Rarity Reads a Trashy Romance Novel

by vamparity

2 - Legendary Gossip

The warmth from the sun mixed with the cool breeze to create a layered luxury all around Rarity. And, while she loved the simple joys one could have from walking down the streets of Ponyville, she made sure to check that her large hat was still tied down around her chin. The fabric felt as wonderful as the sun and breeze. She also adjusted her large sunglasses. They too needed to be kept in place.

To her side, Fluttershy began to quietly hum. Another simple joy, Rarity thought to herself. It was a rare treat to catch her in such outgoing spirits. It was as rare as their visits to the spa were becoming.

She felt another breeze brush past her as it gently moved the leaves on a nearby tree. What a contrast to where she had left off in her romance novel, she thought. Was she becoming overly accustomed to these good times and was beginning to crave more adventure and conflict in her life?

She looked at Fluttershy, who smiled back.

No, she thought, everything was perfect in Ponyville. Everything was perfect in her life. She remembered a small desire, but could not place it or recall anything more about it, other than it was small. Small things were insignificant and not worth her time. Nothing big came from something small. She felt so large walking down the small streets of her small town.

Her chinstrap slipped, causing her hat to tilt.

"Oh, look over there," Fluttershy said, "Rainbow Dash and Applejack are having hayburgers. Do you think it would be okay if we stopped and said hi?"

"Yes, of course." Rarity grunted, adjusting her hat and glasses. "Just one moment, dear. I must make myself presentable."

"Do you need some--" Fluttershy was cut off by the sound of Rainbow Dash's laughter.

Rarity looked up and noticed Rainbow was sitting with Applejack at a table outside, and that apparently they were having a good time between themselves as the laugh was not directed at them. She was quick to notice Applejack's large, silly dumb grin in response to Rainbow Dash's outburst. How typical, she thought. They had yet to notice Fluttershy and her standing around the corner.

Before she could think of what to do next, she heard them continue whatever it was they were talking about, and a part of her instinctively lit up. She moved closer to the stone wall of the restaurant, feeling the comfort of its cool touch and concealment. She attempted to calm an increasingly nervous and confused Fluttershy by explaining her actions with one hoof pressed over her lips and a wink.

"Whoo-wee! I would have died if it were me," said Applejack.

"I know, right? I almost died laughing about it now, but at the time," Rainbow Dash looked into the distance with a pause, "It was crazy."

"So, what happened next?"

"Okay, get this. There I was, extremely shocked, but also extremely, you-know…"

Applejack smirked. "I bet."

Rainbow Dashed grinned. "You know it. She was just sitting there on my bed acting all, you-know. Acting like one of her animals. But in a cute way. She is anything but shy when we're alone, if you catch my drift."

"Oh, my," Rarity gasped. "I wonder who they're talking about?" She poked Fluttershy without looking away from the two, to underscore her excitement. "Rainbow Dash has an amour? This is amazing gossip!" She received no response from Fluttershy, who was covering her face with her hooves in embarrassment.

Rainbow Dash stretched in her seat. "And that's all you're getting. Pretty cool though, right?"

"Yeah. And thanks for skipping the spicy details. I'm not sure I could look at her the same way otherwise."

"No problem. I'm just glad you're cool with me bragging about it. It's so awesome!" Rainbow Dash shifted, lowering her gaze on Applejack. "I know it's uh, rough. I mean, before you find someone. And I know you'll snag an awesome mare someday. Maybe not as awesome as I did, but definitely someone awesome."

Rarity froze, save for grabbing Fluttershy with a hoof. She whispered, "Did you hear that? Tell me you heard that, darling!" Fluttershy gave a small 'meep', still trying to hide her face. "Applejack… is into mares?" Rarity tensed up for a reason beyond her comprehension. She knew this was a type of legendary gossip that would be next to impossible to keep under control, and that she had to hear more.

"Shucks, thanks Rainbow. You're getting mighty soft. Another few weeks of this and you shouldn't bother showing up for the running of the leaves."

"Whatever!" Rainbow laughed. "But seriously, AJ, what's going on? The whole town loves you. What gives? You said you'd have someone before I worked up the nerve."

"It's complicated." Applejack looked away, sucking in her lips. "I don't know who to start with or what I want."

Rainbow Dash pointed a hoof at her. "Don't even try that with me! You're such a terrible liar. This proves you have someone in mind and you're too scared to ask her out."

"It does not," Applejack almost spat. "And besides, I'll ask whoever I want, whenever I'm ready to."

"Sure you will. Missed your chance with me, that's for sure!"

They shared a chuckle.

Rainbow Dash smacked the table with an idea. "How about you ask out the next mare you see to prove it?"

"What! What kind of fool thing is that? I told you, Rainbow, I'll--"

"I dare you to ask out the next mare you see." Rainbow casually laid back into her seat. "Loser pays for lunch."

An uncontrollable urge seized Rarity and she shared the dark smirk Rainbow Dash was sporting.

"Um, I think we should leave and hope they don't notice us," Fluttershy offered, before looking out from the safety of her hooves and hair to notice she was now alone.

"Good day, Rainbow Dash and," Rarity gave an extra sway to her strut, "Fair Applejack. Fancy meeting you here." Her smile felt like its ends curled as much as the ends of her hair.

Rainbow Dash blew out her breath, grabbing her sides in laughter. Both her and Rarity's eyes surveyed the wild frontier that was Applejack's face. The features were a blank mouth line and full eyes with a blank stare. A gentle breeze picked up her thick ponytail, as if patting her on the back in consolation.

"Howdy, Rares."

"Is something the matter, darling?" Rarity oozed the last word out from her lips.

"Yeah, Apples. Is there something you need to ask?" Rainbow Dash asked through a smug smile, arms folded.

"Uh, yeah, I guess." Applejack looked directly into Rarity's eyes, causing Rarity to lose her composure and go stiff, feeling as if she were suddenly made of stone and settling into the ground from her newfound weight. Applejack continued, "Hey Rarity, do you want… the rest of my plate?"

Rarity audibly inhaled through her nose.

"I can cut it so the part I bit off ain't touching. Or, uh, I reckon if you want to order something, we can hang out some more."

Rarity closed her eyes, feeling the warmth of the sun again before opening them. She sat down next to Applejack and faced her, fluttering her eyelashes. "Why, thank you! You are such a gentlepony." She folded her hooves so she could rest her chin on them. "Was there… is there anything else you'd like to ask, darling?"

Applejack swallowed. "Er, nope. That's about it." She looked to Rainbow Dash, who was waving the ticket-order at her, taunting her. "Don't worry about that. I'll take the check."

Rainbow and Rarity frowned.

"Oh no you don't!" Rarity exclaimed.

"No I don't what, now?"

Rarity gave a frustrated sigh. She rearranged herself into another practiced pose at the table, a more formal, aloof one this time.

"Applejack, dear, I couldn't help but notice the running of the leaves is approaching."

Applejack adjusted her hat. "Yeah. That it is."

"And," Rarity continued, adjusting her hat as well, keeping her eyes locked with Applejack, whose eyes were also locked with hers hidden behind her shades, "I couldn't help but recall how the event is becoming more and more like heart and hooves day, with how the runners seem to pair off and keep pace with their romantic partners."

"Huh. Never noticed."

"I'm quite surprised," Rarity said, never taking her eyes off of Applejack, with a hoof held in the direction of Rainbow Dash, who was shifting back and forth in her seat impatiently, "As I would have thought you knew." Rarity leaned in for the kill. "Didn't you and Rainbow Dash settle your differences and become close friends during it?"

"Hey!" Rainbow Dash shouted. "What're you implying?"

"Nothing. Nothing at all," Rarity said, leaning back. "Only that our dear, sweet friend Applejack seems to enjoy the company of other mares during romantic holidays."

Applejack sized Rarity up from beneath her hat. "And your point?"

"I am merely stating purely innocent observations. Nothing to get so upset about."

Applejack clenched her jaw. "Who says I'm getting upset? If I may be so observational, I have also noticed you enjoy the company of other mares."

Rarity gasped, and clenched her jaw. "Of course I do. We share the same circle of wonderful friends, darling," she stressed the word 'darling' as if it were venom. "But I also share the company of many stallions in the fashion and entertainment industry."

"And I, too, share the company of many stallions in the farm and rodeo industry. What's your point, sugarcube?" Applejack stressed the word 'sugarcube' as if it were hard sour candy in her mouth.

"My point," Rarity raised her voice, "Is that there are many single stallions out there, who I know for a fact have expressed interest in asking you out. And, that I know, for a fact mind you, that you have turned down. And, also as a fact, that I have never seen you go out on a date with anyone, ever. And that, as I am sure Rainbow Dash can attest to, we are deeply concerned about such facts. And," Rarity's voice was becoming louder, "If there was something you'd like to tell or ask me, you should know that you will always be my friend and have my trust and I will be quite flattered and happy for whatever it is you will say!" Rarity practically shouted.

Applejack stared at Rarity.

Rarity stared at Applejack. Or she tried to, as she could not help but notice a small smudge of dirt on the farmer's hoof.

"Are we talking about me," Applejack cautiously offered, "Or is this actually about how nobody's shown interest in you, besides Spike?"

Rarity rose from her seat, huffing as if she were a giant dragon. She made to flip the table, briefly engulfing it in her magic, but quickly decided Applejack's plate was the wiser target. Off it went, with a satisfied nod of her head.

Applejack rose from her seat. "What did you do that for?"

"For making fun of me! And for belittling Spike!"

"I was not! What are you getting so upset about?"

"Upset? Do you want to see me upset? I will show you upset!"

"Darn it, calm down, Rares. Look, I'm sorry!"

"Don't you tell me what to do, Jacqueline Apple!"

Rainbow Dash began to feel lost, as if she were not at the table but floating above in a cloud, observing the exchange from a distance. She was brought back by a soft nuzzle from Fluttershy. They looked at each other, speaking without words. Rainbow Dash asked about what was going on by waving her eyes to her table partners. Fluttershy shook her head and smiled, telling her it was okay and not to worry.

"Fluttershy, there you are!" Rarity exclaimed. "I believe we are finished here."

"But, um, we just got here."

"We're leaving! Good day, Rainbow Dash." Rarity raised her chin, briefly looked at Applejack, and stomped off.

"Sorry," Fluttershy offered, flapping her wings to quickly glide into place by Rarity's side.

Applejack watched them leave. "What the hay is her problem?"

Comments

[Angius]

"Are we talking about me," Applejack cautiously offered, "Or is this actually about how nobody's shown interest in you, besides Spike?"

That's a 4th degree burn if I've ever seen one

[394VikingPinkiePie]

Gosh do I love a dramatic rarity