ROB's Speed Fics

by ROBCakeran53

Hammer of Love

Author's Note:

PANIC! FICTION! 55. 9/12/2020. Prompt: Vintage Hammer. MINIMUM word count of 250, with 22 minutes to write and 4 to edit/cry. (no placement) (special thanks to Cara and Red for editing)

Mi Amore Cadenza looked upon her husband, the father of her alicorn foal, as he lay upon the kitchen floor of their Castle Suite.

“Any last words?” she asked, a massive hammer held above her head with her hooves.

Because when it came to love magic, it didn’t always equal physical violence. No, that was usually saved for the bedroom.

“Uh…” Shining thought, forehooves against his chest, rear legs hugging as high as they could to cover his unmentionables, tail firmly between them. “I love you?”

Cadence smiled, and with the aid of gravity brought the hammer down upon her husband, followed by a loud SPLAT!

The changeling exploded into a mist of green goop, splattering everywhere, including Flurry Heart who giggled as small globs splattered her upon her high chair.

“Splat! Daddah Splat!”

Cadence sighed. “No, Flurry, that wasn’t Daddy. That was another rogue changeling. Come on, we need to find Sunburst and Daddy.”

“Yay! ‘Burr fine Daddah!” Flurry cheered, while Cadance wiped off the globs of green from her daughter, and then herself.

“Yes, Sunburst will find Daddy. Let’s go.”

Cadence attached her saddle for Flurry to ride upon her back, and they marched out of their suite. Immediately two guards followed close behind.

“Princess, you’re not expected for-”

“Stoic, he’s a changeling.”

The guard who’d spoken up froze, and before they could react the other guard took the hammer provided by his princess and smashed them into a green puddle.

“Your highness, your awareness is uncanny.”

“Yeah, well, it has to be, after a dozen times of this you get used to it.”

“Very well. Shall I company you, or shall I spread word in the castle?”

“There’s no need. Stay along, it might be fun.”

“Yay, fine Daddah!”

“Yes, we’re going to find Sunburst, and then hopefully Shi- I mean, Prince Shining Armor.”

“Very well, your highness.”

And so the three traveled, finding two more disguised changelings before they came upon Sunburst’s private study.

Cadance gave two gentle knocks, hesitated, and then three loud knocks.

Nothing came from the other side. With a relieved sigh, Cadance opened the door herself and marched in on Sunburst buried in a book.

“Highness, how do you-”

“The real Sunburst is much like my sister in law. They glue themselves into a book. If anypony had answered the door looking like him,” she pointed to the stallion engrossed in a book, “then I’d known right away they were expecting company, which Sunburst never does.”

With that, she tapped the stallion’s shoulder, making him jump.

“What!? Oh, Princess! What can I do for you?”

“Changelings.”

He blinked. “What?”

“Buggos!” Flurry cheered, waving her hooves. “Fine Daddah!”

“Oh. Oh! Oh dear, we need to act quick before-”

“My guess is half the staff has already been replaced. So, we go to the cellar.”

Sunburst fidgeted on his hooves. “I… detest that place.”

“Which is why changelings would love it. Everypony hates that place.”

Unable to argue, the four now marched towards the cellar staircase, taking out another half dozen changelings, their numbers growing thicker with each regular pony stationed.

At last, the old stairs, built by the former King Sombra himself, came into view. Old, sturdy, and yet having a flare for the vintage look one would expect from Canterlot Castle, or maybe even older, pre-Equestrian structures.

So downward they traveled, cobwebs covering many of the walls and ceilings, however many of the crystal torches were already lit. Deeper and deeper they descended, until talk and banter could be heard. One such voice was clearly Shining Armor, and he did not sound pleased at all.

Cadance pressed an ear against the door, and upon some more talk, frowned, and reared her rear legs and bucked open a door. It exploded into splinters, causing all the ponies, and few changelings, inside to scatter and take cover.

“Cadey! Uh, what… what’s going-”

Flurry Heart was launched into Shining’s face with a screeching “Daaddaaaah!” and a face hug. A few of the undressed guards shied away from their ruler. The three changeling drones all hid behind their queen, Chrysallis, as she frowned.

“This is the third session you’ve broken up of ours. It’s as if you dislike me being the DM.”

Cadance huffed. “Well yes, especially when you exclude me and have these secret sessions.”

Sunburst, meanwhile, continued to peer from around the door edge, looking on with horror.