had written next to the design as she thought back to the fond memories; ‘Wrapped in serene velvets that the garden has to offer; soft and temperate as the beauty that inspired them. Touches of rose gold to capture the flowers that decorate this landscape and complement the wearer. ’
Her ears twitched as she heard something odd. Though the words were read mentally and not out loud, she could have sworn she did hear them in the room. Briar’s eyes quickly darted down to the mares that were still unaware of her presence. She saw the client was already in the gown at this point and Suri was tending to small fittings as she spoke the words Briar had written on her sheet. Her eyes widened as she felt anger begin to boil inside her.
The client gave a chuckle as Suri spoke, saying that she was glad she didn’t go with the drab greens that her original sketch had. Suri had lied to her… Suri had lied to Briar when she said that the client simply saw the design in the sketchbook. She neglected to mention that Suri was the one who showed it to her.
She bit her bottom lip, looking to her hooves as Suri and the client talked a little bit more. Briar was hurt and betrayed. She wanted to yell - she wanted to scream. She longed to give Suri a piece of her mind without a care for the aftermath, but a small voice inside her told her to not overreact. She should talk to Suri about this calmly, ask if there was a reason she lied. Surely she had a good reason, right?
She waited out of sight, taking deep breaths. Briar needed to remain calm… She couldn’t let her hurt feelings get the better of her… She needed to enter this with a level head and not jump right to accusations.
She heard the client begin to leave; presumably happy with the gown she had paid for. Briar stood and slowly began down the stairs once more as Suri closed the main door. She took another deep, calming breath.
“Suri… Can I speak to you for a moment?” Briar asked in a soft tone. The light pink mare gave a sigh as she turned to face the somber unicorn. “What is it now, Briar? We still have work today. We have another client coming later toda-”
“And is she picking up another one of my dresses?” Briar said quickly with a firm tone. Suri’s ears went back in response to the sudden tonal shift. She looked down her snout at Briar, taking a sense of superiority.
The unicorn’s brow furrowed to this reaction; it basically told her that the answer to her question was ‘Yes’.
“How many of my designs have you taken without my permission?”
“If you really cared, you would have noticed, no?” the earth mare replied with venom. Briar was taken back by this sudden change in her roommate's demeanour, no longer trying to sugar coat or hide what she had done.
“Do you not understand why I am so bothered by this?” Briar asked, failing to hide a quiver in her voice as she spoke. She tried to keep a strong front while confronting Suri, but she felt herself breaking; fear of rejection and confrontation crept in the back of her pessimistic mind. She wanted to voice her troubles and why she felt as wronged as she did, but it was quickly becoming clear that Suri simply did not care. Briar still hoped that Suri would realize how much this affected her and hopefully apologize, or at least promise not to do it again. She didn’t want to assume the worse in ponies, but the small voice that haunted her inner thoughts told her to simply give up like she always did. Just lay your anger down and turn a blind eye. Was this issue really worth angering Suri? Was it worth the gap it would place in their work relationship?
“Oh - such a small town pony still. It seems you still haven’t learned how to make it in Manehattan,” Suri jested, giving a small giggle as Briar’s head had lowered during her wavering thoughts. The brown mare gritted her teeth as she felt the fire boil in her again. “I trusted you... “ she said softly, almost a whisper.
Briar quickly looked up with a livid expression on her features. “You honestly think that taking another's ideas and personal work and claiming it as your own is what will get you ahead in this industry?” she spat. Briar had finally reached her breaking point. “I have done so much for you; helped you out so much. I have not taken any credit and simply did all that I as asked and more. I worked so hard for you and you didn’t even keep your promises! Not only did you take my physical labour for granted but you also went behind my back and stole my ideas!”
Briar reared back and slammed her hooves onto the tiled floor. “We both grew up in the same town; taught the same things in school and yet you turned out so… so…!” Briar tried to hold back the venom she had bubbling in the back of her throat. She wanted nothing more at this point then to make Suri feel as small and pathetic as she made her feel, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it.
She disliked confrontation like this; arguing in the heat of the moment. She often got lost and jumbled, losing sight of what she wanted to say and how to convey how she felt. Briar felt like a filly trying to offer opinions on a topic she did not understand, underprepared and under equipped to provide meaningful dialogue. She lacked the confidence to stand up for what she believed in and lost her fire too easily. The smallest bump, being interrupted, or not having a comeback quick enough left her defeated and discouraged.
The unicorn still feared what Suri would think of her and how this whole thing would eventually play out. She still held onto the fleeting hope that Suri would understand her feelings and make amends.
“Look… If you can’t handle big city life then just crawl back to Ponyville, m’kay? I don’t need to put up with this. There’s a million no talent, naive ponies like you looking for a place to belong around here.”
Her eyes widened. Briar knew this would happen even though she tried to deny it. She couldn’t really have thought that this would end in any positive way. Briar didn’t know why, but she felt a smile form onto her lips, She looked back up to Suri with tears beginning to well in her emerald and gold eyes.
“Thank you for this experience…”
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Her heart was heavy as she waited at the station the next day. Briar didn’t take much with her when she left for Manehattan and she didn’t really buy much during her time there. She sat next to the pale blue luggage bag that laid next to her as she looked to her hooves. She moved her left hoof, causing the gold bangles that hung loosely on it to jingle. Though they were to help with anxiety and panic attacks, they offered little solace at this time. She was now technically homeless; putting all her eggs in one basket and heading back to Ponyville. Maybe Suri was right… Maybe she wasn’t meant to make it in this cut throat city. Her heart longed for familiar surroundings and easier living.
Her heart still felt so heavy. Why did it hurt so much? She had come to Manehattan in hopes to follow her passion and it blew up in her face. She struggled for so long on her own, and when she put her trust in somepony, it shattered in front of her.
Her chest was tight - almost suffocating. Her vision was dazed, though she couldn’t tell if it was because of tears or the lack of sleep she had last night. Between the sun and moon sharing the same sky, she spent the majority of her night packing; deciding what she needed and what could be left behind.
Lost in her thoughts, she didn’t realize the train had pulled up at first. She eventually gathered her things and walked on, finding a seat in an empty cart. Briar set her luggage under the seat and sat on the chair, leaning defeated against the window. Her darkened, depressed gaze looked to the landscape of Manehattan as the train began to pull away from the station, causing the scenery she had known for the past few months to glide by. She stifled a gasp as her inhale quivered, fighting back tears that she refused to let fall. Briar had done so much crying… It was so weak and pitiful to cry… She was sick and tired of how easy she was to crack and crumble; the mask she wore of a fake smile breaking under the pressure. She moved to wipe a loose tear as she bit down on her bottom lip.
No more… Now is the time to smile… You are heading home after all. No pony wants to see a sad face. She forced a smile on her lips, ignoring the tears that still slipped past her failing iron will.
...Crack…
She could almost feel the chipping in her metaphorical porcelain mask. I have dealt with worse… I will get past this… This is only temporary… she told herself. Briar was never good at taking her own words to heart, but she still tried. She had grown so numb to these comments; phrases she had heard over and over again.
Briar leaned back in her seat, closing her tired eyes for only a moment before shifting her gaze to the ceiling of her train cart as she continued her quivering breaths, attempting to hold back tears still. She knew she was hard on herself - toxic even. Briar knew that her words wouldn’t solve anything because it had literally been ingrained into her that it was improper to show weakness. There were days she wished she was strong, like her mother… But on those days she had to remind herself how terrifying her mother was when she stood up for herself. She feared what the mare would have to say if she discovered the real reason for Briar’s sudden return. It would likely be best to not mention the whole incident.
Defeated eyes drifted back to the window as the world of Equestria flew past it. Heavy lids slowly opened and closed, allowing little tears to fall as sleep weakened her resolve. Her head began to lower and fatigue finally consumed the brown mare, taking her away to the dark solace of her fragile mind.
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"Ah have crippling depression"
-Edups
Thank you Edups.
8216965
Wat.
Thumps up just for the name!
8238588
I had to laugh when I saw you added it to favourites! I thought it was rather uncanny xD