The Last Days of Sweetie Drops

by legomaster00156

Who Let the Dog Out?

Sweetie Drops knew that when she was summoned to Canterlot, it wasn't for anything good. It had been less than a week since the bugbear's escape, which was quickly decided to be one of the biggest security leaks in the MDF's history. She guessed that either she was about to be dismissed, or else sent somewhere inhospitable like the frozen north. The punishment patrol, it was called.

“It wouldn't be so bad, being head of the punishment patrol, right?” she thought to herself, grinding her teeth as she walked through the city. “I'm sure there are perfectly decent ponies there. They can't have all be insubordinate. Maybe they just had uncontrollable problems. Like me. Yeah. That would be fine.”

Her own pep talk fell on deaf ears.

Sweetie checked the streets twice before darting into an unassuming alleyway. The secrecy of the MDF was found not in hiding underground, or in some far-off cave. They found that an unassuming door with the words “employees only” worked far better for keeping ponies from being curious, even when the door was attached to no visible business. She unlocked the door in the alley and just strode right in.

The round table was already set up. Sweetie noticed an unusual crowd at the long conference table, with only one seat left open for her. By the looks of it, the head ponies of every branch in Equestria had been summoned, though she had expected it to be only her. That thought was pushed to the back of her mind, though, by the pony dwarfing everyone else.

“Your Majesty,” she breathed, as she bowed to Princess Celestia.

“Sit, Agent Sweetie Drops,” Celestia commanded. She did not sound angry, at least.

Sweetie Drops took the last available seat and again surveyed her peers. She counted a total of 18 ponies, including her and the Princess. Even in times of crisis, it was rare that every branch would be called to a meeting. What was going on today?

“You all surely have the same question on your minds,” Celestia said. “I will answer it. Recently, there has been a massive security leak from Tartarus, as you have already read about. I am not blind to the good work you ponies have done over the past thirty years in my service. Your organization has given everything – your time, your liberty, your very lives – to protecting the ponies of this nation, and for that, I am grateful.”

“But...” Sweetie thought to herself.

“But a leak of this magnitude cannot be ignored.”

And with that, every pair of eyes was on Sweetie Drops. As the Princess stayed silent, she realized this was her chance to make a defense, or else hold her tongue forever. But what defense could she make?

“Your Majesty, I am truly sorry for the escape of the bugbear. As the leader of the Tartarus team, it was my responsibility to ensure nothing escaped, and in this, I failed. I take full responsibility, and I only request that you are lenient towards my subordinate agents,” Sweetie said, with a bow of her head.

“I appreciate your integrity, Agent Sweetie Drops,” Celestia said compassionately. “I am afraid, however, that the time for your services has come to an end... All of your services.”

A collective gasp rose from around the table, as every agent there suddenly realized what was going on. The Monster Defense Force was being disbanded.

“Your Majesty!” Sweetie exclaimed. “I'll take the blame, but please-!”

“No, Agent!” Celestia bellowed, using her Royal Canterlot Voice for the first time in years. She quickly quieted. “This is not the first security leak in recent years. Should I remind you of the brown naga in Hoofsburg, or the chimera in Ponyville?”

“My division took care of that chimera in just days, Your Majesty!” one of the stallions at the table protested.

“After it sent three ponies to the hospital for poison treatment and nearly devoured a colt!” Celestia scolded. “It took four weeks just to divert the press from the truth about its attacks! It seems clear to me that, for all the good intentions in the world, this organization has gotten sloppy. I have only a few tasks left before I sign the papers at the end of the month.”

Celestia's horn glowed as several job files flew out to each pony at the table. They all opened their files and frowned as they read the contents. For most, it was the same: destroy any evidence of the organization's existence, including their bases if feasible. The alien-hunting organization in Cartiff would apparently be assisting (Sweetie never did like them much, though). In addition, Sweetie's division was to create myths of a guard dog keeping demons at bay in Tartarus. She'd question Celestia about that later.

“I want complete deniability of the Monster Defense Force's existence. Do I make myself clear?” Celestia asked imperiously.

“Yes, Your Majesty!” everypony said at once.

---

It must have been a sight, coming back to the Tartarus base. Sweetie Drops was followed by a massive, three-headed dog on a leash that frankly would not be able to hold it if it ran. As Cherry Heart and White Flame ran out to meet their boss, they looked with confusion between the dog and the much smaller, slightly distraught pony.

“Ma'am, what kind of monster is that?” White Flame asked. Sweetie just mumbled something inaudible. “Ma'am?”

“It's... our replacement. We're all fired," Sweetie mumbled, this time more clearly.

There were the gasps. White Flame looked surprised enough, but Cherry took it even worse. She began bawling her eyes out on the spot. Sweetie recoiled a bit before the great dog behind her walked up and began licking the sobbing mare with all three heads. Three foot-long tongues provide a lot of slobber, and Cherry only stopped crying in surprise and disgust at suddenly being soaked.

"This is our replacement?" White Flame repeated incredulously. "What is it, even?"

"A bulldog," Sweetie answered. "A magically altered and specially trained one, but still just a bulldog."

"So, what, is our new job to clean up poop in Tartarus?" White Flame asked dully.

"Well, no." Sweetie reached into her saddlebags and pulled out files for her two friends. "Everything you need to know is in these. Your future is up to you. You may keep enough supplies or tools of your choice to fill a single 1.4 cubic meter briefcase, and everything else is getting destroyed. This includes your former identities."

"What? We can't even keep our names?" Cherry exclaimed, looking ready to burst into tears again.

"I'm sorry. This whole ordeal... it comes from the Princess herself. There's nothing I can do," Sweetie said, regret clear in her tone. She tried to sound more optimistic. "Please, don't see this as the end. It's just... it's a chance to get a fresh start. Like, you're a really amazing baker. Maybe you can follow your special talent now, instead of living out in the middle of nowhere like we do. I'd pay your bakery a visit, for sure!"

"I don't want to be a baker. Not for a career. I was going to put my heart and soul into this job. I wanted to keep ponies safe," Cherry said, sniffling.

"I've never even considered a life outside of the Defense Force," White Flame said shakily. "My parents were in the first generation of it, I'm in the second..."

"And there won't be a third, because it's not just us. The entire organization is going down, and it's my fault," Sweetie said, shaking her head solemnly. "I'm truly sorry, girls. Let's just enjoy our jobs while we still have them. We've got to make an entire legend around Sloppy here."

"Yes, ma'am," the mares said in unison, neither voice enthused.

---

The three mares were seated around their dining table. Cerberus was put inside of Tartarus to begin his duties, leaving them to manage their own job. However, none of them knew where to begin.

"Just how do you make a legend in less than a month?" Cherry asked, breaking the awkward silence. "The very definition of a legend is in being ancient."

"Yeah, and we need to pretend Sloppy is ancient. He's both our replacement and the cover-up for our existence here," Sweetie replied.

"Can we start with a cooler name?" White Flame asked. "Like... Fenrir!"

"Cŵn!" Cherry suggested.

"Shisa!" White Flame shouted.

"Cerberus!" Cherry countered.

"Sirius!" White Flame said, slamming a hoof on the table triumphantly.

"Anub-" Cherry began, before being cut off by a raised hoof from Sweetie.

"I preferred Cerberus, myself. Any objections, White Flame?" Sweetie asked, mostly to move things along.

"Eh, I guess not. It is a pretty cool name," the pegasus admitted.

"Alright, Cerberus. Onto more important matters, we need to come up with the legend behind the dog. Its creation, how it was forced into servitude, how old it is, so on and so forth," Sweetie said. On cue, Cherry levitated a quill and notepad.

"Wait... do we really have to?" Cherry asked. "The ponies out there know almost nothing about Tartarus, after all, beyond that it exists. Could we not simply say that Cerberus has been there for as long as ponies are aware of? The less details we give out, the less holes inquisitive ponies could dig into."

"You have a good point. Actually, if we just faked a discovery somewhere..." Sweetie trailed off. "Cherry, we're going to make scrolls of vague legends and enchant them to look older than they really are. Then we need to hide them. White Flame, I'm putting you in charge of getting in touch with the archeological society. Get them to investigate the site and find the scrolls. Everything after that is out of our hooves."

"This is a really weird job..." Cherry said.

---

Luckily, things went off without a hitch, besides a few questions about just how this cache was learned about. White Flame decided to toss the discovery off on some stallion named Doctor Caballeron. Being an opportunistic archeologist, he was more than happy to play along with the cover story the mare fed him, especially when it catapulted his status among his peers. It also meant he was able to sell the scrolls for a pretty bit. The mares had a good laugh about how gullible they all were.

Sadly, all good things come to an end, including the last month of their careers...

Author's Note:

Bonus points to those who catch the shout-out to another show.