First to comment.

Nice job there, dark, intense, immersive. Smooth grammar. You got the skills.
Just like Wolfenstein : Thee New Order. I've immersed myself in this so deep that I've read this in BJ's voice.

6958731 Thank you, as I said in the note, I owe much of the detail to my one time editor tackheart. He suggested and then proceeded to write the italics before going through and re-wording just about the entire prologue with me. (Two days of us just changing thing in the beginning and it doubled the word count. (Luckily he has agreed to stay as Pre-Reader but he won't be editing it again... Thus I need a new editor.)

Did you by any chance have a favorite moment in the fight?

***Update***

Chapter 1 is nearing completion however I still don't have a new editor. If anyone is interested please feel free to PM me.

6959070 somewhere between the Downing of Lightning Dust and Dash's Shotdown.

6965427 Admittedly things did get a tad hairy there huh?