Adventure awaits for a farm pony who embarks on a quest that is unknown to her that will change her life and Equestria's for an eternity to come. Friendships, betrayals, guns, and lessons on how to be a Bad Ass are ahead.
I hated writing the prologue. I struggle with Celestia's perspective on life in all fiction I write with her in it. Is she condescending? Is she sympathetic? As she as clueless as Luna and just hides it well? I have like 5 different Celestia headcanons in there. ^.^
The pacing will get better, promise. I'm usually great plotting and pacing in the beginning, but with a universe like Borderlands, the beginning is super slow. Once everything gets defined as a separate being from Equestria as well as the formula, it should get better when we get deeper. Like elbow deep. Like sniper barrel deep. Like shotgun deep in a zombie apocalypse. Like... yeah.
5647920 Oh, also, could you maybe include more discriptions of things the story mentions? Or like, show a picture or something.
It helps if you pretend that that your story is going to be a show or movie and the producers need your help with what stuff looks like. Point would be: what would you describe you story as? Comprende? Got it? You understand?
Okay, so when you'er trying to express a character's thoughts via direct context (first person) try to put them in italics.
It helps.
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If the entire thing is in first person, shouldn't it be assumed?
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I hated writing the prologue. I struggle with Celestia's perspective on life in all fiction I write with her in it. Is she condescending? Is she sympathetic? As she as clueless as Luna and just hides it well? I have like 5 different Celestia headcanons in there. ^.^
The pacing will get better, promise. I'm usually great plotting and pacing in the beginning, but with a universe like Borderlands, the beginning is super slow. Once everything gets defined as a separate being from Equestria as well as the formula, it should get better when we get deeper. Like elbow deep. Like sniper barrel deep. Like shotgun deep in a zombie apocalypse. Like... yeah.
5647891 Yes, but I'm talking about the actual thoughts inside the character's head.
5647920 Oh, also, could you maybe include more discriptions of things the story mentions? Or like, show a picture or something.
It helps if you pretend that that your story is going to be a show or movie and the producers need your help with what stuff looks like. Point would be: what would you describe you story as?
Comprende? Got it? You understand?
5647920 This story has quite a bit of potential, if you can just pull this off I will greatly respect you as a writer.